To report this major lack of judgment?

[FireUnderpants]

I had some work done on the front of my house. MIL asked the caretaker/oddjob person at her work and he said he could do it for a reasonable price. (He was meant to come earlier this week but was rained off, job involved cement, so came today even though I was out for a good few hours)

I went off this morning leaving him with a cup of tea, then arrived back to find the work almost done and my nephew sat outside with an unhappy builder.

SiL has told him Aunt Fire has got a builder round, so they turned up at my house to watch. Knowing I’m not there and the house is locked up. So it wasn’t even to visit. Sil sat in the car and then nephew refused to leave. So to stop the argument he said he would drop him home and sil wrote down her address and drove off.

Nephew is 8 and has learning difficulties. Builder is completely unknown to us. Mil is not really even on friendly chat level with him. I’ve paid and apologised to him and have told him I will drop nephew back myself after dinner.

Do I leash hell on sail as drop off or report this to ss?

Are your nephew's learning difficulties hereditary? I don't think it's hard to see where they came from, if so!
Your SIL is completely mad to leave him with a stranger, especially one that was armed with all sorts of tools that your DN could get into mischief with. Incredibly irresponsible and very unfair of her to burden that poor man with babysitting duties.

Have you told SIL that she's an absolute bell end and needs to stop being a half arsed shit parent?!

This is disgraceful.

I wonder if you DN had a bit of a meltdown at being told to leave and your SIL just had had enough overall. I mean, wrong on all levels, but I can understand how the mum of a SN 8 year old might just have Had. Enough.

Maybe some gentle enquiries into your SILs mental health, once she's been told what the repercussions of leaving her son could have been?

Did she text anyone to say she had left him at your house? I am finding it hard to make this ok in my head. What a weird woman.

A child, and also an even more vulnerable child, was left with an unknown adult. Your SIL left her child at potential risk. What if the adult could not be around children or vulnerable adults due to previous convictions?
The poor builder had a vulnerable child around his tools and his van - what if the child had been injured
You can report to SS, even if they don't do anything they will keep a record. If there have been other reports to them, they may then have cause for concern

Yes report to SS. If in doubt always report as they have the training to know what to do.

No, the builder didn’t attempt to phone me. Nor has sil!!! For all she knows I could still be out and she has no way to contact the man she left her son with.

You can speak to the NSPCC and they will give you advice as to what to do.

bloody hell. What a bizarre and dangerous thing to do. That builder could have been anyone

He made a half joke I should pay more for the babysitting.

I don't think he's joking.

oh my goodness - that is bat shit - she needs to give her head a serious wobble!! I hope your husband tells her what an irresponsible twit she is.

@FireUnderpants i find that odd ..if someone I didn't know left their equally unknown kid with me , I'd try to get in contact with you.
"Hey lady,there's a kid /nephew I don't know/your nephew at your house"

I wouldn't contact sil at all keep your dn untill she calls wondering where he is.

It Could give her the wake up call she needs

I apologised profusely and paid him more than we had agreed on.

Make sure you bill SIL for it.

I think I would report this to someone. It’s not normal or acceptable to drive off and leave a vulnerable child with a stranger. I can’t imagine any situation where I’d do this with my 7yo. It’s putting the builder in a very awkward position too- she’s lucky he didn’t call the police. If your SiL is at breaking point, for your DN sake, it is perhaps time the authorities were involved.

Outrageous behaviour from you SIL. Feel very sorry for your nephew if his mother thinks that it’s ok to leave an 8 year old child with a complete stranger. Feel sorry for the builder too. SIL needs a good talking to. I hope your DH enlightens her.

Builder deserves a tip. None of the rest would worry me in the slightest.

That is beyond bizarre. I can understand why you and the builder are peed off.

Did the builder actually offer tho? I would doubt it. Perhaps the SIL said she’d only be gone a few minutes on an errand, or lied and said that the OP was on her way home, and he reluctantly agreed?

Where did SIL have to be so urgently that she had to dump her child with a stranger?

If some stranger left their kid with me I would call the police.

whoops, just reread OP and saw that the builder offered to give him a lift home. Bizarre!

That poor builder, your SIL out him in a very difficult position. Sounds like your nephew had a great time though