Not to want DH to get a motorbike?

[luciemule]

My DH loves sports cars/any cars really and until DD was born, had a sports car. However he has now decided he wants to get a motorbike, which he rightly claims would be good for commuting (avoiding queues on a friday night) and would be cheap to buy/insure etc. I'm just worried he'll end up dead! He loves driving fast although does drive safely, especially when me and kids are in the car and doesn't usually go above 90 on his own (so he says). It's not just him though - it's other drivers not seeing him on a bike etc. Am I being daft as so many people have motorbikes? He says it'll be another regret he has if he doesn't buy one. He's only 34 so I doubt it's a mid-life crisis type thing.

[duomonstermum]

my dh got a bike 3yrs ago and it has been the best thing ever. we have kids so it wasn't an easy decision but ultimately it was his to make. he's been really sensible about it and chose a bike that wasn't too powerful and always wears the right gear. the local police force run a bikesafe scheme esp this week due to nw200 so he attends it every year. it is true that there are some bad bikers out there but there are some crap drivers who hate bikers so it's a matter of being aware. it has made him a better driver. i do worry when he goes out but i suppose he could be walking and get hit by a bus. what i'm trying to say is that life is short and you can only do your best to keep safe.

[warthog]

lucie, i had a bike before i got pregnant. it was my life. i absolutely loved every second and rode every day. i'm totally passionate about bikes. i love everything about them. but i had to give it up because it's a risk i don't have to take, and shouldn't take while i have dependants. it's not fair on my dh or my dd.

the trouble is not even other car drivers, but the unavoidable elements of nature - some gravel on a corner, a bit of diesel on the road, a misjudged corner.

70% of the people in the local neuro-disability clinic are bikers.

it's just not worth the risk.

[luciemule]

Thanks for all your opinions guys - the last post I read from JARM made a lot of sense - the kids do come first in our lives and always will (for DH too) so perhaps if I explain to him that although I wouldn't mind in principle, I'd rather he didn't. We have so many plans for the future and it would seem stupid to put those in jepardy.
He did mention little hot hatches like the Clio Cup so I'll go along those lines and see if it works. I think he's determined though but I'd worry 24/7 if he got one. Also don't want it to influence kids into wanting them when they're older.

[JARM]

NO NO NO

I could NEVER let DH have a bike again, despite him seriously wanting one.

He had a little moped as a teenager and managed to wreck it on numerous occasions.

For me, the kids and me have to come first, and I cant take the risk of him being out on a bike knowing that he could end up dead so easily.

[Chirpygirl]

lookcook, That is awful, I am so sorry about your BIL. I wasn't trying to say that full gear will save you, I know too many bikers for that, I was just trying to bring some balance to the reports of accidents.

Sorry if I upset you.

[TheBlonde]

I would say you would be better off if he doesn't get one
My OH has one and used to commute by bike
It gets much less use now thankfully
As others have said the main hazard is other drivers

[Rumpel]

My Dh and I had motorbikes - I grew up with them and all my family have them, even my Gran. My Dh was a very very careful driver and we both had the best of gear - back protectors, leathers with armour plating, plated boots etc.

4 years ago he was out on his bike and a couple of tourists were on the wrong side of the road around a blind corner and hit him head on. Neither of them was doing mnore than 30mph. Hw wasnt expected to live and had serious head injuries, his vertebrae fractured in 5 places, multiple broken limbs, face smashed in and more. Luckily, the tourists were an A + E surgeon and another Dr. They managed to rescucitate him and keep him alive until the paramedic got there.

Thankfully he has made a remarkable recovery.

I love bikes and miss them terribly and so does he. I cant bring myself to sell mine yet but you just dont know. It is other drivers - if they cant see you in a big car you have no chance on a bike. If you have children I think it is selfish of him, if not he may always resent you if you dont let him. I would say he should get a small bike until he gets used to it and get the very best of protective gear. Unfortunateley life is a risk so you might just have to accept it.

[magicfarawaytree]

tell him to wait until your children are 18. Better to regret not having a bike than tyour children to regret not having a father.

[unknownrebelbang]

Slightly off-topic, and anecdotal, but I know of one young lad who wanted a motorbike (dad had one).

Mum and Dad both encouraged him to wait until he'd passed his car driving test so that he'd have some sort of roadsense iykwim, sadly he got knocked off his pushbike in the meantime and was killed.

