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Original poster

How much do you change your MN identity?

55 replies

Movingon2018 · 16/02/2018 20:19

It was picked up on one of my posts that there were inconsistencies in facts in some of my posts. I value the advice I get on Aibu but I name change & vary the details of my life in my posts so as not to be outed as know friend come on here.
My general view is that I really value some of the advice on here but I do want to protect my identity a bit. It’s an Internet forum at the end of the day.
So Aibu to vary the details of my posts to protect my identity on here? How many on here name change/ vary their life information?

OP posts:
Abouttoblow · 17/02/2018 01:36

Unfortunately in some cases a poster changes a few details to, obviously, try and remain anonymous and the troll hunters are on it like a pack of rabid dogs.
It's a shame really.

BedtimeTea · 17/02/2018 02:32

I change ages & sex of my children. I have been a member about eleven years.

Natsku · 17/02/2018 02:52

I don't change anything, accidentally outed myself some time ago when I kept name change failing when writing about something very identifying so now I just can't be arsed. I'd get too confused trying to tweak details anyway!

echt · 17/02/2018 02:53

I'm mostly me, and don't change life info., but when posting about certain aspects work or Aussie schools in particular, I name change, as my school could conceivably be identified with what I say. And my tits could/would be in the mangle.

I've NCd for some sensitive personal subjects that could still get back to the pesky school link, also to protect DC.

I have list of NCs a mile long, all one-offs.

echt · 17/02/2018 02:54

I should also say I've never NCd to be the twat incognito.

FountainOfGerkins · 17/02/2018 03:03

Yep I NC and change details. For a few reasons really.

  1. I posted about something pretty personal a couple years back. People treated it like an episode of eastenders and everytime I declined to give further info (not stuff that was even close to relevant) troll hunters jumped on me. I felt awful; I was dealing with a very upsetting situation. I said I'd come back in 2-3 days to update but for now I was going offsite to deal with it and I did go back on a day later to find that people were "making up their own endings" and stuff to what happened, because they couldn't live not knowing what happened! I was Hmm FYI I didn't have a secret safe or anything, I suspected my Dh was having an affair and it was related to that... I did my first NC after because I didn't want it linked to me forever.

Reason 2 is the media being so obsessed with MN. If I end up in the papers I'd rather not be able to have 100 other posts brought up with details about my life that I could be identified from.

Reason 3; I did have a close call where I was identified but thankfully hadn't said anything I wouldn't want her to know anyway. I NC after that.

I NC every 6-8 weeks, more if I have a situation I need help with.

Perendinate · 17/02/2018 06:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EssentialHummus · 17/02/2018 06:54

I’m fairly open and have only NC’d once for something that would have been really difficult if it had come out in my friendship group. I’ve had posters contact me to say they live nearby etc, and I found it a positive thing rather than a hindrance. Likewise when someone months later asked after my house move / fussy husband / ttc on another thread, I felt a positive sense of community - the equivalent of passing someone I know on the street.

I do try to assess how much I need to say in a post so as not to share unnecessarily though, and will occasionally change details if I’m feeling cautious.

Pengggwn · 17/02/2018 07:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MaxWeber · 17/02/2018 07:18

I name change every couple of weeks, but avoid many of the dangers inherent in social media use by never saying anything interesting

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 17/02/2018 07:27

I’m the opposite of pretty much everyone on the thread, I think I have NC about once (to talk about mental health issues), I go to (used to go to) meet ups, I can never be bothered to change details.... I don’t know, I just don’t care if people know stuff about me I guess.

Roussette · 17/02/2018 07:30

I've been here since dinosaurs roamed the earth and have NCd just once (because of a security issue) because I like the consistency., is that odd? It's hard to get to know ppl if they're changing their name every two weeks.

However, I do tweak details about myself to make me non identifying, I would hate anyone to know Rou is me, if that makes sense. MN is the only forum I've ever known that allows NCs and personally I find it a bit strange. I know some people NC for very personal reasons (domestic abuse don't want to be identified etc) but it does make the whole forum a bit transient

NerrSnerr · 17/02/2018 07:38

I don't change details but I don't share anything that's worth outing (or that people in the real world don't know). I don't talk about work or anything that could get me into trouble.

polkadotpixie · 17/02/2018 07:51

I don't change anything at all. I'm a very open person and couldn't really care less what/how much people know about me.

I wouldn't post the name of my employer because it's against their social media policy and I don't want to get sacked but other than that I am totally open and truthful

I'm not famous or interesting enough to end up in the newspaper and I stand by everything I post, I would behave exactly the same if I was posting with my Facebook account

2018SoFarSoGreat · 17/02/2018 08:07

Fountain i did have a secret safe but that didn't make me name change. 😳

I rather stupidly posted links to my house when preparing it for sale, before figuring out how to link with a name like 'here' instead of the actual address. That was weird but no harm done.

I have name changed because my last name included the year. So does this. Next year I shall pick a whole new name.

I'm not too concerned about people figuring out who I am. At least I don't think so. Hmm. Now I'm rethinking that.

SofiaAmes · 17/02/2018 08:10

I am such a loser...I joined right in the beginning and didn't realize one was supposed to have a pseudonym....I have no secrets anyway.

GaraMedouar · 17/02/2018 08:13

I might change sex and age very slightly of kids. Or if I mention a hobby I won’t say I do swimming every morning I’d say doing my exercise every morning so it could be various things (ha, exercise every morning - chance would be a fine thing!)
I’ve name changed once after a few years in, I’ll change again in a year or so.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 17/02/2018 08:23

I had my first name for years and I've name changed twice since then. I don't change details of my life because I don't say anything that isn't widely known anyway.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 17/02/2018 08:24

Why can't people say they do swimming every morning? What's outing about that? Confused

Pengggwn · 17/02/2018 08:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AvocadosBeforeMortgages · 17/02/2018 08:31

I add in some inconsistencies (e.g. Changing nature of my relationship to a person) and change my username on a reasonably regular basis to make it harder to follow

GaraMedouar · 17/02/2018 08:39

Perfectlysymmetrucalbuttocks - the swimming thing was just an example - I just change things automatically - so if I did an evening class and the issue was something about the being able to get out to the evening class I might change the fact that it was line dancing to yoga or something. Just if people do search then they can’t easily tie up.
But I know that lots of people will have same details as me - I’m fairly normal and typical - I have read OPs in here thinking that sounds exactly like me, to a “t”.

JenniferYellowHat1980 · 17/02/2018 08:41

I'm going to soon. I've been using this one a while now - the number is random - and think if anyone cared to they could build up quite a clear picture. A poster used to actually offer to do that actually, just to illustrate how much we give away.

I've changed a few times since 2009. It's also crossed my mind that my DCs know I use this app and in future I'll want to be a bit more security conscious about my identity. I may have posted occasional things I wouldn't want them to know.

In general I don't post overly personal stuff but there are occasions I want advice on a horrible situation someone I love is in, but fear to ask as it's quite outing.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 17/02/2018 08:42

OK, Pengggwn, but she could name change for sensitive stuff. I mention on here that I'm a member of the Tolkien Society frequently. That's far more outing. If I shared stuff on here that I didn't want people to know, I'd name change.

PorklessPie · 17/02/2018 08:44

I've change accounts a few times, but I've had this one for a while and don't name change. I post nothing exciting anyway but people could easily guess who I am if they knew me in rl.