To hate being alone

[Hueandcry]

Yet another weekend spent alone. I hate it. Aibu?

I understand. Sometimes Dh gets on my nerves, but I would be incredibly lonely without him.
Do you want to go on dates? Try and meet someone? Do you want to sign up to some dating apps?

I go to things during the week, Pilates & a club for an interest I have but there's nothing here at weekends. I live in a rural area. It's company I miss more than anything. I am on anti depressants actually but not finding they've made much difference

Hue. Doesn't help me that ex appears to have all the time in the world for socialising and relationships.

I get that Gerbil, one of mine is a pre-teen and no longer wants to spend time with me, preferring to be out with mates or holed up in his room gaming. I found Christmas horrific this year, valentine's not so bad compared to that.

What about joining a running club or something like that. I started running as a beginner on Saturday morning with a running club, and we run then have coffee afterwards. I don’t actually need more friends, but I now have them!

lovelurgan that made me laugh, thanks

Sounds like you're isolated if you're rural and there's nothing around and might need to travel to the nearest town/city to get your social fix instead/see people. Living rurally with little to do in the immediate vicinity doesn't suit everyone.

Also sorry if the use of the word wallowing was not liked, it's a term I use about myself openly too when I get stuck on focusing on how bad I think things are for myself rather than on possible solutions that are within my reach.

Not sure it was worth ignoring the rest of my post where I tried to help though.

Hueandcry my Post was intended to be motivating, not mean

Feeling alone is rubbish I feel for you honestly been there years ago when I was a single parent for 6 years.
Do you like reading a good book can pass hours there are readers groups on the internet to then discuss what you thought.
Treat yourself to a bath candles chocolates a good film. They wont be self obsessed teens forever bet they start wanting your company again soon.
Maybe facetime or text family sort out a visit once a month something to look forward too.

What sort of activities interest you?

Do you want to do something in the daytime or in the evenings?

Do you want to be active or passive?

Indoors or out?

I'd fancy specialist cookery days or an art gallery or stately home 'special interest' visit to see and discuss just a few exhibits in depth.

Keep narrowing it down until you find something that appeals.

Your depression sounds situational, so I'm not surprised medication isn't helping. Have you been over to ChuMs on Facebook? It's a mumsnet offshoot and you can meet other people in your area on there. Might be slightly less daunting than going to a meet up group or similar.

I get exactly how you feel OP. Im a single parent and my kids are 18 and 16. This weekend I've felt really lonely. I've got friends, yet they're not always free at weekends as they're busy with their families and other halves. It's difficult to know how to meet new people. I used to meet loads of people through the kids, obviously that doesn't happen anymore.

Thanks for all the suggestions. I do have Friends, it's not that I don't, it's just I'm the only single parent & i guess they don't think about me being on my own so much. Sadly I can't run as I have arthritis in my joints. Going to have a think about all the suggestions. Thanks

Just some ideas:

Pick a new recipe to make each weekend. Something that will take a bit of time. Stick some music or a movie on in the background while you cook and pour a glass of wine.

Stay active on sites like Mumsnet and also Reddit. There are so many people out there in similar situations and it's always better to talk and get ideas from others, laugh at funny threads and so on.

I'm chronically ill myself so understand you'll have some restrictions but perhaps pick a garden or house project. Doesn't need to be expensive, maybe things like painting a bookcase, planting some new flowers for spring etc.

Do hair masks, face masks, eyebrows, nails. Pamper yourself.

Lose yourself on YouTube.

Do you have a pet or could you maybe get one?

Volunteer work?

Op

Have a look at meetups as there are many things to do with others at the weekends if you choose

Walking, socialising, meals out all with people on the same level

Parkrun are always looking for volunteers to help if you want something you can do but not be committed every week

I made my peace with it early on.

I do lots of things just for me; get up when I want, watch what I want, read a lot, go for walks.

I try and think positively and use the time now to recharge.

I had a look at meetups, the last post for my area was in 2004!!! Guess there's not many mumsnetters near me

Not on mumsnet .....meetups google it

I found downloading the app Mush really good when I was feeling really lonely on maternity leave. I've met lots of lovely local mums and made some really good friends. Admittedly, the target audience is probably mum's with young children but I have seen plenty of mum's on there with older kids and teens.

YANBU I hate feeling lonely and really don't like my own company for too long.

Are you up for dating? Plenty of OLD opportunities out there. Not everyone's cup of tea but it could fill a gap maybe?

for you as I think loneliness is a horrible thing to experience.

Everyone always suggests Meetups, but when I look on the site there's hardly anything in my area. I live in a fairly big town. It sounds like a great idea, but I'd be interested to hear if anyone's actually gone to any of the events.

I spent last week one a single parent group holiday and hated every minute of it. It really helped me see that despite my believing I hated being alone, I now realise I like it so much more than I thought I did.

Have you been to the hardly there events?

I’ve been to meetups, a couple of groups and I’ve made girl friends- which is great as they also want to go for Sunday lunch or have a night out on a Friday after work.

One person started a group as there wasn’t what she was looking for

It’s great as you can dip in and out when you want

Lots of stuff you can do on a weekend
Courses
OU course
Anything that takes up your time
I’m in a similar boat. But I’m not lucky enough to have children.
But I would say, when your children reach teenagehood I can imagine it’s hard to adjust.

I have been on my own a while, to begin with I hated it, evenings and weekends were hard (dc’s spend Sundays with their dad), I used to dread weekends. Now I have hobbies which I can do by myself or with others, I also go to the gym and swim. If I have a Sunday on my own I do my hobbie for a few hours, go to the gym, do my food shop and before I know it the dc’s are back. I also do a bit of online dating so I go on dates some weekends, it’s nice just to get out for a coffee with a me,her of the opposite sex.

I’m now happier with my own company and I look forward to the weekends, of course there’s times where I still feel lonely but it’s not the end of the world.