[powder28]

Hmmm, bikes are good, but if you don't want him to have one then that should be the end of it.
He can get one in a few years time, there's no rush is there?

[lookcook]

my bil was killed a few years ago as a driver did not see him while on his bike - he was only going 50mph and he died instantly - none of his organs were suitable for donation so this goes to show that wearing gear doesn't always save you - coming away from an accident without a scratch is pure luck

[Aloha]

I would be very upset and terrified. I once went to an amputees ward at Roehampton, and everyone there over 60 had lost a limb due to smoking, and everyone under 60 (pretty much) had lost their in a motorbike accident. I don't know what the answer is, but I would share your concern. My dh has an ordinary bike, and I worry enough about that tbh.

[yellowrose]

lucie - i have a terrible fear of them and do not look forward to the day ds may one day pester me for one. if he does, he will be told in no uncertian terms that if he gets one, he will never see me again. sounds extreme, but my cousin was killed in collision with a car coming the opposite direction. he was a very intelligent, talents 18 year old on his way to becoming a pilot. my aunt's only child. i can not tell you the grief i have seen my aunt and family go thro.

sorry for the tragic personal story, but i do feel strongly about it and do not see why ANY man needs a fast sports car or big bike. they should have more consideration for their loved ones.

my cousin was a stubborn old goat, my brother tried to talk him out of buying one, he bought it while my aunt was living abroad, it was too big and fast for his frame (i think it was a massive BMW one he attached a side car to it which must have made it even more unstable). he was killed instantly as his helmet came off. the driver of the car was VERY seriously injured but survived. don't think the poor man will ever forget the experience tho' it was not his fault at all. my cousin's motorbike veered off course.

[DANCESwithaFewExtraPounds]

I taught a little girl (6yrs) whose dad was killed in a motorcycle accident. It was so hard for her, her mum kept her out of school the day we made father's day cards as it was too raw Also a family member is a surgeon, he has told us some horror stories about motorcyclists...
Please try to dissuade him.

[pointydog]

I just feel cross he drives at 90mph.

[hoolagirl]

I deal with RTA claims and there is always a sharp rise in numbers of motorcycle claims in the summer months.
In 99.99% of the claims, the motorist has simply not seen the bike, the risk of serious injury is very very high.
My DP would also love to get another motorbike, but everyday I have some horror story to tell him about another new claim that has come in, thankfully it seems to be putting him off.

[PeterAndreFanCLub]

and alos they never wear white helmets as they are supposed to

[PeterAndreFanCLub]

shite idea
we had a deth of a mortorcylcis in court
i think his head was spereated form his body

[Chirpygirl]

DH's mate has just been hit by a car that pulled out in front of him.
He wasn't speeding, he was wearing full gear and apparently went flying and the bike is not in good shape BUT he has not a scratch on him.

This is why I insist DH wears full and proper gear! And wanted to reassure luciemule that not all bike accidents are serious.

[ThePrisoner]

My dh has a motorbike now, used purely for playing with. He is no longer the boy racer he apparently was in his youth (before my time).

I don't worry about him doing something silly, but I worry about other road-users. I also used to have a motorbike, was definitely not a "boy racer", and I was hit by a stupid driver. Luckily, I survived - but it obviously makes me worried about dh.

Much as I now dislike bikes, I don't think it would have been fair for me to say to a grown man that he couldn't have one. I wouldn't like him to dictate what hobbies I could or couldn't have.

[unknownrebelbang]

I understand your concerns, but would love my DH to get another bike.

Him being out on his bike is something I've never worried about.

[Shoshable]

My Dh does this for a living but I hate him going out on the
road.

[luciemule]

In that case, I'm going off the idea. I do hear about horrific accidents and as you all say, it's the car drivers a lot of the time, although there are some really stupid bikers too (overtaking on double solid lines for example!)

[luciemule]

In that case, I'm going off the idea. I do hear about horrific accidents and as you all say, it's the car drivers a lot of the time, although there are some really stupid bikers too (overtaking on double solid lines for example!)

[weepootleflump]

My dh has a bike as well and though I worry, I know he is a great rider and very careful but as you says it's car drivers you have to worry about - people are just not bike aware in this country.

My dh uses his for commuting and assures me that there are very few bike accidents involving commuters, most of them are the 'fair weather riders' who only get their bikes out to play on at weekends throughout the summer.

Let him have it, don't have him hold it against you. I think the track course is a brilliant idea, wish I'd known about that before dh's birthday - I'd definitely have bought him that.