'Clothes are cheap these days, no need for second hand'

[Upsidedownandinsideout]

Just read this exact phrase on a current thread re FB selling groups but see it again and again on here.

Am no saint, I still buy things from Zara as well as preowned, and haven't darned a sock in my life. Still I worry that if even the members here, who generally work hard to do the best for our kids and worry about their futures, think nothing of buying new school trousers every growth spurt instead of taking up or down, or buy a new costume (flown from China) every year for World Book Day, or can't see the point in bothering to sell a second hand item - that's not a great sign for the future of our environment, especially when our fast fashion industry means that there increasingly isn't much value in donated clothes either.

Realistically though, AIBU to even spend time worrying about this? I feel like a (small, full-time-working and time- and money-poor) drop in a very large ocean every time I think about these things.

I think they have a duty to make their seconds affordable for those with limited disposable income.

Surely their "duty" is to raise as much money as possible for the cause.

Well yes, if they have an exceptionally rare or expensive item then of course they should sell it for as much as possible. But If they’re pricing second had clothes at what they would nearly cost new it’s just stupid as they stay on the rack for months. I’m not sure who they think the market is for that. This is often the case in my local charity shop.

My village has an amazing Reuse FB Page, everything is free. I've had so much stuff for my DS off there, barely worn clothes, toys, a garden slide etc. Also given away things that we no longer need but other people do. It's amazing and saves so much money as well as reducing waste.

Surely their "duty" is to raise as much money as possible for the cause

You are right but its really come to something when poor people are priced out of buying second hand.

IME its the poor who get criticised the most for ruining the environment with their cheap food, cheap clothes, wish to be warm and their otherwise wasteful ways.

Being eco friendly seems to be yet another way of signalling class.
'We buy ethically sourced clothing. I would rather buy two school sweatshirts at £25 each than five for fifty'

Yes well that is super but quite a few people can only buy two for a tenner and make them last regardless of the quality and provenance.

Its SO much easier to be ethical when you are comfortable. Its easy to want less when you already have everything you need.

We are already seeing schools and communities having to provide clothing that is not 'fun' and readily available second hand. Shoes and coats and uniforms for example.

I think people are making too much of 'quality'. There is very little difference between Primark quality and shops further up the high street chain.
You have to spend a lot more to get to the point where clothes are 'quality'

I know a lot about clothes. I have been obsessed all my life. I can spot a decent bit of fabric and a good seam a mile off. There really isn't much to chose between Peacocks and Oasis.
Jaeger (RIP) and Peacocks, lots. But you can't expect people to save up to buy a darling polka dot silk blouse when what they need is a pair of joggers for their 7 year old.

Well yes, if they have an exceptionally rare or expensive item then of course they should sell it for as much as possible. But If they’re pricing second had clothes at what they would nearly cost new it’s just stupid as they stay on the rack for months. I’m not sure who they think the market is for that. This is often the case in my local charity shop.

I agree that many things are priced too highly. The charity shop should set the prices at the highest possible level where someone will come in before too long and snap the item up. If things are hanging on the racks for months on end then they've overestimated the price at which someone will think it's a bargain and pounce. If I donate something to Cancer Research, I expect them to use it to raise as much as they can for research into cancer, not price it low to make sure it's affordable to everybody.

There's a charity shop near my sister's house that just sells children's stuff. It's fab, she has had amazing bargains from there, for example a jumperoo for £10 which has been passed on countless times.

The charity shops near where I live are rubbish. Mostly cheap clothing selling at high prices, or terribly outdated items.

I find charity shops don't really have much in the way of clothes if you're larger like myself size 18 - 20 so bagging that rare designer find is nigh on impossible for me because the higher end shops only go up to size 16.

I'd rather get cheap items from the likes of F&F and Next clearance because even though i'm fat I still like clothes. Even if I could buy more quality clothing from the likes of Hobbs and Whistles, I don't want my wardrobe to comprise of just 6 or 7 classic items. I like a bit of variety in my life and buy cheaper supermarket clothes so I have more money for holidays

The charity shops round here only sell tiny amounts of kid's clothes or none at all.
They must get tons of kid's clothes donated. What do they do with them?
I donate my DC's stuff. I never throw anything away.
They must send it for rags or sell it overseas because you must surely be able to run an entire charity shop on donated kid's clothes.

Thats not a bad idea is it?

You are right but its really come to something when poor people are priced out of buying second hand

I agree many charity shops charge ridiculous prices. But being ethically responsible means shopping around. I buy lots of children's clothes online, mostly Oekotex certified Scandi brands. Sometimes individual items but mostly bundles to save on postage. They are always in good condition. When DD outgrows them I sell them on, so overall it costs very little. If you choose good quality natural fabrics like cotton, merino wool, alpaca knits etc they last years.

I get lots of my clothes from ebay, or swap things with friends. The shops seem full of nasty polyester/nylon blends these days. Some things are better secondhand. I love cashmere sweaters that have softened over time. I've only bought new cashmere once, it was stiff and prickly compared to secondhand!

Do you have any idea how little money the charity gets from everything you spend and everything that's donated?

That's the real scandal - at most 18 per cent of takings from a charity shop go to the... charity. Less, not more, than a standard shop that has to pay for stock, staff and rates - a lot less.

And it makes the overcharging more shameful, too.

