Hi all, this is quite personal (and it's gonna be really long as ive got a lot to get off my chest so Sorry in advance), but I really need some impartial advice. I'm really confused and I genuinely don't know where to go from here or even if i should try to fix this. I am posting this in AIBU instead of relationships because people tend to give blunter answers - and that is what I need!
Been with BF for a while, we don't live together, but I stay at his every other night (he lives on his own, I am with parents saving for the seemingly impossible to obtain mortgage - this is relevant).
I have to commute for about 45 mins each way to work, whereas he works locally to where we both live, practically in the town centre and 5 mins walk from the pub. He goes to the pub every afternoon after he finishes work at 4. I work weird shift patterns so some weeks I finish at 5 and others I could finish as late as 8pm if we are running to time, sometimes we can still be there at gone 9 if something takes longer than expected or if we have a walk in emergency that can't wait.
On my early days when I get to our hometown at around 6 he is fine, and he genuinely is the loveliest most caring partner that I've ever had and I just want to be around him all the time because he makes me genuinely happy and I am in love with him, and I feel his love back.
He cooks for me, gets me tea/hot water bottles without me asking for them (just because I look like I need one), runs me baths, doesn't pester me for sex if he can see I've had a bad/stressful day or if I'm just exhausted. But our sex life is great, he has really embraced some of my more wacky desires and does it really well!
He texts me throughout the day taking a genuine interest in how its going, tells me several times a day that he loves/misses me. He is so attentive and makes me feel really special and loved throughout my work day - all great.
The problem is on my late weeks where he could end up being in the pub from 4pm - 9pm, and when I meet up with him he is obviously pretty drunk but still ok to be around, if a little belligerent and opinionated.
It's when I'm not going home with him on those occasions he goes really paranoid and starts a row over nothing. He will accuse me of getting up to no good and says he 'knows what I'm up to' but will not elaborate any further.
The other day i text him to ask if he was still in the pub so I could see him briefly and get a cuddle and a kiss on the way home, and he accused me of checking up on him to find out his wherabouts so I could meet someone else without worrying about bumping into him 
. I have never done this so I don't know where he got that idea from.
He gets quite hurtful and once he has this idea in his head, nothing will change his mind, not even if i take a picture of me sat in the living room or on my bed.
This happens on a fairly regular basis (3 times this week, latest one being tonight) literally over an non issue!
Tonight's was he was out with the boys, it got to midnight, I asked if he was coming over and he went all funny and passive aggressive saying that I had said I would stay at his tonight and calling me a liar etc.
When I relayed the conversation that we had had yesterday about where I was staying tonight and that he was welcome to stay over, and in the morning I'd make him a hangover breakfast feed the cats and then we would go to his for a 'fun' day (parents are away this weekend so have to be here to feed the cats -which he knows!!!!).
He started again accusing me of lying to him, and insisting that I had said nothing of the sort yesterday. He blew his top and went super cold on me when I screen shot and sent him the conversation where it showed i had said that i was home tonight and him saying that he remembered and that he might come over if he wasnt too drunk.
It sent him into a spin of him then asking me questions about my evening , what did i do? (ate fajhitas, had a bath and some wine and was chilling in bed watching the hobbit when this all kicked off) which pub did i go to? (Didn't go to any pub) who did I meet up with? (The freaking tooth fairy came round and we did a ouija board obviously) which are his way of trying to trip me up and catch me in a lie, so he can feel vindicated that he was justified in starting this whole pointless argument when he sobers up tomorrow.
It's really draining, and I am not happy for this behaviour to continue. The next day he is full of apologies etc, but I am now quite frankly fed up of this.
He is lovely in so many ways, but I can't help feeling that this is just something he does, and won't change or even try to change, and I don't want to deal with that any more.
What should I do?
Thanks for reading, it felt good just writing it all down.