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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What age do you think your looks started to fade ?

472 replies

LardLizard · 14/02/2018 23:30

I think I still look pretty great at forty, don’t think my skin looks forty at all
So I’m wondering when will I really notice it ? Know it’s different for everyone
I’m think maybe after 50 now ?

OP posts:
creaturefeatures · 15/02/2018 08:29

Oh...and I don't have children yet. I fully expect that after my first DC I will age 10 years Sad

JanetStWalker · 15/02/2018 08:30

Whether we care to admit it or not, there is a certain beauty in youth. Not saying that all young people are beautiful but even the plain looking ones have that shiny veneer of youth and vitality that is so bloody lovely to look at.

Of course older women can be gorgeous but that extra special, lovely looking newness has long gone.

This also applies to boys/men so enough with the 'internalised misogyny' argument. Not everything needs to be reduced to a battle of the sexes.

BillywigSting · 15/02/2018 08:32

When I had ds, so 23 for me (though I'm still reasonably good looking, I'm not as fresh faced as I was at 21)

Mupflup · 15/02/2018 08:33

Early 40s for me..I'm 45 and until a few years ago I used to regularly get told I looked 10 years younger than I was. The last few years that has stopped and I have noticed a difference in myself in that my face has 'dropped' and I'm starting to look more like my mother Confused

fluffyrobin · 15/02/2018 08:34

Haven't got there yet and am in my 50s! Grin

I could be delusional of course Grin

But I have finally got the balance I wanted in my life 'nearly' right with regard to health, fitness, work, home, dh, dc, good friends, hobbies: by concentrating on getting the basics right.

As a result I feel happier, at peace and the confidence in looks and everything else for that matter, stems from that I think!

londonrach · 15/02/2018 08:35

Seriously i think people look more beautiful as they age as they stop using make up and life shows in the eyes and become alive. I work with the eldery

Sierra259 · 15/02/2018 08:37

Same as a previous poster. My face probably looks 5-10 years younger than I am, however if I didn't dye my hair, it would be pretty much completely grey. I'll be 40 soon.

Thebluedog · 15/02/2018 08:37

My looks started to fade due to lack of sleep with my first dc, I looked haggard and old, way beyond my years.

Now my youngest is 6, and I’m starting to get regular sleep and can spend time on my appearance my looks are coming back. With the exception of a few extra lbs I think I’m looking better than I ever have. V few wrinkles and I can now get to the hairdresser on a regular basis for cuts and colours. Im more confident in my skin and with the exception of jeans I’ve got my own style now. I’m 45.

spankhurst · 15/02/2018 08:37

Agree that youth has a special patina of beauty, and that 35 onwards (ish) is where good bone structure becomes the crucial factor.

CollyWombles · 15/02/2018 08:40

I'm 33 and in comparison to three years ago, I look like a totally different person. The last five years have been pretty rough so I'm putting it down to that (family issues, kids father issues, two severe depressive episodes, lost grandparents)

I think my personality is different now too 😳

weedoogie · 15/02/2018 08:40

My partner is 58 and I think she looks as good as she ever has; different from when she was younger, but still gorgeous. I love her face and her body; fancy her to bits....

I think staying slim is a big deal in battling aging - wish I had managed to stay slim. For me (and maybe its different for a bloke) I reckon that early 50s was when I started to go downhill - but that was also when I started to put on weight

LucilleBluth · 15/02/2018 08:42

Utterly depressing thread. No one looks ten years younger, people may look good for their age but almost never ten years younger. I'm 37 and feel about 25....until I meet an actual 25 year old. We can only try to eat well and exercise imo.

And what about the knowledge and wisdom gained from being an older woman, do we just dismiss it because we don't look 20. Anyway according to people on this thread I'm fucked because I have blonde hair, blue eyes and dimples.

grasspigeons · 15/02/2018 08:44

I never had any looks to lose
But at 40 the bits that look older are my body shape - middle age spread I guess, a few wrinkles around the eyes and slightly drier skin, eye colour has faded, got hairs on my chin to pluck, and a bit droopier in general.

n0ne · 15/02/2018 08:44

Surely it's genetic? My mum still looks fantastic (minimal lines or sagging) at 73 and I don't think I look much different now at 40 than I did 10+ years ago. I see some very fine lines but that's all. I really hope I have my mum's genes and not my dad's (he looked 80 at 60!)

MiaowTheCat · 15/02/2018 08:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ShatnersWig · 15/02/2018 08:47

Lucille Yes, some people do. I know a woman in her 30s who has been asked for ID for buying alcohol in Sainsbury's - I was there when it happened once. I've had a lot of people assume I am mid-30s when I am, in fact, 44. Most people think my dad, who is 65, is my elder brother as he looks mid-50s. Good genes, one assumes.

thegreatbeyond · 15/02/2018 08:47

Gruach, what a fabulous post. I love it.

cece · 15/02/2018 08:47

I'm 51 next week. I've noticed quite a difference in the past year.

MincemeatTart · 15/02/2018 08:49

I was t ever beautiful in my youth but age has improved me. It might be money rather than age but in 50s and very comfortable in my skin.
Most of my friends are good looking middle aged women. I don’t think one loses ones looks but one matured into a new look. Often more confident, more accepting of flaws and more classically styled.
Beauty is wasted on youth with all,their insecurities and hang ups.

alotalotalot · 15/02/2018 08:50

I wish I'd appreciated what I had when I had it, instead of angsting over a body/face I'd kill for now.

ImAPeppermintNightmare · 15/02/2018 08:50

There's something about the wording of this title that feels really uncomfortable and misogynistic to me. Like a woman only has a finite length of time when she has that magical appeal (ie of appearing desirable to men), and after a certain age it is all downhill. Would you ask the same question of a man?

MamaLupine · 15/02/2018 08:51

I always looked young for my age as do most of my family. I then had DD2 at 35. She was such a difficult, whingy baby and it went on until she was 3.5yrs. I completely blame her for aging me around 15 years in that period. I still look haggard and she's 8 now.

lubeybooby · 15/02/2018 08:52

At around 33 I started to notice I couldn't do my make up the same way anymore and that powder was ageing me. Over the last 5 years, I've overhauled my entire routine and all my products finding what works for me and I'm much happier with it all now.

sluj · 15/02/2018 08:53

Fortunately your looks go just after your near vision goes so you might be able to kid yourself you still look good for a bit longer. Most people struggle on without reading glasses for a year or two so thats an added illusory bonus in thinking you still look good. Unfortunately everyone else around you can see the reality......Grin

YTho · 15/02/2018 08:54

I don't think our looks start to fade, they just change over time.