To think we waste every weekend!!!

[Khloe99]

It drives me crazy but every weekend we do nothing! I love my life I have an amazing dh and 3 lovely dd’s and Monday - Friday it’s fine we’re busy and living everyday life but dh works away a lot so is never at home on the weekends and we seem to spend all day just laying about, dd’s are 13,7,2 so trying to find something they all want to do I’d almost impossible so they usually fight over the telly all day or sit staring at their iPad, when I was young my mum and dad always took me and my brother places and kept us busy without technology but now everything costs so much and the kids aren’t interested anyway. What does everyone else do at the weekends?

Mine are 12 and 10 and our weekends are mostly taken up with watching them playing sport (rugby in winter and cricket in summer) - lots of toddler siblings around wAtching too or ferrying them to and from friends houses. We go out for walks (not always popular but happy enough once we get out) or out on bikes.

Couldn't the 13 year old go off with their friends the same age, leaving you to take the two little ones on suitable activities? When I was 13, I used to go to swimming or tennis at the weekend, or walk the couple of miles to the public library by myself. They'll very soon be of an age where they won't want to be seen dead with their parent anyway!
There are lots of cheap or free things to do with the younger two - parks, country walks, beaches, museums, children's sessions at libraries, picnics, even just games in the garden. It depends a bit where you live - I was lucky to raise my two in a Scottish village, in a major tourist area, but even industrial towns can have good activities. Check your local paper for kids events and council play schemes etc. You may find you really enjoy having fun and educational quality time with them. My two have lots of fond memories of outings, and we often revisit favourite places now they're adults.

We've done nothing a couple of weekends. Really don't care! The weather is awful and everything costs loads, is rubbish and packed to the gills. The joys of south east living 😮
Suppose we'll go out in spring but the overpriced crap and overcrowded problem remains.
My dd is happiest with a mate, out in summer or on pc in winter listening to music.
She hates national trust, walks etc. She only likes activities with a mate so again with the costs, staying in is fab.

We have DDs 14 and 17. Trouble is now DD17 works at weekends, all different shifts and no public transport so we have to fetch and carry and then the dog needs 2 walks so we fit in around that schedule really. We do like to relax at the weekend but always get out for dog walks(DH and I) teens are reluctant to join us even though they wanted the dog!! it all gets easier in the warmer months, sort of. I think it's called life.

Half the problem is that you have a 2 year old, OP (bitter emoticon).

Today we were bimbling around in a local field, and the 8 year old said "Can we go on a really long walk, mum?" I was like "There's nothing I'd like better son, but you know that within 100 metres your brother will have sat down suddenly in a puddle/ got stuck in sucking mud/ have got water in his wellies and will be screaming to go home".

See also "having lovely sledgy snowy fun ruined by toddler with cold feet after 10 minutes".

See also doing absolutely fucking anything whatsoever.

It's been a long 5 days......

We do always have nice meals together at the weekend though and sometimes watch a film or play a game. DDs sometimes meet up with friends though not as much as I did at their age and that makes me sad as some kids have a timetabled weekend that doesn't allow for casual hanging out.The best bit is that now we can go out and leave them to their screens if that's what they want, so shopping trips and DIY gets easier without kids.

OP maybe try to alternate weekend activities with the older then younger DC. Do you have any family or friend that could help near?

It's funny you posted about this OP, I was wondering about the same thing earlier. I gave blood today and the lady taking my blood asked if I had plans for the rest of the day. I said I was going to look around a shop which I was given vouchers for at Christmas, then go home and make dinner. It sounded a bit lame, really.

My DC are teens, one works in the week and will be in or out or seeing his GF. The other is in sixth form at school but needs transporting to weekend job, boyfriend's house, parties, doesn't drive yet. It's difficult to know how many to cook for on any given day, and can't make too many plans. DC are not spending time with us at this stage i.e. not hanging out with us. They might eat with us though !

