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AIBU?

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Original poster

Teacher binning clothes

79 replies

DownToTheRiver818 · 21/03/2018 15:44

DS (10) was back from residential trip today, tearfully the first thing he said to me off the bus was that Mr X put his wellies, jacket & waterproof trousers in the bin that morning. He said he’d taken them off after a muddy activity and hung them/put them where they usually do. He was told they’d been binned as he’d left them out.

It sounds like they’d been told to pack them immediately and ds hadn’t heard/hadn’t been listening.

Is this ok even if a warning has been given? It’s not punishing him so much as us.

He could well have just said he’s binned them but has kept them separate as ‘lost property’, maybe to teach him a lesson?

I’ll be seeing teacher after school tomorrow to clarify but WIBU to ask that they are replaced if they have been chucked?

OP posts:
FithColumnist · 21/03/2018 21:57

God forbid a child is at any time anxious about absolutely anything! The teacher should clearly be up in front of a disciplinary hearing immediately.

Anasnake · 21/03/2018 22:01

Or the child has the left them / lost them and is making up a story about the teacher binning them ?? Hmm

cloudyweewee · 21/03/2018 22:03

Demand that this asshole teacher be sacked and forced to run 3 laps of the playground wearing just a pair of wellies. That'll teach the power crazed bastard.

WitchDancer · 21/03/2018 22:26

As a scout leader I know the hassle of unnamed property and the denial of said items belonging to anyone. Under no circumstances would I dream of throwing anything away - it gets put in the bag of doom, and adults are given the opportunity of rummaging if they want. This includes odd socks, coats, hair decorations, towels, and even bags of sweets, you name it, in the bag it goes 😕

HermionesRightHook · 21/03/2018 22:39

I can understand the school binning muddy items after a trip if no one's claimed them after a month or so - but not straightaway, that's terrible practice.

And if the teacher was lying to the child to scare them that's even worse - there's plenty of kids that would know what an immense hardship it would be for their parents to replace them. Hell, we're fairly well off compared to most but would struggle to find the money for a set of new outdoor gear, especially as I bet some of it was bought recently for the trip.

Willow2017 · 21/03/2018 22:39

fifth my son was having proper panic attacks over bullying at school. Cahms were involved to get teachers to deal with it properly (which they never really did). Consequently he gets anxious about things. If a teacher was responsible for making his life a misery again for any reason yes i would be complaining loudly. Lying to a child causing them to cry because he believed his clothes had been binned is pathetic and no teacher worth his salt would do that.

Idontdowindows · 22/03/2018 08:27

I'm only here to find out if he did really bin them. Keeping them to make a point, meh, could have done better, but binning clothes that have a known owner is not on.

Original poster
DownToTheRiver818 · 22/03/2018 09:11

He’s hardly going to lie when he knows I’ll be speaking to teacher, I’m 100% sure of that.

I’ll let you the outcome this evening but I’m hoping ds comes home with them after school, after a lecture about paying attention.

OP posts:
Idontdowindows · 22/03/2018 09:49

He’s hardly going to lie when he knows I’ll be speaking to teacher, I’m 100% sure of that.

Oh sure, but the teacher could have lied to your son to "teach him a lesson". Stupid, but I've seen some stupid teachers in my time.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 22/03/2018 10:10

Grin Seniorcitizen.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 22/03/2018 10:16

I asked DD about this last night. When the DC were packing, the teacher constantly went over with them, "Can you see anything at all that might be yours?" DD's incurably absent minded, but she brought everything home, not even a missing sock. That's the proper approach.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 22/03/2018 10:17

Also, they had room inspections every morning, and it's much easier to find things in a tidy room.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 22/03/2018 10:20

Fith that's not the point. Some parents can't afford to replace expensive items.

YorkieDorkie · 22/03/2018 10:37

I'm a teacher and I wouldn't dream of throwing out anyone's things!! I even bag up the undies after an accident - most parents say "just bin them" but I like to be sure. There's no way I'd be binning expensive outdoor clothing. It might not even be his! Plenty of people borrow things from other parents for residential trips. Totally unreasonable if true. I hope the teacher has a bag of lost property to hand out.

Original poster
DownToTheRiver818 · 22/03/2018 10:55

I’m not debating my ds is at fault for not packing correctly, he wouldn’t be in this mess if he had payed attention. But teacher is at fault too if they are binned.

