Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Teacher binning clothes

79 replies

DownToTheRiver818 · 21/03/2018 15:44

DS (10) was back from residential trip today, tearfully the first thing he said to me off the bus was that Mr X put his wellies, jacket & waterproof trousers in the bin that morning. He said he’d taken them off after a muddy activity and hung them/put them where they usually do. He was told they’d been binned as he’d left them out.

It sounds like they’d been told to pack them immediately and ds hadn’t heard/hadn’t been listening.

Is this ok even if a warning has been given? It’s not punishing him so much as us.

He could well have just said he’s binned them but has kept them separate as ‘lost property’, maybe to teach him a lesson?

I’ll be seeing teacher after school tomorrow to clarify but WIBU to ask that they are replaced if they have been chucked?

OP posts:
Notevilstepmother · 21/03/2018 17:11

I’d wait for the other side of the story, and in the meanwhile I’d probably be telling DS that he needs to listen properly and do as he is told in future. It’s very annoying when children ignore instructions that are given to help them. Especially for teachers who have freely given up their evenings and sleep and time with their own family to give children residential trips.

NotAgainYoda · 21/03/2018 17:15

Notevil

Must she do that? Isn't it more fun to come on here?

CheesyWeez · 21/03/2018 17:16

Maybe contact the residential centre and ask them to find the clothes?
Could you go there? Is it very far away?

I would be annoyed in your position OP.

The centre might find the waterproofs and you could get them posted, or donate them for another child to use there.

Did your son enjoy the trip otherwise?

Bellamuerte · 21/03/2018 17:17

It's technically theft. The teacher has no right to bin someone's belongings. They obviously knew the clothes belonged to one of the kids on the residential trip and should have made efforts to identify the owner. Presumably your DS had his name written on his clothes? If the items were disposed of several weeks later because they couldn't find the owner, then fair enough, but disposing of clothes that clearly belong to one of the kids on the trip is unreasonable. In your shoes I'd ask for the clothes to be replaced.

Original poster
DownToTheRiver818 · 21/03/2018 17:27

Obviously I’ve told him he should listen... this first thing I said was you’ve obviously not been listening when he said to pack them. But if this is true then that’s not on.

I’m posting before I know for sure as I wanted to know how best to handle it once I know - as I’m very people pleasing non confrontational so didn’t want be left tongue tied.

OP posts:
Chocolala · 21/03/2018 17:32

If he did bin them, he replaces them. It’s theft.

Original poster
DownToTheRiver818 · 21/03/2018 17:36

Only the jacket had his name on, so if they were genuinely lost I’ve no one to blame but myself.

The outdoor Centre is a couple of hours away. If teacher/son has left them there I’ll phone them to look for them.

Ds won’t have lied as he knows I’m going to clarify with teacher what happened, but it’s veey possible he’s got the wrong end of the stick.

OP posts:
PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 21/03/2018 17:36

I'd have gone nuts if a teacher had done that to DD, I've had to ask family to pay for 2 residential trips for her, and buy most of the clothes, I'd have cried at all that money just being literally thrown in the bin.

Original poster
DownToTheRiver818 · 21/03/2018 17:37

And yes cheesy he had a lovely time otherwise thank you!

OP posts:
YearOfYouRemember · 21/03/2018 17:40

I hope it's a misunderstanding and the teacher hasn't decided he has the authority to confiscate, well throw away, a child's belongings.

Notevilstepmother · 21/03/2018 17:43

I hope it’s all a misunderstanding.

endofthelinefinally · 21/03/2018 17:52

Whenever my DC went on this sort of trip we were told to pack a bin bag to bring muddy clothes home. Could that possibly be something to do with this?

If the teacher has thrown away the clothes that is really shocking. These things are very expensive.

BruceFoxton · 21/03/2018 17:52

I’m a teacher. The sort of a-hole teacher who does stuff like this needs calling out as they are usually pains in the arse in lots of other ways. Things like this make them feel powerful. They are probably tyrants in lots of little ways that make kids despise them.

Original poster
DownToTheRiver818 · 21/03/2018 17:54

Just asked ds for more details. During is last activity teacher asked him if he’d forgotten anything, ds: erm I don’t know, MrX: jacket etc? Ds: oh yeah I was going to get them after this MrX: not anymore I’ve put them in the bin. Ds asked if he was joking, he said no and walked away.

So no misunderstanding, although I suspect teacher is bluffing and has items. Shitty thing to say to him but maybe after 3 days of children not listening he snapped...

OP posts:
LexieLulu · 21/03/2018 18:02

Doesn't sound like teacher should be in that career then.

Being a teacher requires a lot of patience.

Comments like that are in appropriate

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 21/03/2018 19:14

I'm sure you know this, everything a child takes on a residential trip should have their name on.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 21/03/2018 19:32

I'm really shocked! I can't imagine DD's teacher doing that!

Seniorcitizen1 · 21/03/2018 20:13

Take an invoice in with you for replacements. When I was at a school a PE teacher encoyraflged boys at end of very muddy football game to push one boy in so covered in mud. Next day his mother came into his classroom and dumped said muddy football strip on teachers desk with packet of daz, told him to wash them, and stormed out

LJdorothy · 21/03/2018 20:17

The teacher won't have chucked them. The clothes will be in a bin bag because that's where the teacher will have put them when the child failed to follow his instructions to pick them up. If the teacher hadn't done it for him then the clothes would still be in the Outdoor Centre and the OP have lost them anyway. I am totally failing to see where people think the teacher has gone wrong. He is dealing with a child who doesn't bother to follow instructions and the 'lots of patience' approach clearly isn't working.

Willow2017 · 21/03/2018 20:32

He wouldnt have lost them as he was going to get them after the activity they were doing.
If some teacher did that to one if my ds's stuff he would have been in a real atate of anxiety all the way home. I would wipe the floor with him for putting him through that. Lying to kids to scare them is hardly leading by example.

Original poster
DownToTheRiver818 · 21/03/2018 20:41

LJ they weren’t ever lost. If he’d tidied them up fair enough, but if so then he’s lied to DS.

I’ll get teachers side tomorrow, I appreciate he would have been tired and frustrated. But still.

OP posts:
KatherinaMinola · 21/03/2018 20:54

I am totally failing to see where people think the teacher has gone wrong

Well, if - as the DS reports - the teacher said that he'd binned them, that is clearly wrong. Imagine the stress that would cause for a child who knows his parents can't afford to replace the items.

Lying to kids and deliberately scaring them is poor practice and we all know it.

tumbleweed38 · 21/03/2018 20:57

teacher knackered at the end of a trip has made a throw away remark? see what i did there

LJdorothy · 21/03/2018 21:34

Why don't we wait and see what the teacher's side of this particular story is? I'm willing to bet it is somewhat different,.

Amanduh · 21/03/2018 21:45

Last time I was on a residential teo children left their muddy boots in the hallway of the guest house, found after we were leaving and all packed up, suitcases away and locked. After two rounds of making children check against lists they had everything. All assured me they did.
Asked them all if they’d lost boots.
No.
Held them up in front of all the kids.
No.
Took them on bus to ferry. Asked at front of coach, made all the kids look.
No.
Walked up and down coach to each pair of children.
No.
Told children we had nowhere to put soiled wellies and they must have been left by previous children. All agreed.
Wellies went in bin at guest house when driver dropped us off he took them back with him and binned them (they were moving and selling up)
Back to school, waved kids off.
Monday morning angry parent - lost wellies.
Also parent of child who lost her digital camera over the side of the ferry, apparently that was the schools fault as well.
Not saying that this teacher is right but we took the authority to throw them away that time!