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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

TO TAKE DS TO MCDONALDS OFTEN?

125 replies

BLUESEAPARADISE · 10/02/2018 10:44

AIBU to take my son to McDonalds often?

DS is 9 and has a wide range of health issues and also autism ( he is developmentally 9-18 months) and only eats a handful of things ( Custard, Chicken fillets from the butchers, chicken nuggets ( not from McDonald's) , Completely plain burger buns from McDonald's and walkers salt and vinegar crisps) That is his full diet... we have a dietitian.
( before has gone for days without eating because his " safe" food wasn't available as we were trying to encourage him to try new things )

For a while he has been refusing food and as a result we are all extremely worried as he has lost a lot of weight and we are at the point may have to take him into hospital and there is talk of a possibly feeding tube ( which he won't keep in / cope with well at all)

However today He has shown some interest in eating some burger buns .. AIBU to take him to McDonald's and just buy him a few burger buns to simply try and get him to put weight on and eat something?Sad I feel awful as I know he doesn't have the best diet and burger buns are far from the best but I really don't want him to loose any more weight( he hasn't had anything to eat since Thursday morning) and end up in hospital but I feel bad giving him just a plate of buns!

Please help .. I want to do what's best for him but feel absolutely awful which ever way I do it SadSad

OP posts:
OutwiththeOutCrowd · 10/02/2018 11:06

Oh Blue, it must be very difficult for you.

Please do take him and try to get a little pleasure out of seeing him eat a burger bun. I know what it's like to have a DC with eating issues. My DS had a feeding tube as a baby. Getting him to take a bottle was a struggle. Getting him to eat solid food was a struggle.

But eventually we got there. And one of my fondest memories is of watching him nibble a little bit of a chocolate doughnut in McDonalds in those early difficult days!

So no judgment from me - just sending love and support. Flowers

InsomniacAnonymous · 10/02/2018 11:07

Buy them in the supermarket.

timeisnotaline · 10/02/2018 11:07

I’d take him but if it works I’d be buying better burgers and contents and seeing if I could pass them off as the ‘real deal’ Grin

timeisnotaline · 10/02/2018 11:08

Oh it’s just the buns is it? I take my comment back, but yes I’d take him.

Scoose · 10/02/2018 11:11

Do you know anything about asd time? It's not as easy as just buying them in a supermarket I'm sure the op would do this if she could Hmm. Definitely take him and get him the buns op. My dd has asd and a very limited diet too and I know how hard and worrying it is I have to give her what she will eat which isn't the best but otherwise she would starve.

Lovemusic33 · 10/02/2018 11:11

My dd (now 14) also has ASD and a very poor diet, she would only eat fish fingers from McDonald’s, at home her diet is very limited. I take her to McDonald’s and her dad takes her quite often. This year she became brave enough to exchange her fish fingers for a filet o fish, she rarely tries anything different now she will eat this so I don’t mind taking her (instead of cooking her pizza every day at home).

Scoose · 10/02/2018 11:12

Sorry I didn't mean time I meant insomniac

Glumglowworm · 10/02/2018 11:13

Do whatever you have to do to get calories into him Flowers

Ignore anyone who judges you. Any food is better than no food at all. You’re under the care of a dietician. It very clearly isn’t a case of him being deliberately naughty or fussy for the sake of it.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 10/02/2018 11:13

I don't know why posters are suggesting burger buns from the supermarkets, etc. when OP has specified McDonald burger buns. I'm sure she's considered sesame seed topped buns from other places and has tried them.

========

BLUESEAPARADISE I remember your previous post, about your son being non-verbal and talking for the first time - every poster was so very pleased for you. How's he doing?

I think, if you're going to just one McDonalds, it might be beneficial for you to pop in there and have a chat with the manager. I very much doubt you'd be charged full whack and it would save having to explain yourself every time. From my experience, when staff know, they take care and they make an effort. That is what I would do anyway. Best wishes :)

LittleSwede · 10/02/2018 11:15

Agree with others, YANBU.

DD is autistic and food has always been an issue. She does love McDonalds though and I do take her quite frequently, partly for a proper feed (in terms of quantity - she always seems to eat more there than at home) and partly as I see it as a bit if a social outing to a familiar place. We always go at a quiet time and sit in the same corner.

