AIBU to consider 2+ hour each way commute to dream job?

[Enni2S]

The situation is as follows. I'm married with no DC and live with DH in an owned home. I have recently been offered a job I've wanted for years, but it is split between 2 locations, which are both 2+ hours away from my house (in different directions). My potential new employer is willing to let me work from 2 days a week, and would cover travel costs for one of the locations. My commute would look something like this:

Mon - 2.5 hour each way train journey (work on train allowed)
Tue/Wed - 2 hour each way drive
Thu/Fri - work from home

Moving is not an option for DH due to his job, but he fully supports me getting a flat somewhere closer to new job. I just really love where I live so would prefer not to move if possible.

AIBU to want to try this? Has anyone done something similar and survived?

Honestly I think it would burn you out no matter how much you thought it was your dream job.

Depends what time of day traveling takes place

Could you get an air bag over night if you work in the same office two days running?

Airbnb nit airbag

I used to do 3h each way to my dream job (working on train allowed) and then 2 days per week from home. Continued for 3 years, through 2 pregnancies. It was tough but doable —and could sometimes sleep the whole way home whilst pregnant—

The killer for me would be 2h drive each way twice a week. That would be exhausting.

It could be doable. You could put something on the notice board that you wanted lodgings for Tuesday night. There will be someone I’d think.

Possible if you spend 1 or 2 nights in a hotel. Is it well paid enough to allow this?

I'd do it in your shoes. I travel 90mins each way, 4 or 5 days a week. I'm a single parent, it's the having kids and day to day stuff that's hard going but if you have 2 days working from home that would kind of make up for it.

I would take it but only if the tues/weds was at the same location so would do a hotel that night and only have travel tues am and weds pm
I travel quite a bit for my job and quite enjoy a night away from home - I actually get a bit of me time

I think that’s doable. I did a two hour commute (five days a week) for years and it was fine. I was younger though - I don’t think I could do it now.

I did a 2h each way commute 4 days a week for 7 years. It was ok, definitely do-able, especially if you can work on the train and wfh 2 days a week.

How long a working day will you have? For me, it meant I was out of the house between 6 am and 6:30 but if your working day finishes later that needs to be considered too.

I now work a 15 minute drive away but I often miss the hour or so I had on the train in the morning, coffee, a book, bliss.

I do a 2 hour commute each way three to new a week, work from home the other two days. I have a young child. It’s fine. Im knackered but that’s the yoimg child. Pre-child I did it 5 days a week and it wasn’t a problem at all.

I'd go for it - if it is too much then the flat's a back-up option.

To me, whether a job is a good job is not solely about the type of work it involves. A job that involved a 2+ hours commute would never be categorised as a "dream job".

Practically can you work on the train? Is there a guarantee of a seat every day and space to put your laptop etc? Is your work confidential such that there may be an issue with other passengers seeing what you're doing?

The two days working from home will help a lot but do think about what the average journey time will actually turn out to be - is it 2.5 hours if all the trains run to time, what is the journey either end from the station etc. Similarly is it 2 hours at rush hour by car and are there good alternative routes if eg a motorway is closed. Another thing to conisder is the actual hours expected of you. If you can leave the house at 7, start dead on 9, leave bang on 5pm and be home by 7 then that's not too bad.

I've done long commutes for work at various times and it does grind you down after a while but if it's only 3 days and you perhaps have the option to stay over the Tuesday night then it could be doable.

If you are classed as a home worker they should pay the costs of all your travel.
I would do it, even if just for a while if it is your dream job and can enhance your CV

I already do this. I live 3.5 hours away from my office base. I work from home Mondays and Fridays. Tuesdays I get up at 5am, travel to office, arrive at 9. I then stay overnight Tuesday and Wednesday nights close to the office. Thursday evening I travel home. It works well for our family.

I stay overnight at one of a couple of Airbnb places near the office that I now know very well. When I first got the job (also a dream job for me) I tried out a few different Airbnb places and now have a network of people I know near the office who have become good friends and rent out their spare rooms to me as and when I need it.

It works well for us as I get time to myself to totally focus on work mid-week, and then more flexible time when I work from home to combine household stuff and picking up DS from school. Only works because DH is also happy to be a lone parent 3 days a week and has a job with flexibility for the school runs on those days.

It means we really appreciate the family time together Friday to Monday and also it means DS has a closer relationship with DH than before I took the job 2 years ago....they spend more 1:1 time together and DH is more hands-on with all the domestic and childcare tasks.

Could you rent a room in a house for the night away?

Thank you for your replies. I would not be classed as a home worker, that is why I can only do two days a week at home max.

I'm definitely considering staying overnight if that is the best option. My work hours allow me to dodge rush hour, as I'm allowed flexible start/finish times. I would always have a seat on the train as it would be pre-booked for me.

Financially I can afford staying in a hotel, but I'm worried what that will do to my sanity. I wish there was a way to do the 2h drive by train, but alas national rail is not the best.

Are you prepared to lose your evenings? If you do a lot of activities/ socialising in the week that is what you will be sacrificing.

Are DC in your future?

Yes i’d Do it for a dream job only three days a week. Used to commute 2 hrs pretty much door to door 5 days a week for a definitely not dream job but to live where I wanted to be.

I would do it if the money was great and it would enhance your career.

But I'd only do it for 2 or 3 years.

It could do wonders for your sanity! One night a week in a hotel is great. Room service, long hot shower, fake tan and nails, reading and tv and Internet and admin catch up, lie in and no long commute and arrive early in work.

Depends how long your hours are. I work on average 9am - 9pm with a 45 minute commute each way. A two hour commmute would rip me over the edge - but if your job is 9 - 6 it would probably be fine.

For eight years I did a 2.5/3 hr commute to work (each way). It meant leaving the house at 5.30 am, catching a bus and two trains and possibly a bus at the other end (depending on which site I worked). I did not arrive home until 8-8.30pm.

I learnt to work on the bus and the train (providing I could get a seat), but often I fell to sleep. Missed connections, train cancellations, stolen cables and so on really disrupted my day and meant I relied heavily on colleagues to hold the fort for me if I was going to be late.

I loved my job, but I was fed up with being the one who had traveled the furthest, prepared the most, but still arrived late. I also found it impossible to socialise after work.

Yet, what really caused me to stop the lengthy commute was the time I spent away from my children. They were young teenagers with SEN and I never seemed to be there for them.