To report this major lack of judgment?

[FireUnderpants]

I had some work done on the front of my house. MIL asked the caretaker/oddjob person at her work and he said he could do it for a reasonable price. (He was meant to come earlier this week but was rained off, job involved cement, so came today even though I was out for a good few hours)

I went off this morning leaving him with a cup of tea, then arrived back to find the work almost done and my nephew sat outside with an unhappy builder.

SiL has told him Aunt Fire has got a builder round, so they turned up at my house to watch. Knowing I’m not there and the house is locked up. So it wasn’t even to visit. Sil sat in the car and then nephew refused to leave. So to stop the argument he said he would drop him home and sil wrote down her address and drove off.

Nephew is 8 and has learning difficulties. Builder is completely unknown to us. Mil is not really even on friendly chat level with him. I’ve paid and apologised to him and have told him I will drop nephew back myself after dinner.

Do I leash hell on sail as drop off or report this to ss?

I wouldn’t report it but I would have very very strong words. This is not okay at all but some people are naive

She left an 8 year old with learning difficulties with someone she didn't know? Bloody hell. I don't know if I'd report her but I'd definitely make sure she knew how wrong what she did was.

Did nephew have a good time? And did the work get done? What exactly would you expect SS to do?

Wow.

So your So I couldn't get her son back in the car so just drove off?

What is she like in General? Is it part if a bigger picture? In which case I think inwould report. Other wise id be having strong words with her

Nephew had a great time. He thinks he was a great help and wants to be a builder.

He rearranged the mans tool box several times, tried starting up his van and kept stepping in the cement. He has the ability of a 4 year old, but is the same height as my 10 year old.

Was the builder happy with this arrangement?

Reporting to SS is a bit OTT , I’d just make it clear that it is not to happen again and tell her that the builder was far from happy . At least nephew had a good time .

He seemed a bit bewildered and annoyed that all his stuff had been moved about despite him constantly telling nephew not to touch. He made a half joke I should pay more for the babysitting.

Wtf?

What if dn had been injured? Is your sil usually so odd?

I'm not sure you can report to anyone tbh, but your SIL needs a shake.

Good grief! The poor son... and builder. I would report to SS actually. This is just not normal behavour to drop your child witha complete stranger and the son is obviously vulnerable.

Perhaps if she is at the end of her tether and some hepl from SS is what she needs. (Crossing fingers that SS would actually offer some useful help)

Childcare at its most Cheeky Fuckery!

Unless this is just one in a long series of neglect and bad judgement then no to SS,mostly because there's not a lot they can do anyways.
But present her with a babysitting bill from the builder and have serious words with her. What she did is not ok.

I’m not clear on what has happened here.
Your sil took her 8 yr old son who has learning difficulties round to your house to watch a builder do a job for you, then buggered off and left him alone with the builder to interfere with his tools, van and get in the way?
Is that correct?

I think it is a huge ask to look after an unknown eight year old with learning difficulties, particularly if the builder had potentially dangerous tools and equipment around. I asked if he was happy with the arrangement because I wondered if he had offered - clearly not!

I think the builder deserves a good tip. Poor bloke was there to do a job, not - as he said - babysit. Suppose the child had managed to hurt himself on one of the tools or something - how awful for the builder.

Really really nelectful behaviour on SIL's part.

Did the builder at least manage to complete the day's work? If not, I'd ask SIL to pay for an additional day as her choice has cost you financially. And yes, point out tgat although her DS is fine, this man could be anyone & won't have appropriate insurance cover for a child with SEN to be playing on site. It's his workplace, not a childcare setting.

Yes Pictish. Exactly.

I was out most of the day, which sil knew, so there’s not even a reason for them to be at my house.

DH is as flabbergasted as me. He’s taking nephew home when he is home from work and is going to ask his sister wtf is wrong with her.

What if the builder was a twat and thought fuck this and left. Or lost him temper or hurt him.

Ds2 would be looking at her for neglect.

What if your dn had a melt down or decided to walk off and go home.. leaving him with some one who doesn't know the child or how to handle things if something did happen is not only unfair but dangourus.

Proper odd! Why would you leave your child with a random builder?!

Wow...that’s astonishing! I wonder what she was thinking?!

Report? To who?

@falsepriest SS , which the builder could've actually done. Just ting and say some woman abandoned her kid with me. And she would be in serious shit.

@FireUnderpants did the builder try and ring u to tell you he was there?

Obviously this is completely out of order. How do you and DH get on with SIL? Has she a partner? Any other DC? Sounds as if she is not coping. Luckily no harm done, could have been very different.