I like to walk to the pub with DH for a beer , or go to a garden centre for a mooch around and eat there. If you both work I think weekends are important for relaxing, I don't want them filled up with lots of things to do. I also like spontaneity.

You could probably leave DD13 for a couple of hours while you take the younger 2 to the park etc, then spend time with her if family can mind the other 2 for a bit.

My DH and I are the same and I agree with those who write that it’s down to the weather. Everyone in our street hibernates during the winter but when the weather gets warmer we all come out. Museums are great for winter activities and most of them have children’s programmes.

Get a dog! There are lots of tunes that we are in the same situation as you, but the dog has got to be walked so we all go out (unless it’s tipping it down). Every single time without fail, we all enjoy the walk and have fun playing games and chatting. It’s refreshing and good for you. Obviously I was joking and you shouldn’t get a dog just for this reason, but it definitely keeps us motivated to get out of the house and have some fun without any tv or phones involved

At the moment I work Saturday and Sunday all day so weekends are like other days. We do make the effort to see friends/go to pub etc in the evenings, otherwise I would have no social life whatsoever.
However when I lived in London and worked mon-fri I used to do stuff on Saturdays (usually museum/gallery/exhibition) and then potter about/walk/pub/shopping on Sunday.
I miss those days.

Saturday morning means swimming lessons but we often do things after that as DH and DD are back by 11am. Either I join them and we go straight or we leave after an early lunch. That can be a trip to a NT site (membership is helpful if you have lots of places around), maybe cinema, going in London by train straight from the pool.

Every other Sunday DD is at the riding stable full day and she has various Scout activities on Sundays as well.

Luckily her homework has to be done uder the week since Y6, no more tears and tantrums.

It is easier when Spring comes, when we stay at home I try to minimise electronics by baking, playing board games.

I also hope that with secondary school DD May start going out to see friends on her own.

My DP works away all week so we try to make sure we have some quality family time at the weekends as well as getting all the usual household chores done. My DCs are 3 & 4 months. DS loves a trip to Costa at the weekend, we go for a walk round the park & feed the ducks first & it can take up a couple of hours in total. We have national trust membership which is really good value if you have somewhere close. Our nearest one has an amazing play area & DS would happily spend all day there. We take picnics in the summer to keep costs down. Probably not for the older ones but we go to the local garden centre & look at all of the fish & tropical pets & have a drink. We do a trip to the seaside every couple of months, normally just a nice walk & play in the beach if weather allows, normally with a picnic again.

We try & do something fun every day even if it's for an hour. DS has swimming at 9.30 on a Saturday which is great for getting us up & about. DP would happily lounge round the house all day but after being in most of the week I love getting out at the weekend.

We have two dc, one 14 and one 6 (youngest has autism) and we always get out both days. The thought of staying in all day fills me with horror. We are lucky enough to live within walking distance of a nice park and supermarkets etc so we normally let the littlest one run round the park for a while and then go to the supermarket and get a few treat things for later on. The teenager seems to always want to come with us, unless one of her friends asks her out somewhere instead.

If we’re not doing that and we have a little more money to spend we will go for a McDonald’s together and a run round the park near the one we go to, or we will go to the cinema or a touristy type thing.

I completely know where you come from. We have 3ds and one on the way! Since last summer I have complaining to do that we barely go out any more. I mean making memories. Kids are busy with parties, football but at the end of the weekend I feel what a waste of couple of days it has been. In a way I much preferred when kids were smaller and we just forced ourselves out the house as it was too small for us. Since we moved we spend so much more at home but feel we do nothing. Dp is just like yours and away a lot and at weekend he says he doesn’t particularly want to go other a lot. Today was an especially bad day and i slightly lost it this afternoon with them all and in anger I booked a Lego land weekend away and promised myself that I will make arrangements from now that way there is no turning back. Dp was actually happy about it and said he would prefer me to plan ahead and tell him in advance. So from now on I will be making sure I plan at least a 2-3 hrs of outing a weekend. I’m desperate to use my national trust passes too so can’t wait!! Sorry for going on but when I saw your post I thought that’s me!!

