Gower school discussion 2

[squeezylemons]

Continuation of www.mumsnet.com/Talk/education/1835481-Gower-school-islington?pg=20&order=

Did you mean to post this in AIBU? Also, threads can hand up to 1000 posts so plenty of room left on the old one!

Maybe we should arrange a coffee morning and all meet. Is that crazy? But it might soften the conversation between us when you see the human you are responding to. Maybe just as a one off? Then continue back here.

I think that's a fantastic idea @facetothesun however this has been attempted in the past by previous posters and was even put in writing to EG to see if some form of discussion/PTA could help the situation however was quickly dismissed.

I even recall that many parents were called in separately to speak with senior leaders but EG wouldn't see the group as a whole. Hence the preferential treatment.

Also, some people on the thread are actually ex-staff members or current staff members who see the forum as a space to speak freely without being judged/reprimanded.

No sorry didn’t mean to post in AIBU. I thought only 20 pages max, or is it 40?

Yep sorry it is 40 pages! We can go back to old one, sorry for being too quick!!!

I see @cupcakeking. Well if we can’t share our identities here, we could still all meet for coffee.

I’ve found posting my experience a slightly nerve wracking decision , because positive experiences are often met with a degree of hostility and suspicion. Maybe you have good reasons considering your experience. But its not very nice to being on the receiving end of it. Especially when you are posting a honest account which took some self talk to do.

I’m happy to prove who I am. Maybe a coffee get together with a few of us would be helpful. My experience and that of my child has been wonderful. Maybe things are changing? I know lots of happy parents. I wanted to share that with people reading this, as equally as you wish to share your difficult experience.

I’m up for us all meeting, at least to end suspicion and engage in a healthy open, trusting conversation within this space.

Do you know who the governor of the gower school is? EG's father! Why does she make herself accountable to no-one? Wake-up, people!

Without outside governors there is no healthy, open trusting conversation. Open your eyes.

@pleasant, I meant among us, nothing to do with EG. My post was met with suspicion and it does get a bit nasty on here from time to time.

There a lot of regular posters, I thought if we all met we could put suspicion to one side and give more room to each others very different views. This was nothing to do with forming a governing body. Though I agree that would be wonderful, but not the point that I was trying to make.

I'd like to be able to post my opinion and not face such hostility and suspicion. I'm really happy to meet with anyone.

I think it's very easy to forget that there is a human sitting behind the screen, it's just the nature of social media, but that doesn't make it any easier. To sit and have a coffee with someone face to face well that changes the quality of the communication. I'd like to understand how there are people having such an awful time when this is not on my radar when I am the school or that of the parents I know. Hope that makes more sense?

Sorry meant @pleasant6, not @pleasant...please read previous post :)

@facetothesun
I appreciate your well meaning posts. I have been following the longer thread since it started and have been a parent at the school for even longer.

While your intention to reach across the divide displayed here is admirable, you will not be able to change opinions. The parents who have strong negative feelings about the school all know that there are some amazing teachers and happy children in well resourced classrooms.
This experience may - up to a point - for some of us make up for individual unhappy stories we hear about - of teachers being treated unfairly, maybe even children and families too. Stories we may hear, directly or through others, but it is possible to find excuses and reasons for them.
However, it can surely never make up for the fact that children are openly called names by senior staff (not teachers), without consequences, and children are talked to in a questionable manner, undermining their confidence or downright inappropriate, in a way I would never speak to my child. Please do not just assume these are made up by people who bear a grudge. Personally I had been a supporter of the school for many years. These instances are reported to us by the children, repeatedly and separately. They are not made up. Trust the children. And yes, it may have gotten worse over the years and yes, this may not - yet - affect children in the younger age groups but it is a reality of the school and will ultimately affect all children.

@123yellowblue thank you for your message. I have been reflecting on the more recent posts and I need to know if they are genuine so I ask those recent posters a question which won’t effect their anominity and will prove they are current. (This question is for the person/s saying children are called morons.)

Here’s the question: What rather special thing stood out to you about the first performance at the Gower Christian concert in the church this year?

