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Not to want DH to get a motorbike?

36 replies

luciemule · 05/05/2007 20:34

My DH loves sports cars/any cars really and until DD was born, had a sports car. However he has now decided he wants to get a motorbike, which he rightly claims would be good for commuting (avoiding queues on a friday night) and would be cheap to buy/insure etc. I'm just worried he'll end up dead! He loves driving fast although does drive safely, especially when me and kids are in the car and doesn't usually go above 90 on his own (so he says). It's not just him though - it's other drivers not seeing him on a bike etc. Am I being daft as so many people have motorbikes? He says it'll be another regret he has if he doesn't buy one. He's only 34 so I doubt it's a mid-life crisis type thing.

OP posts:
lookcook · 06/05/2007 21:02

my bil was killed a few years ago as a driver did not see him while on his bike - he was only going 50mph and he died instantly - none of his organs were suitable for donation so this goes to show that wearing gear doesn't always save you - coming away from an accident without a scratch is pure luck

powder28 · 06/05/2007 21:07

Hmmm, bikes are good, but if you don't want him to have one then that should be the end of it.
He can get one in a few years time, there's no rush is there?

unknownrebelbang · 06/05/2007 21:14

Slightly off-topic, and anecdotal, but I know of one young lad who wanted a motorbike (dad had one).

Mum and Dad both encouraged him to wait until he'd passed his car driving test so that he'd have some sort of roadsense iykwim, sadly he got knocked off his pushbike in the meantime and was killed.

magicfarawaytree · 06/05/2007 21:18

tell him to wait until your children are 18. Better to regret not having a bike than tyour children to regret not having a father.

Rumpel · 06/05/2007 21:21

My Dh and I had motorbikes - I grew up with them and all my family have them, even my Gran. My Dh was a very very careful driver and we both had the best of gear - back protectors, leathers with armour plating, plated boots etc.

4 years ago he was out on his bike and a couple of tourists were on the wrong side of the road around a blind corner and hit him head on. Neither of them was doing mnore than 30mph. Hw wasnt expected to live and had serious head injuries, his vertebrae fractured in 5 places, multiple broken limbs, face smashed in and more. Luckily, the tourists were an A + E surgeon and another Dr. They managed to rescucitate him and keep him alive until the paramedic got there.

Thankfully he has made a remarkable recovery.

I love bikes and miss them terribly and so does he. I cant bring myself to sell mine yet but you just dont know. It is other drivers - if they cant see you in a big car you have no chance on a bike. If you have children I think it is selfish of him, if not he may always resent you if you dont let him. I would say he should get a small bike until he gets used to it and get the very best of protective gear. Unfortunateley life is a risk so you might just have to accept it.

TheBlonde · 06/05/2007 22:23

I would say you would be better off if he doesn't get one
My OH has one and used to commute by bike
It gets much less use now thankfully
As others have said the main hazard is other drivers

Chirpygirl · 07/05/2007 09:13

lookcook, That is awful, I am so sorry about your BIL. I wasn't trying to say that full gear will save you, I know too many bikers for that, I was just trying to bring some balance to the reports of accidents.

Sorry if I upset you.

JARM · 07/05/2007 09:20


I could NEVER let DH have a bike again, despite him seriously wanting one.

He had a little moped as a teenager and managed to wreck it on numerous occasions.

For me, the kids and me have to come first, and I cant take the risk of him being out on a bike knowing that he could end up dead so easily.

luciemule · 07/05/2007 09:49

Thanks for all your opinions guys - the last post I read from JARM made a lot of sense - the kids do come first in our lives and always will (for DH too) so perhaps if I explain to him that although I wouldn't mind in principle, I'd rather he didn't. We have so many plans for the future and it would seem stupid to put those in jepardy.
He did mention little hot hatches like the Clio Cup so I'll go along those lines and see if it works. I think he's determined though but I'd worry 24/7 if he got one. Also don't want it to influence kids into wanting them when they're older.

OP posts:
warthog · 07/05/2007 21:18

lucie, i had a bike before i got pregnant. it was my life. i absolutely loved every second and rode every day. i'm totally passionate about bikes. i love everything about them. but i had to give it up because it's a risk i don't have to take, and shouldn't take while i have dependants. it's not fair on my dh or my dd.

the trouble is not even other car drivers, but the unavoidable elements of nature - some gravel on a corner, a bit of diesel on the road, a misjudged corner.

70% of the people in the local neuro-disability clinic are bikers.

it's just not worth the risk.

duomonstermum · 10/05/2007 19:18

my dh got a bike 3yrs ago and it has been the best thing ever. we have kids so it wasn't an easy decision but ultimately it was his to make. he's been really sensible about it and chose a bike that wasn't too powerful and always wears the right gear. the local police force run a bikesafe scheme esp this week due to nw200 so he attends it every year. it is true that there are some bad bikers out there but there are some crap drivers who hate bikers so it's a matter of being aware. it has made him a better driver. i do worry when he goes out but i suppose he could be walking and get hit by a bus. what i'm trying to say is that life is short and you can only do your best to keep safe.

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