About this erection situation....

[inmyshoos]

So in this situation ...

New relationship. Would you, when kissing/lying on top each other/touching through clothes etc assume that when you reach to touch him he would at that stage be erect? I'm guessing there might be a bit of erectile dysfunction but dont want to jump to conclusions. I've certainly never had this with any other partner but then that was pre marriage/divorce so would have been younger and so would the men!! He is 50s.
AIBU to think erection should be happening before having to 'work' on it or is this normal at this stage in life?

Are you actively touching him over clothes in order to know what's going on in the trouser dept?

Losing hair- if it's normal balding- is actually worse in men with high testosterone.

Age is pretty irrelevant. Men differ. DH is 63 and gets a hard on within seconds of us kissing or even my snuggling up to him in bed or on the sofa. He's very active- cycles, gym etc and blood supply is dependent on the arteries working! People think he looks 45-50 so health is a major contributor to erections.

If your partner is overweight, unfit, smokes etc that will all have an effect.
I think if he does have ED he ought to talk it over with you and seek help from GP. Most ED is purely psychological but older, unfit men may need a bit of a hand

I think that as men get older they need a bit more manual stimulation to gain an erection but everyone varies. I cannot say I am very knowledgeable, but I was told this by a chap in his sixties.

IME it's a completely individual thing, but generally as a man ages his ability to get and sustain an erection decreases.

My main client base is in the 40-60 bracket, occasionally I see a guy in his 70s or 80s. Guys in their 20s and 30s are usually hard by the time they knock on my door, and their problem is ejaculating too quickly.

In the 40s to 60s I'd say about 50% of guys are hard by the time we've finished undressing - but that would go from 75% of guys in their 40s, to 50% in their 50s, and 25% in the 60s.

Certain medical conditions can affect erections, as can the medications used to treat other conditions.

I have several older clients who cannot get an erection at all, but can still ejaculate. (I had no idea this was possible before starting sex work.)

Everyone is different. Sometimes just kissing is enough and other times a bit of stroking does the trick.

Having been with someone with ED was distressing for me. Presumably distressing for him too although he tried to off load it on to my blame.
I am now with someone else late 50s and all is well. I didn't realise how widespread a problem this was.

Definitely he needs to get his prostate checked

Worried about talking to him incase he doesnt feel there's a problem or is in denial about it.
I have openly discussed gynae issues I've had since giving birth so it's not like we haven't had open and frank conversations. I feel I've given him lots of opportunity to mention it. This makes me think hevwouldnt be open to me suggesting there's an issue.

smile I suppose part of a king on here was about making my mind up about whether or not there is actually a problem. It's certainly not something I have come across before but wondered if it was normal at his age. I don't want to discuss a problem that isn't actually a problem incase it makes a problem if that makes any sense!