The last couple of weekends we have done (aside from normal grocery shop etc.):
pottery cafe
kids rave
baked a chocolate cake
planted flowers in pots for the garden
board games
picked new fabric to cover a dining bench
written to pen pal in foreign country
movie and popcorn night
spring cleaning (ie sorting out old/broken/wrong age toys)
sold toys on Facebook marketplace
toyshop for new toys
playpark/walk and pub lunch with friends

Weekends are never long enough :(

You don't have to be out doing stuff all the time. We do fuck all at the weekends but they aren't wasted. We have football training on sat mornings, but other than that we don't do much. Occasionally the cinema, sometimes visiting family, but often its watching movies at home and playing games and chilling out together. What's wrong with that? It's not a waste, spending time together at home.

We go for looooong walks in the countryside/on the coast/nature reserves/poke around in medieval churches and ruins/visit secondhand bookshops/go to see the seals at the coast/go to the arcades in seaside resorts and spend a fiver on the 2p machines... and then go for a pub lunch. For some reason, they both love bus or train journeys (I don't drive). If the weather's rubbish, we just go to the pub instead

They do need to be booted up the arse to do it though - they'll whinge about going, but once we're out they enjoy it. I can't always be arsed to boot them at times, to be honest, so we end up with a weekend of barely leaving the house...

MistyMeena - we have 3 dogs!!! And guess who gets to walk them twice a day? Not my little princesses who can’t get mud on their new shoes lol 🙄

We had a static caravan when ours were that age so we'd ship ourselves down there for weekends/half terms etc, the kids would go off and find their campsite friends and me and Dh would chill.

It was a godsend cos Dh had/has a very stressful job enforced chill out time helped him reconnect.

We also had gym membership so when the weather was too bad to go to the campsite we'd take them to hit balls on the tennis courts then go to the pool. Made up games I was "shark mum", we went swimming so much DD was swimming by 4 yo without armbands no style at all looked like a bobbing cork but she was going

We used to take them for walks in local woodland, there were proper paths so we'd take their bikes and they'd go on ahead of us turn around come back to us then go off again. When we got the dog we went in all weathers.

Also took them to rugby matches, they're grown ups now they still come to the rugby with us, they have their own season tickets.

If Dh was away with work on weekends in the summer me and the kids would take ourselves off to the beach, pack a picnic, flask of coffee, umbrella for shade ... free day out. Dh used to moan about how much sand was in the car

Having a family National Trust membership has transformed our weekends! We ask for it for Christmas each year from parents and it's a whole year of free and unlimited days out. We've been members for two years and go all the time and we still find new places to go to. There are different properties too - loads that are dog-friendly, some with stately homes/interesting buildings and some with just lovely walks and sometimes with all of the above.

I think it is unlikely you'll find anything much that is really going to engage a 13, 7, and 2 yr old.
We have always encouraged our dc to find their own interests and then supported them in those.
Tend to take up quite a lot of the weekend.
Then they do enjoy the occasional time that isn't 'forced'.

If you are busy during the week I don't think it is a problem that you relax at home on the weekend as long as you are all happy.
We have 4 DC between 5-13. Often we are busy with sporting activities especially for the top two. Littlest has a swimming lesson on a Saturday morning too.
We are very social so spend a lot of time hanging out with friends either out and about or at someone's house. We are also very active so most weekends we will either all go swimming or for a bike ride or walk. We have always done this and it's something that is not age dependent. If we are at home top two like to bake but I don't begrudge any of them a bit of screen time because they don't have it at all in the week.

Thanks for all the ideas and reply’s. Dd 13 is probably the easiest tbh but she has problems with her legs so can’t walk very far and doesn’t like going out on her own but will happily stay at home for a few hours especially if one of her friends comes round but I feel bad just leaving her there. It’s the sassy 7 year old I have problems with everything is boring or too much effort - she hates the 13 year old because she gets too much of my attention, she hates the 2 year old who needs my attention. I think we just got the age gaps all wrong