Surely getting hi to eat is priority right now and I can't see that the burger buns would be any words than a slice of sliced bread in terms of nutrition. No one would judge you for giving a child a slice of toast.

Hope things improve and he manages to put on some weight.

WellTidy · 10/02/2018 11:16

My 6yo DS has ASD and severe developmental delays and has been diagnosed with Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder, which it sounds to me that your DS has too. I absolutely get it. The very restrictive list of foods that DS will eat does not include anything from McDonald's, but if it did, I would absolutely take him as often as I needed to. The rules that apply to other children don't apply here and dontlet anyone tell you that they do. Do whatever you have to do and let him enjoy the experience. You will both feel better.

floriad · 10/02/2018 11:17

I don't have any experience with this.

But it seems obvious to me that plain burger buns are better than nothing at all.

So yes, it seem perfectly fine to me personally. Flowers

Does he eat enriched burger buns?

Wellfuckmeinbothears · 10/02/2018 11:17

Definitely do whatever you need to do to get some food into him and avoid the distress of a hospital visit and feeding tube x

Only1scoop · 10/02/2018 11:18

Maybe buy some buns/rolls from supermarket

Can he choose his own that he wants to try

floriad · 10/02/2018 11:20

Ah, just realised that it's McDonalds burger buns or no buns at all.

Yes, taking him seems like the best solution to me and not unreasonable at all.

PurpleDaisies · 10/02/2018 11:21

Sorry, I should have added to my post that there are some specific buns in Tesco that are practically identical to the McDonald’s ones and if it’s not the fact that he eats them in McDonald’s and sees them coming from there that makes them obviously safe to him, it could be worth trying as a cheaper option.

But obviously, feed him whatever he’ll eat.

italiancortado · 10/02/2018 11:23

Yes take him. And don't think about it for another second. You don't need your choices to be justified. You should never feel like that.

There are far too many people out there making judgements about things they know jack shit about.

My DS eats very few foods, he is a teen now but still has very specific rules about his food, not just the type but also the amount (he eats his biscuits in multiples of 3) when we go on holiday we eat McDonald's every day! If I had to do that at home as well I absolutely would. DS used to get a plain cheeseburger with no burger. Yep, a cheese roll!

You do what you have to do, please don't ever think it's not the right thing to do, it absolutely is

spanieleyes · 10/02/2018 11:25

Practically identical is, unfortunately, usually no use!
My son will only eat french sticks from Morrison's, his cousin will only have ones from Tesco's ( both have Aspergers with food issues). They both KNOW if you try to give them an alternative!

delilahbucket · 10/02/2018 11:25

Do what you need to do and don't beat yourself up about it.

LittleMyLikesSnuffkin · 10/02/2018 11:28

Go for it. You do what you have to do for your child whatever it is to make them ok. I feel your pain in a way. My son is nearly 7 and has ASD. He has a dummy and a sippy bottle at bedtime and needs to be cuddled to sleep. He won’t break the routine he’s had since he was a baby. It’s not what I thought things would be like when I held my newborn son in my arms but whatever, it’s the way things are.

I hope your son starts eating soon best wishes to you both Flowers

InspMorse · 10/02/2018 11:29

Do they charge? Funnily enough, DD had a friend who only ate the bun. When herMum asked for a burger with nothing on it (no burger, nothing) they wrapped The bun up like a normal burger and didn't charge her.

AnnieAnoniMouse · 10/02/2018 11:36

I’d let him eat anything he showed an interest in.

However, I’d only buy 1-2 because once he’s eaten something, he might be happy to have some of the other things he’d normally eat, so I’d make sure I had some of each of those things in as the other options are a bit better for him. But if later he refused those and wanted more then, I’d go back & get more. Burger buns aren’t nutritionally fabulous, but I’d let him eat anything he would if it kept him out of hospital.

windchimesabotage · 10/02/2018 11:36

Yes just do what you have to do! Any food is better than none! Flowers

Floralnomad · 10/02/2018 11:38

If I were you I’d be at McDonald’s every day for at least one meal YANBU .

windchimesabotage · 10/02/2018 11:38

also you might try asking for a load of the burger buns to take home. I love their gerkins and asked for a load once and they did give me a box full! Depends on how nice the staff on that day are.

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