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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To feel guilty that I'm not taking kids on holiday this year

162 replies

Peachsnowpop · 15/02/2018 07:46

We had a huge over the top holiday last year and we're still paying for that (£15k ish holiday). We go away every year abroad but this year we need to knuckle down and clear debt. We'll still have great days out but there's no 2 weeks away in an AI

OP posts:

BarbarianMum · 15/02/2018 14:01

The reality is that guests on an AI holiday do tend to stick around the hotel far more than those who are paying for bed and breakfast only. If you've already paid for drinks and meals and ice cream as part of the hotel price, you are not going to want to travel too far, try out local bars and restaurants etc

McDougalMcPhee · 15/02/2018 14:04

i have been to some AI hotels that open the gates to allow guests out of the complex daily - usually at set times, say between 2-5pm, so plenty time to visit the local area.

what??? you mean you are not able to get out at other times? bollocks to that - i go AI sometimes, but would NEVER go anywhere like that.

I have been on cruises, and obviously you have set times, but seriously!

FairiesVsPixies · 15/02/2018 14:10

I have been to some AI hotels that open the gates to allow guests out of the complex daily - usually at set times, say between 2-5pm

What kind of AI has gates?

Blackteadrinker77 · 15/02/2018 14:19

I think @speakout was not being serious

speakout · 15/02/2018 14:27

What kind of AI has gates?

I thought that was standard?
Even just for safety- eases crowd pressure when the chip queue gets rowdy.

BigFatGoalie · 15/02/2018 14:29

backin and the other poster who’s name I cannot remember, I do think it matters that some people cannot feed their children. Of course it’s not the OP’s fault (FFS you loon) but feeling guilty that you cannot take your children on a holiday just shows how out of touch she is with reality. I doubt her children will be scarred for life.
Sometimes when I peruse MN I feel I am one of the minority (along with dailymail) who’s lives don’t revolve around trying to be my DC’s best friend...
Or putting ammaaazzzing photos on Facebook hun! Lol!

🤮

Original poster

Peachsnowpop · 15/02/2018 18:22

Bigfatgoalie - I am certainly not out of touch with reality. You don't wanna be your DCs best friend ?? V odd.

OP posts:

Chienrouge · 15/02/2018 18:24

You don't wanna be your DCs best friend ?? V odd

Why is that odd? I don’t want to be my DC’s best friend. I want to be their parent.

Original poster

Peachsnowpop · 15/02/2018 18:30

So parent your child then chienrouge, personally I'm their parent and best friend.

OP posts:

BigFatGoalie · 15/02/2018 18:33

I don’t “wanna” be my DC’s best friend.
I have enough friends, thanks.
I want to parent them, lead them, guide them, advise them with maturity and my life experience and love them amongst other things.

Not write our initials in their diaries with a big BFF heart next to it.

BigFatGoalie · 15/02/2018 18:34

Or cater to their every whim and desire so that they grow up to believe that they’re the centre of the universe.
The world needs fewer people who believe they are owed everything on a platter.

Original poster

Peachsnowpop · 15/02/2018 18:37

So you're not friends with your child, ur only there to show them the way..

OP posts:

NaughtyNoraTheNamechanger · 15/02/2018 18:38

When I was little we used to do a lot of caravan holidays in the UK, didn't go abroad until I was 14. Literally, I did not set foot outside of the UK until I was 14. I'm still alive so YANBU. It's just sensible.

Chienrouge · 15/02/2018 18:38

I’d rather my 4 and 2 year olds had best friends their own age!

Gottagetmoving · 15/02/2018 18:38

Feeling guilty for not taking your kids on holiday one year?!
Seriously?
I think some people are so fucking fortunate that they have lost all sense of reality.
You must be aware that some people can't afford a holiday any year?... Do you reckon they should feel guilty?

crackerjacket · 15/02/2018 18:44

15 k on a holiday!!!!!!

WhooooAmI24601 · 15/02/2018 18:44

So parent your child then chienrouge, personally I'm their parent and best friend.

You're Regina George's Mother aren't you?

What if your DCs don't want you as their best friend? Are they allowed a say in it or does your need for popularity amongst children trump what they want?

I have two DCs and they are funny, kind and great company. I love spending time with them, we have adventures and travel and see the world with them. But my word I won't hesitate to pull rank on them when they need it because they're not my mates they're my children and it's my job to guide them through the tough times and correct them through the shit times.

formerbabe · 15/02/2018 18:50

Gosh, this thread has really tugged at my heart strings.

You poor poor thing.

It's just awful how some people are forced to live nowadays.

I just hope and pray that one day we'll live in a world where every child gets a holiday abroad every year.

imip · 15/02/2018 18:54

Never have been, or desire to, go on an AI holiday. However, we do go on £10-15k trips every couple of years recently because our families live abroad and we need to pay car hire, accomodation (can’t stay with families). We have to go again in a couple of months as my Mum is poorly with dementia and it may be the last time I see her (an expensive trip for something that will be traumatic). As a result, we have to spend summer in th UK (winter in my country) so we book a premier inn near the coast for a couple of days (4dc, dh and I). Honestly, dc are as happy as a long-haul trip! Rooms are generally £35 a night (we need two) and breakfast the next day. It compares favourable from our ‘cheapest place in Airbnb’! Just go on a short break, I’m sure they will appreciate the variety!

SaskaTchewan · 15/02/2018 18:55

I have been to some AI hotels that open the gates to allow guests out of the complex daily - usually at set times, say between 2-5pm

Classlesscucumber · 15/02/2018 18:56

I never set foot out of the UK until I was 25 and I'm a second generation immigrant.

Didn't do me any harm either (I think)

BigFatGoalie · 15/02/2018 19:18

whoooo thank you for being far more eloquent than me. Well put.

And former I completely agree, I too pray that soon the world will be a place as you described. #soblessed

Tinkerbec · 15/02/2018 19:36

I absolutely detest camping. Just awful.

Dd on the other hand loves it.

Don’t feel bad op you don’t need to go away every year. So you got into debt and are paying it off and have released you will have to go without this year. Nothing wrong with that.

Holidays are important to me, the outside, the experiences not the 4 by 4 walls I snore in every night. Well as long as it’s warm. :-))

Different people have different priorities nothing wrong in that. Others would go into debt for a car, kitchen, a house.

Kids would probably not bother about any of these.

L3moncak3 · 15/02/2018 19:52

My grandparents and parents never went abroad on holiday. One set of grand parents never had a holiday for 35 years because they were self employed. I have fond memories of building sand castles on the beach, rock pools, rivers, museums, swimming. There are plenty of cheaper holiday options. A holiday is a luxury, not a necessity.

theSnuffster · 15/02/2018 19:59

It's not essential to go on holiday every year- AI or otherwise.

I cannot get my head around why anyone would get in to debt for a holiday.

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