@ReanimatedGB
She's not lovely, though. She's selfish, with the hide of a rhino, and thinks her wishes matter more than yours. Be smilingly firm and consistent 'Sorry, that's not convenient.' 'Sorry, I'm busy right now.' And stick to it. Don't answer the phone or the door if you don't want to. She is not your responsibility and, from what you have said, she has plenty of people to entertain her so it's fine for you to do what works for you.
This ^ And also many more posters here have put some great posts highlighting that this woman - and the friendship you have with her - is not good. It's toxic actually.
Yep I have to say YANBU. This woman sounds like a piece of work, and living next to her sounds like a nightmare.
This is the problem with becoming too friendly with neighbours, and people who are at home all the time can sometimes become insufferable. Some people are fine, like I am - and so are many people on this forum. I, (again like many people here,) enjoy my own company, and would find having to see a neighbour twice a DAY like a fucking prison sentence.
I don't see my family and friends even a TENTH of that amount. I see close family once a week, (and several others once a month! And these people live only half hour's drive away!) I see my 3 friends (all don't know each other and live 12-20 miles from me,) around once a month too. I can easily be on my own in the house for 8 hours a day for a month, and be happy with that. I cannot BEAR people popping round and hate entertaining people (except family obvs! I am happy for them to come round, but even THEY only come twice a month or so.)
I work from home, part time hours and DH works (30 miles away,) and is away Mon-Thur, (8am til 7pm,) and home Fri, Sat, and Sun, and I LOVE my 4 days to myself.
I have had people in houses we lived in before who felt the need to keep pestering me and keep on asking for favours and lifts, and kept knocking the door, and wanting to pop in for coffee and it drove me BATSHIT. I was glad to leave the area.
As I said, I don't like having people round, I don't like group meetings, or hobby groups, or social groups, and rarely mix with people. I used to, some years back, from childhood up to my early 40's in various activities involving my kids, neighbourhood activities, and was in couply relationships with DH and other couples vom , but most of them didn't end well or just burnt out. As I said, I now only have 3 friends who I see once a month or so, and my family who I see 1 to 2 times a month. (And adult children who I see once a week.)
I agree with the posters here who have said you already HAVE a problem in your relationship with this woman, so can things really be any worse? As I said though, this is the problem with being friendly with neighbours; it gets awkward if someone becomes too intense, or if you fall out.
Many of the stories of woe and doom and massive fall-outs on 'nightmare neighbour from hell; on tv, are about neighbours who hate each other, but were good friends (and very close) beforehand, for several years. It's rarely neighbours who had little to do with each other who fall out badly.
You need to stop answering the door @DaisyDrip Sorry, cannot say more than what others have said. Just start distancing yourself. I have had to do this to people who have been a nuisance. It's hard when they live closeby though I know.
Frankly, I would rather spend my life alone, than have someone constantly buzzing around me, making demands on me, coming round my house every day, and pestering me, expecting to be entertained, and boring me shitless with their inane drivel and fucking moaning!