Can I have a big kick up the ass please

[NotUmbongoUnchained]

Whenever i get a bit depressed can’t seem to do anything. My diet goes bad, the house is a mess. I’m sat on the sofa under a blanket just staring at the tidying that needs doing and thinking about the beds that’s need changing and the washing needs doing.
What gets you motivated on days like this? I literally feel like I can’t move.

Sod the tidying and the beds and the washing - get yourself a cup of tea and drink it while on the sofa with the blanket. Reassess only once you have tea inside you :)

I don’t drink tea 😭

I am useless

A walk outside in the sunshine and fresh air.... a little run or brisk walk

Always lifts my mood a bit

This is me today! I just can't move

Take the washing downstairs or strip the bed & take that downstairs. Just one part of one task. It gets you over the initial inertia.
(And I'd have put the kettle on at that point while close by!)

My husband and children will be home at 6:30 so I’m hoping to have manned up and gotten everything done by then but I can’t see it happening!

Does putting on music help get you going?

Then spend a little longer and make a not to big list,then cross of the non essentials like tidying beds and write down close bedroom doors,family can do own beds.
Then just do one thing,like bring the washing downstairs when you go to the toilet.Cross it off the list.
Just do the essentials.The rest can wait for another day,sometimes the sofa is the only place to be.

What about starting to tidy around you then spreading out.

Is there a table next to you with junk on? Clean it

Any other mess around the sofa? Clean that too

What about mess in the room you are in? Give it a quick tidy and possibly a hoover

Are you in PJs? Have a shower and put outdoor clothes on. Perhaps put some make up on if that's your thing.

I find doing little bits at a time helps. I tidied my small bathroom once and it put me on a high for a week.

Don't worry I've sat on my backside for the past hour and half whole the baby naps...I should be doing jobs but I've watched a film and eaten chocolate 😁

OK we can think of tea alternatives! Get thee any drink you do like and enjoy it under the blanket. Dealing with this sort of thing is one small step at a time, think 5 minutes ahead only

Hot chocolate then? And in answer to your question, music, loud (depending on neighbours) and either singing, dancing about or drumming on the kitchen worktop. Makes the biggest difference for me.

I've spent all day tidying the bloody lounge. I'm still not finished and I also need to change the beds and get the clothes out of the dryer. I'm getting through it by thinking how nice it will be when I sit down later in a tidy room (with candles) and a glass of wine to watch Shetland!

Sometimes when I can't get going, a hot shower and body scrub gives me a shove in the right direction too.

Spring is coming which means more light and warmth which always helps me. Hope you feel better soon.

Two things help me:

1. telling myself it's just an illness, like a bad cold, that it won't go on for ever, and meanwhile it's OK to be nice to myself

2. doing housework by time chunks rather than by jobs. "the biggest impact I can make within 20mins". In your case, shove a wash on, then spend the rest of the 20mins doing the tidying that will make the most impact. Save the beds till you feel better. If 20 mins seems too long, try 10.

Once I start I know I won’t be able to stop and it will be a huge thing. I’m an all or nothing sort of person. I’m just so tired. But I know the house being a mess makes me feel worse.

Battling depression is a full time job. It's ok sometimes if that's all you can do.

Put on the telly to a programme you like (obviously not BBC). Every time there is an advert on, do a quick blitz of a room (ie: take all the mugs to the sink, strip one bed, etc). You would be amazed how much you can get done in 4 commercial breaks. Plus you rush back to not miss your programme.

I tend to do short yoga sessions whenever I’m trying to get a grip and motivate myself. I watch Yoga With Adriene on YouTube and choose an appropriate sounding video (“energising yoga” or “morning yoga”, for example) and do a quick 15-20 -minute yoga sesh and generally feel like I’ve already achieved something afterwards. Then I get on with whatever I need to do. If I’m really tired or just meh I get mega caffeinated and buzz around the house for a bit. I do find that the yoga does help as it makes me focus and clears the head a bit. Also being nice to my body makes me feel good, and getting my heart rate up makes me feel more energised. It’s not for everyone but I’d recommend it.

