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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

'Clothes are cheap these days, no need for second hand'

254 replies

Upsidedownandinsideout · 25/02/2018 20:33

Just read this exact phrase on a current thread re FB selling groups but see it again and again on here.

Am no saint, I still buy things from Zara as well as preowned, and haven't darned a sock in my life. Still I worry that if even the members here, who generally work hard to do the best for our kids and worry about their futures, think nothing of buying new school trousers every growth spurt instead of taking up or down, or buy a new costume (flown from China) every year for World Book Day, or can't see the point in bothering to sell a second hand item - that's not a great sign for the future of our environment, especially when our fast fashion industry means that there increasingly isn't much value in donated clothes either.

Realistically though, AIBU to even spend time worrying about this? I feel like a (small, full-time-working and time- and money-poor) drop in a very large ocean every time I think about these things.

OP posts:
Flowersonthewall · 25/02/2018 21:20

Surely going shopping for clothes in primark or a charity shop takes the same amount of time? I've had some great bargains from charity shops ...Zara, timberland, phase eight, monsoon, oasis and all I good nick. Probably all around the four pound mark and taken as much time to find them as it would for me to trawl round the shops looking for something I like.

Domino20 · 25/02/2018 21:23

It takes 20,000 litres of water to produce 1 cotton t-shirt. It's a shocking waste of natural resources. About 300 million pairs of shoes go to landfill each year, we should all be thinking about these issues.

2boysnamedR · 25/02/2018 21:24

I buy what ever I can second hand. My sofas are second hand, my kids clothes are mostly second hand, prams are mostly second hand. I went to a NCT sale today and pass on and sell these things when they have served a purpose. I have four kids and never bought a new cot. Even one of the older kids beds was off eBay. My kids old stuff gets passed onto nursery for spares.
I think of all that plastic crap floating about in the sea and I feel sick. I could afford to get everything new - but no ones knows I’m a second hand junkie. We shouldn’t all be a society of throw aways. In a millennia from now, once the human race has died out this planet will still be choked by our shite

Doubletrouble99 · 25/02/2018 21:28

There is a truism about the well off and saving money. My children went to private school and there is usually a second hand shop at private schools. So you can get all the expensive uniform from there. No one cares a hoot. I have been given lots of hand me downs from friends and family and I have gratefully handed things on to others be they well off or not they are always grateful. I think it might be a country thing. Especially a farming thing.

Gwenhwyfar · 25/02/2018 21:28

" It drives me crazy that so many people make zero effort to reduce their impact on the planet."

Do you drive or fly? Because if you do, you do more harm than someone who buys new clothes.

mathanxiety · 25/02/2018 21:30

I am togged out head to toe in second hand finds today. Clarks boots, skinny jeans, t-shirt and voluminous cardigan. I only bought my undies and socks new. The coat I wore this morning was also second hand (Land's End, down-filled, full-length, and very cozy).

I only buy good brands second hand, and items that are in excellent condition or that I can rehab (like handbags). I have equipped myself and the DDs with several cashmere sweaters and cardigans, expensive brands of jeans, Frye ballet flats, two Coach bags, and a few more things that will last a long time.

I like the environmental friendliness of thrifting, and there is no arguing with the prices.

NameChanger22 · 25/02/2018 21:32

Most of my clothes come from Ebay and car boot sales. I've actually stopped buying clothes altogether now (apart from underwear, socks and night wear) because I have enough clothes to last a few years.

For DD I buy about 25% second hand. I don't often find nice clothes for her that she will wear anywhere other than the high street. School uniform I always have to buy new.

PeapodBurgundy · 25/02/2018 21:32

I commented on the same thread. I've not sold on that type of page yet, as we've kept all of our baby things in preparation for DC2 who is en route, but I buy from them.
I get a lot from charity shops (including DS's Baby Gap winter coat for £1.59), but once they get past the baby age, there's little in them, so the rest comes from sales. I've kept what's wearable, but DS is heavy on his clothes, so by the time they're outgrown (and often before), they're beyond use. I've always assumed this also accounts for the lack of clothes to fit him in the charity shop. A large amount of the appeal is the price. I've gone from being the high earner out of OH and I, to a SAHM. We manage with some luxuries, but if we don't spend carefully, we wouldn't manage anything above basic bills and groceries.

Secondly though, I also hate waste, we bin very little. I was genuinely shocked by the thread a few weeks ago where families the same size as mine were filling a large wheelie bin weekly. We bin very little, most things can be re used in some form or another. The lion share of our landfill waste is cat litter.
Each to their own, I don't like the tone of distain on some of the comments.

PopGoesTheWeaz · 25/02/2018 21:32

surely going shopping for clothes in primark or a charity shop

Well, no. Because Primark will have your size of what you want, probably a few options etc. When I go charity shop shopping I need to go to several before I find something suitable.

But they are really dire around me and tend to sell Primark and Tesco brand clothes, second hand, for more than the original price.

But that said, I still agreement with the sentiment of the thread!

DontMakeMeShushYou · 25/02/2018 21:32

Do you drive or fly? Because if you do, you do more harm than someone who buys new clothes.

Except that the sort of people who think about the environmental impact of the clothing industry are more likely to consider the environmental impact of other activities.

HairyToity · 25/02/2018 21:33

I love second hand, should really buy more. My husband likes his labels, but his Ted Baker shirts and levi jeans are ebay purchases. My son lives in his cousins hand me downs. My daughter is a mix of new and second hand. Depends how organised I am and she's an age that she likes to choose. I only have the odd second hand item. I'm the weak link.

We could afford to buy new, but don't always choose to as we have other priorities.