DS version: Everything had been packed, after they were packed they had a muddy activity. Instead of packing these items immediately he hung them up (along side someone else’s coat) to get them after the last activity before leaving. He must have been told not to do this but he says he didn’t hear that. Teacher knew they were ds’s, reminded him they’d been left in dorm and said he put them in bin. I’m presuming the other students jacket was ‘binned’ too but ds didn’t hear.

Ds isn’t stupid, he knows that if teacher didn’t say any of this then he’s in huge trouble. I can’t see him taking this risk. If he’d left them behind and not realised I’d have been annoyed but not furious, as I would with an epic lie like this.

Anyway it’s all speculation until I speak to teacher. I’m now confident of what steps I’ll take it they are binned (as per ds version), which was why I posted - if they turn up then that’s fine.

Ds has taken in a big pile of treats for all the teachers away so hopefully they realise they are appreciated.

OP posts:
YorkieDorkie · 22/03/2018 11:14

Aw your poor DS. He has been punished for using common sense it seems. What a shame. I really hope the teacher was just trying to teach him a bit of a lesson for not listening but it seems unreasonable to me. It should have been pretty obvious that he was trying to dry them out before packing them!

SquirrelsareUs · 22/03/2018 12:35

To those saying that everything should have the child's name on it, yes, everything should. I was obsessive about this, to the extent that my children's coats had not just their name but our phone number in them in case they "lost" them on the bus or somewhere where there was not a finite group of potenital owners.
So when DS went on a residential camp everything in the luggage was carefully labelled.
When he got home I said "where's your big yellow bath towell?"
"You didn't pack it", he replied...." I had to make do for 5 days with the hand towel."

Not so....the big yellow towel was one of the last things I packed (on the grounds that it would be one of the first things he needed at bedtime.)
So I went up to the school and asked the teachers about it "oh, yes" one said, "I think we did briing back a big yellow towel" - and there it was... complete with name label that no one had bothered to check!

We worked out afterwards what had happened... DS had initially been put in one dorm and had started to unpack and then for some reason the teachers had moved him into a different dorm... but the towel had stayed in the first place... that no one had bothered to pick it up and look at the label for 5 days is not really surprising, but that the teachers when happening upon an abandonned towel during the pre-departure roomcheck didn't actually look to see who it belonged to, left me wondering why I bothered to label everything so carefully in the first place.
Of course I told DS it was his own fault for thinking that I'd have neglected to send such an important item of kit - he should know me better than that.

Hope you are reunited with your son's kit rapidly, OP.

Original poster
DownToTheRiver818 · 22/03/2018 18:10

Got his stuff back! He pointed to a bag and said I think you’ll find they’re in there. Ds said “you said you’d put them in the bin” teacher laughed... I said that’s good ds was really worried about it, teacher replied “yeah”.

Didn’t challenge him or anything as didn’t want to make it awkward for ds.

OP posts:
MrsHathaway · 22/03/2018 18:39

Thank goodness for that.

I have a literal child too. He would absolutely have believed the teacher.

BlondeB83 · 22/03/2018 18:43

It will likely be in a bin bag not the actual bin to prove a point. It’s often done with abandoned pumps at my school!

BlondeB83 · 22/03/2018 18:44

I doubt your DS will do it again.

ReanimatedSGB · 22/03/2018 18:50

I'm glad you've got them back but I would be inclined to have a word with this teacher's next-up-the-line about lying to kids, particularly about something like destruction of property in a poor area. As PP have said, if that had been a kid whose parents had borrowed the waterproof gear and warned the kid to take good care of it, that kid would be in absolute anguish over being lied to like that...

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 22/03/2018 18:53

Glad you got them back, but I'd still be pissed off at the teacher. DD wouldn't have been able to cope.

OddS0ck · 22/03/2018 18:55

Stupid of the teacher. My ex would have had the shit kicked out of him if he'd gone home with the same story your son did.
Not that he'd have had waterproof clothes or boots provided.

LJdorothy · 22/03/2018 20:47

'He must have been told not to do this, but he says he didn't hear'. Oh please. You mean he wasn't listening to or was disobeying instructions. I just can't believe that anyone on here actually thought the teacher would have binned a pupil's expensive waterproof clothing. Of course he hadn't. Why on earth would he??? It was a joke. Mild teasing at worst. Have a word with the teacher's 'next-up-the-line' if you want, but I suspect they'll both think you're being ridiculously precious.