Also, my mum always says that you can make your home look a lot tidier by just stacking clutter into aesthetically pleasing piles. Spray lemon Pledge around, put bleach down the toilet and fill the kitchen sink with hot water and washing up liquid and the place will look like you’re in the middle of a proper spring clean when in reality you’ve done almost F all. Good luck OP! Hope you feel better soon.

I've been really blue the last couple of weeks Umbongo, I feel your pain. The flat is a state, I'm nearly out of fresh clothes and all my (very limited) energy is currently going into self care to try and stop myself falling into a spell of proper depression yet a bloody gain. Dragging myself to and from work still but getting out of bed five minutes before I have to leave and getting into bed within five minutes of getting home.

I've given myself a little shake today and made a list of really simple things that I want to make sure are done every day:

• mornings: teeth cleaned, face washed and moisturised, make up on before leaving the house
• evenings: teeth cleaned, face washed and moisturised, clothes laid out clean and ready for tomorrow.

I'm also allocating myself one 'must be done' job a day to sneak in between arriving home and collapsing:
Monday: put a wash on
Tuesday: wipe down the kitchen
Wednesday: put things away
Thursday: wipe down the bathroom
Friday: free
Saturday: free
Sunday: hoovering, change sheets

It's a bit of a push (hoovering and changing sheets has been a shamefully long time) but I do know that I can't start to feel better until I do it. And I remind myself that my gorgeous cat is always fed on time, defleaed and given a clean litter tray, and I need to look after myself as well as I look after him!

I get like this at times it's really annoying because you do feel like you need a kick up the bum!
Try not to think of the entire task that needs doing, or you will just never get motivated. Take one bit of it (I.e put the washing on) and force yourself up to do that. Then once you've done that I usually find I can get onto the next task without too much trouble. But don't have it in your head you have to finish everything or it's a total demotivater!

Use a timer and do the things for 15 mins and have a 15 mins break. You will be surprised what gets done.

I can’t. Think it’s going to have to wait.

I know that feeling so well. I find a walk in the morning to get a blast of sunshine on my face really does lift my mood and gives me an instant burst of energy.

If it’s dark, rainy or too overcast for that to work, watch a couple of episodes of How Clean Is Your House, I find a couple of episodes in and I’m motivated to go clean.

Sometimes it’s good to be lazy, so start this new regime tomorrow.

I find when I'm at my most depressed, the best chance I have of an okay day comes from making sure that as soon as I wake up, before giving myself time to even think about it, I get straight out of bed and into the shower and make the bed and a cup of coffee.

Somehow, being up and clean can set the tone for the day and everything else seems more manageable. You don't put things off as easily 'because I need to get up and washed first' because it's already done. You can go out if you need to because you're already clean. If I let myself lie in bed past the alarm for even a few minutes I'll start realising how down I am and talk myself into staying in bed and 'being kind to myself'. When actually, even though staying in bed feels nice for a bit, it's the most unkind thing I can do to myself. Doing what feels unkind, like drinking a pint of water and showering and brushing my teeth and opening the curtains and going for a paper at the shops even if I don't need one, is actually the best thing for me. And allowing myself to lie around all day doing nothing is actually being a massive twat to myself and sabotaging my mood.

Have you ever looked into behavioural activation for depression? Sounds like it could be really helpful for you.

I count to 5.

put five things away.

if you feel better, try putting another 5 things away.

i also sometimes set my alarm for 20 minutes intervals. so sit down with a cup of tea for 20 minutes, and then force myself to put 5 items away. If i'm feeling a bit better, i force myself to do 10 items. sometimes i can only manage 3.

but sometimes I crash on the sofa and can only be bothered to have alpen for dinner. or only get up when the cats starts swiping at me because i haven't offered him fresh food in the last hour.