Petalflowers · 25/02/2018 21:33

I prefer to buy new stuff, and am pretty good at sale shopping. However, will always donate clothes to charity shops when I no longer want them.

roses2 · 25/02/2018 21:34

I buy most things from eBay including clothes, furniture etc. My sofa is from Harrods which I bought for £100. The quality vs price can't be beaten if you don't mind second hand. Most things are also in excellent condition.

My son is dressed in Ralph Lauren, timberland, Hackett, Clark's etc and I never pay more than £5 inc postage per item. His clothes then get passed down to his younger brother. When he grows out of them the clothes go to a charity shop.

Fintress · 25/02/2018 21:34

@Domino, you are a bit out with 20,000 litres, it's closer to 3,000 but I do see your point. I don't buy second hand but I buy quality clothing that lasts me a long time and is still good enough to be recycled to the clothing bins.

Sprinklesinmyelbow · 25/02/2018 21:37

“Today 21:20 Flowersonthewall

Surely going shopping for clothes in primark or a charity shop takes the same amount of time? I've had some great bargains from charity shops ...Zara, timberland, phase eight, monsoon, oasis and all I good nick. Probably all around the four pound mark and taken as much time to find them as it would for me to trawl round the shops looking for something I like.”

I don’t quite get this obsession with everyone who doesn’t use charity shops being primark shoppers? Why would they be?

And yes, charity shops are far more hassle. Namely:

I have to visit one, in person

I have to look through everything my size, not chose something I actually want then select my readily available size

The choice is extremely limited in any one charity shop, whichever way you look at it

I can’t return

I have to wash it before wearing because it stinks of charity shop.

And that’s before we get onto the nightmare that is buying second hand on FB or eBay Confused

I also don’t understand why people are talking about quality from places like white stuff or Zara- they’re just bog standard high street shops

mathanxiety · 25/02/2018 21:39

Doubletrouble99 - the private elementary school my DCs attended in the US always had a uniform swop at the end of the year. Anyone could pick up anything they needed by way of uniform there, regardless of whether they brought an item or not. I donated several times and picked up several times too.

When my DCs were all young, my friends and neighbours and I used to bring bags of clothing and footwear to each other's houses, pick what we wanted, maybe add a thing or two to the travelling bag, and send it on. We also picked up items from garage sales for ourselves and each other. It was always nice to get good quality winter jackets and snow bibs for pretty much nothing. Also nice to see a jacket or coat my DCs wore around town years later.

My sister in Dublin bemoaned the fact that nearly everyone she knew would have thrown up their hands in horror at the thought of their DCs wearing anything second (third, fourth?) hand. My niece's school frowned greatly at the idea of the girls wearing uniforms not bought brand new from the official supplier. A really unfortunate attitude imo...

YellowMakesMeSmile · 25/02/2018 21:40

Surely going shopping for clothes in primark or a charity shop takes the same amount of time

Not even remotely. We do two big shops a year for everything they need from underwear to pjs to uniform. I can log onto next and do it all in twenty minutes or less. To scour charity shops would mean a trip to town, several shops to try and get everything then only to end up in the retail shops anyway.

dementedma · 25/02/2018 21:43

love ebay. recently bought lovely red jacket for £4 which still had the original price tag of £50 on it and my best buy to date has been an Aquascutum blazer for £7.50.

Someone is about to get a bargain in our local charity shop. My mum's neighbour is a compulsive shopper of expensive stuff and is having a clear out. I got first rummage and reluctantly passed up a brand new, still boxed, pair of LK Bennet nude heels as they were too big. price tag on the bottom was £180.

megletthesecond · 25/02/2018 21:45

Second hand quality can be better than new. My dc's have had loads of decent second hand clothes over the years. I have a few second hand bits too.

Half my house is second hand furniture and I always buy second hand tv's.

CurlsandCurves · 25/02/2018 21:48

I don’t buy from charity shops for the simple reason that currently I can afford to buy new.

If I bought from a charity shop, I’d feel like i was taking good items away from people who genuinely need it.

ForalltheSaints · 25/02/2018 21:53

The OP missed out part of the title- it should start with 'clothes are so cheap and nasty...'. (though this really is a UK and US thing).

I have just come back from a week in Berlin and the contrast in the quality and style compared with the UK is noticeable. Even countries such as Belgium with plenty of people on low incomes can dress in a better way.

sallyandherarmy · 25/02/2018 21:54

Sprinklesinmyelbow

I don't know of any charity shop that you can't return items to. Even charity shops are governed by retail law.

I got a gorgeous Radley handbag, from my local charity shop, yesterday. £20.00 and looks almost new.

I was also surprised at the amount of brand new items were for sale, good brands as well. All with the brand new tags still attached.

Last week I got pair of Birkies for £3.49 ...still brand new in the box.

I check the charity shops first, always.

chickychickyparmparm · 25/02/2018 21:59

Secondhand for me, all the way. I find I have better quality stuff than if I buy cheaper new items - I buy at the "upper end" of charity shops, so I spend a bit more than the average but these clothes last for years and years.

Secondhand stuff is huge here in NZ though, you get enormous warehouse type places to rummage through. It's brilliant.

fantasmasgoria1 · 25/02/2018 22:00

I can afford to buy new and sometimes do but I love vintage clothing and I have had some amazing unique vintage stuff from charity shops.

Amummyatlast · 25/02/2018 22:02

I don't know of any charity shop that you can't return items to. Even charity shops are governed by retail law.

Which is much more limited than most retail shops' returns policies.

I buy games from charity shops, but I have no time or inclination to hunt through the rails of charity shops on the off chance something might both suit me and fit me.