I would expect a speedy response in order to ensure it’s genuine. These are our children so I in making such recent claims I want to know what’s real for sure.

I absolutely cannot match these two worlds and well meaning, etc I want to know how it’s possible that these claims are being made when as I’ve said before myself and my patent friends at the school do not experience this. If it’s true I want to know. So the question may seem weird but let’s get to the bottom of this.

Not Christian...

@facetothesun I'm really sorry but I'm not sure what you mean by what stood out for me - I guess you mean the Christmas concert, and is it a particular occurrence you are referring to during the concert? I have been to a few of these, so not quite sure. The concert was lovely, as always. But please be assured, I'm genuine - and truly concerned about what is happening - and I am more than happy to find a way to meet in person or answer any further questions.

Also, I was very nervous about posting on here as the vibe feels hostile to positive experiences. Eventually I had that awful hostility directed at me which was just horrible. It’s the very behaviour everyone is rightly if true up in arms about at The Gower.

My focus has gone there in some of my replies because, come on it’s ironic...

I did not receive an apology or just an acknowledgment from the person being rude and bullish and whilst everyone else has since remained polite but steadfast in their points, none of you have acknowledged it. You’ve all ignored that point regarding bullying here. Considering the topic of discussion I would have hoped for a very different outcome. Some people are presenting the very hostility they say happens at the Gower.

I get people feel strongly but if it’s been pointed out that someone has experience a horrible interaction on this page, with all the concerned parents and staff I would expect people to self reflect and not go silent. I think it’s particularly relevant because of the topic of discussion.

@123yellowblue tell me about the very first performance and not something that happened. It was beautiful to see. Tell me why might I say that?

@facetothesun positive experiences do get a lot a negative feedback, you’re right. The reason being is that so many can’t believe the negative experiences and feel they need to disprove what others have been through. Because of this many become defensive. This thread is very much real. All of the comments are true, whether or not some have experienced or not. A lot of positives on this thread were actually obviously written by EG herself, so many are weary about certain posters.
Regarding the concert, it is an easy way for someone to out themselves if they comment.
Regardless of people’s experiences on here. There are something’s that cannot be disputed. No PTA. Huge staff turnover etc. All these are huge alarm bells.

As for the question you could not possibly out yourself by answering it. There were probably 100 people in attendance who would have seen the same thing. And although my question seems vague to a person who wasn’t there anyone who was there would know exactly what I am talking about without a second thought. Eventually if needed I’ll say what it was to prove anyone could have easily answered without fear.

Exactly. 100 people. You may not think it’s outing but I very much do!

Thanks for proving what I needed. When I post the answer you will kick yourself.

The statements being made here are very serious and I’ve given people a great opportunity to prove I can trust them. When I say the answer there is nothing about it that could out who I am, absolutely nothing and if you knew the answer you’d agree... it’s impossible to out yourself by answering this question and those that know the answer know that...

My point regarding bullying still stands. There’s no justification. I think it’s pretty obvious that I’m a genuine parent. And as that was realised not one person stepped forward to acknowledge my experience or apologise. From that point of realisation comments about EG posting and trust issues become irrelevant.

It’s quite relevant.
A more important question is why do you want to know who the people are? There are quite a few posters. Why would someone with no relevance or experience from the gower post on a thread like this, a thread which has been active for years? So many lying? Really?
The whole point of mumsnet is anonymity!
You seem to be too invested in wanting to know who the posters are. You have the right to your anonymity as do we.
Parents on this thread have most likely raised their concerns with EG. As usual she has turned a blind eye, so the parents have turned to MN.

@facetothesun
I really wish I knew what you are referring to. I’m sure it’s one of these things where I’ll be “of course!” were I to find out. I’m wrecking my brain but please be aware the concerts blur a bit if you’ve been to many. And it may be different if you have different age children? Also I sat upstairs. Any other “proof“ i could supply?

@123 you don’t need to prove yourself. Describing whether or not you were at the concert will allow someone to know whether you are a current parent/ex parent/ member of staff/ex member of staff. Either way the concerns are real and does not matter who we are. Why should who we are have any relevance?