Even if I could buy more quality clothing from the likes of Hobbs and Whistles, I don't want my wardrobe to comprise of just 6 or 7 classic items. I like a bit of variety in my life and buy cheaper supermarket clothes so I have more money for holidays

Does the sweatshop industry bother you? I didn't know much about it until I watched some documentaries. I was shocked by the working conditions. Children and pregnant women working dawn to dusk, denied toilet breaks, beaten for not working fast enough. Handling toxic chemicals and dyes. Being paid a pittance. Having no choice about the work because they need to survive.

Buying ethical clothing isn't a 'class statement'. It's about thinking beyond our desires for more holidays and more variety of things to wear. About educating ourselves instead of turning a blind eye to where our clothes come from.

In the west we're so far removed from the extreme poverty in other parts of the world, it's easy to overlook the impact of our choices. Our children may want the latest styles to match their friends, but other children are starving because their families aren't being paid a fair wage. We don't see the bigger picture because we're focused on the wrong things.

It's small changes that make a difference. That and educating the next generation.

Applauds MrsDV re signalling class and children's clothes charity shops!

My oldest DD(7), who has, to this point been wearing almost exclusively second hand (and third and fourth!) clothing, had a quiet word with me last night, asking to be taken to "...an actual, real clothes shop like ASDA or something" for her birthday (in 5 months - that's how much she wants it) , and money to spend.
I weep, as this child wears really nice items of clothing, which, even after being worn by two of my friend's daughters, or however many people on eBay, still look lovely and will last to clothe her sister in a few years time. But she wants the experience of off the peg fast fashion. Not sure how to handle this one, as I, like the OP, really do worry about the impact of clothing manufacture on the environment.

I love buying second hand, for the reasons mentioned in the op, so yanbu.

Though, I’ve recently got burned buying secondhand sofas, (they were beautiful and looked really clean, but had a strong whiff of cigarette smoke), and then I read a thread on here about bedbugs. Apparently one of the most common ways to get an infestation is through secondhand furniture. It’s made me really wary of secondhand furniture tbh! We’ve got rid of the smelly sofas just ordered some brand new sofas instead . We will use them for many, many years though, as we try to do with all our furniture.

But in order to have the option of buying from a charity shop, second-hand, etc. someone has bought it new!

We rarely buy second hand as we are in the fortunate position to not need to. Apart from knackered stuff which I will wash and give to charity as a bag of rags, everything is either handed on to people we know or given to a local charity shop. Old school uniform that is in decent condition is given to the school second hand shop.

Like most things in life, there is a middle ground...

Castleway My village has a Facebook recycling group too. It's great for passing on stuff that might otherwise end up in the tip and stuff that even the charity shop would struggle to sell. Old duvets (which people turn into dog beds), half-used tins of paint, sturdy cardboard boxes, packing beans, and a collection of children's clothes hangers have all been collected by grateful recipients recently.

Of course it involves class/income whatever you want to call it Ringfence

If your child needs trousers they need them now when you are poor. If almost your entire income is accounted for you don't have the luxury of shopping around or buying a bundle of clothing.
You may only be able to manage that one item.

I have been in that position.
Being poor is hard work. Frugality is a nice hobby if you are not doing it from necessity.

How can it not be a class issue when you get people waxing lyrical about how lovely second hand cashmere is compared to cheap (but essential) items made from nasty fabrics.

It all becomes pretty irrelevant once your child gets to a certain age, particularly if they are male. The clothes just aren't there.
I go to charity shops very regularly. Can't remember the last time I saw anything I could buy for my boys. Not since they turned about 3.

Like a pp mentioned those buying second hand are only one down on the fast fashion chain. If people didn't buy so many clothes in the first place where would you get your second hand stuff?

A pair of primark boots for under £10 are still doing me good 2 years later. They've only just started to wear (heel becoming loose), but for that price I'm not complaining!

Mm. Being male, my wardrobe differs greatly, but about 5 years ago I stopped buying £20 trousers, £10 shirts and socks off the market. Today's outerwear: £200 wool overcoat, £75 trousers, £65 Gant poplin shirt, £60 cashmere scarf, £120 DM shoes. Even DD thinks I no longer look like a pisshead on a war memorial. OK, I wear polo shirts, roofer's trousers and a filthy hiviz at work, but someone else pays for that.

You are right but its really come to something when poor people are priced out of buying second hand.

One of the reasons is because a lot of people swooped in and re-sold very cheap items online, Charity shops cottoned on and had to start marking them up as it was essentially lost income for the charity.

I've never purchased 2nd hand clothes, it's just not anything we ever did in our family (and we were not well off). I have no problem with anyone who does (and how would I know anyway).

I did however clothe DD in supermarket stuff 99% of the time, an outfit from NEXT or M and S was Granny's treat.

Frugality is a nice hobby if you are not doing it from necessity.

This is ridiculous, TheFirstMrsDV. I'm frugal because I've got no bloody money.

Many years ago my wardrobe was almost entirely from charity shops. I was a bit of a hippy and used to buy lots of beautiful 1930s and 40s things for buttons. I was, if I say so myself, pretty well dressed.

Fast forward 45 years and the kind of thing I used to buy is rarely available and, if it is, is vintage and costs £££££££s. Being older doesn't help as it's far too easy to look like a bag lady. Now I'm an avid sale shopper and buy basics from the bottom end of the high street. Occasionally I'll splash out on something stupidly expensive that will last me the rest of my life.

Accessories are another matter, charity shops often have wonderful scarves, bags and jewellery.

My one accessory indulgence is a leather manbag made from recycled bike jackets. Really heavy duty, so you can shove in a laptop, pad it with socks and underwear, and use it as a carry-on/weekender.

This is ridiculous

What is?