Can I have a big kick up the ass please

[NotUmbongoUnchained]

Whenever i get a bit depressed can’t seem to do anything. My diet goes bad, the house is a mess. I’m sat on the sofa under a blanket just staring at the tidying that needs doing and thinking about the beds that’s need changing and the washing needs doing.
What gets you motivated on days like this? I literally feel like I can’t move.

PS it doesn't always work! I still struggle. And have days where it's 10pm by the time I manage to get up and shower. But I know what does and doesn't work even if I don't always do it!

Have you had a shower?
Walk to the shop and buy food for dinner?
Put on one load of washing

I second the blitz type method others have suggested. Plan a treat - a coffee, chocolate, anything, then set a timer for 10 minutes and rush around doing whatever you can in that time. Don't think too much, just do! Definitely don't think about all the other stuff that needs doing. Then have your treat after the 10 minutes is up. I find that lifts my mood because I've beaten it, even if it's just for 10 minutes, then that energises me to do another 10 minutes. It also stops me getting bogged down in perfectionism or taking on too much or feeling like it is insurmountable.

I'm exactly the same, OP. One of the (many horrible) side-effects of my anti-depressants is apathy - in fact downright laziness, which isn't me at all really. The thing is, I'm not sure whether it's from the depression or the medication as depression makes you that way too. If you're innately very conscientious, you end up feeling guilty about all the things you should be doing but somehow can't, which doesn't exactly improve your mood. It's such a vicious circle. I'm sorry I can't help, only empathise.

When I feel like this I watch a couple of cleaning videos on YouTube and then I put some music on and get going.

I’ve made it upstairs but now I’m just lying on my bed

I really am a fucking baby atm.

Usually, when I feel like this I just think right I'm just going to put a wash on and see how I feel. Nearly everytime once the wash is in I feel like a weight has been lifted and I am much more relaxed. I then usually get back on the sofa with my blanket and a cuppa.

I then repeat with other little tasks. It takes me ages to do a few tasks but they get done and I feel better once they're done. I always start with the washing though because I think the sound of the machine spurs me on for some reason.

Anyone else who misread the word "kick" for something else when they saw the thread title?

🙈

Sometimes getting a shower feels as impossible as flying to the moon. But I never fail to be amazed by how much better I feel after. Even if I just shower and change into fresh pyjamas, I can then sort of enjoy doing nothing the rest of the day instead of feeling like I'm just procrastinating and knowing I'm sat there feeling gross.

Get a shower, wash your hair, fill up a bottle of water (1-2l) and commit to drinking it over the next hour or so. Text a friend and see how they are (looking outwards can help sometimes instead of inwards all the time). Open the curtains. Put some music on or a podcast you're interested in. Change your bedding so it's fresh when you get back into it.

For every 'I can't', try and think of a contrasting 'I can' even if you don't go through with it.

Just try. If you try and fail, fine. But don't avoid trying in case you fail, if that makes sense. Decide on three small things you can do in the next hour to improve your surroundings or how you're feeling. And give it a shot.

I always remind myself that if I don't do anything different nothing will change.

I always start with the washing though because I think the sound of the machine spurs me on for some reason.

Omg me too hah! It's so weird. It's like I know I'm passively doing housework so might as well carry on. And knowing there's an end to the washing cycle makes me want to do stuff until it's finished.

It's just a very lovely comforting sound.

Also, a very quick wipe around the sink and loo each day makes you feel like you’re doing something.
Try to do one room each evening, so kitchen wiped down, sink cleaned floor mopped on Monday. Laundry on.
Vacuum lounge on Tuesday, tidy up, dust, plump cushions.
Clean bathroom properly, vacuum upstairs on Wednesday.
Laundry and ironing on Thursday
Clean you bedroom, change sheets on a Friday knowing you can luxuriate in clean sheets the next morning with no work.

Make sure you buy healthy snacks and foods on your shopping day, but have some comfort food that arnt too bad. Fruit, yoghurt, flapjacks, breadsticks etc

Had a shower with DH this morning so I’m clean and dressed.
The food is where it all went wrong. I had something unhealthy and now I’m feeling disgusting and hateful.

I know that tidying the house and doing a workout is the only thing that will make me feel better, but I physically feel like I can’t move.

It’s me again, 👋.

Another good way to motivate myself is to either invite a mate round for coffee or wine, then I know I have to clean up or failing that, just pretending someone is coming can have the same motivational impact.

— I have even been known to make and star in an episode of How Clean is Your House, where I give Kim & Agie all my top tips, obviously this happens in my imagination only, —

Depression tells you you can't move, but it's a lie. You can move. You're in control of your own limbs and movement even though your brain is telling you you can't do anything about the way you're feeling.

What's worked in the past to snap out of this and do what you know makes you feel better?

I'm feeling much the same today. I had some regular medical treatment yesterday which makes me very tired and lethargic for a day or two, but my parents are coming to visit tomorrow so if dh and the dc (teens) aren't going to have to spend the whole evening cleaning I have to get on - unfortunately our cleaner comes on a Thursday!

I've washed and pegged out one load, and put the dishwasher on. And cleaned the toilet, not the whole room, just the pan.

Now need to
empty and reload dishwasher
tidy lounge, hoover and mop floor
wipe down kitchen surfaces, sweep and mop floor
hoover and mop hall floor
clean rest of downstairs loo.

I won't get it all done but can make a dent in it if I get off MN and actually DO it!
tidy kitchen, wipe

Invite people over for lunch/coffee whatever. It's the only time my house is tidy. Also get some music blaring while you're at it. I always feel so much better when the house is tidy..everything in it's place. Doesn't happen often mind ! Good luck ! X

Ive had a day like that. In fact, i went back to bed to contemplate:
my shit parenting skills
my fatness
my greed
my job hunting

then i had a lovely two hour nap. I woke up looking ancient.

I now have to mow the lawn, make soup and do some glossing, make dinner, entertain child guests and beg my husband to buy me some botox!!!.

The beds don’t need to be changed. They can wait. Most housework doesn’t desperately need to be done - you only have to do it again in a day or so anyway. If you can, and if it needs it, could you put the kitchen straight? Wipe down, load dishwasher/wash up.

Everything else can wait. And that can wait, too, if you don’t feel up to it.

The food is where it all went wrong. I had something unhealthy and now I’m feeling disgusting and hateful. Stop being unfair to yourself! Food isn't unhealthy in isolation, it's what your diet overall is like. If I'm having a bad day, I live on cereal, with the odd lump of marzipan. But overall I eat healthily, am fit for my age, and within the healthy weight range for my height.

If a friend of yours was in the same position, what would you be saying to her? I bet it'd be a lot more sympathetic. So now try being similarly sympathetic to yourself.

Download a really good audiobook to listen to while you’re doing the cleaning. Helps me to enjoy doing it every time!

I’ve managed to do upstairs. Wahooo

Yey!