Wtf has happened to my brain

[sillyoldowl]

I used to be smart... I think. Two kids later and my brain is a marshmallow. I lose stuff all the time and can't remember what I'm talking about mid sentence. I am very sleep deprived.
Recently I really noticed it when I was throwing one of the kids up in the air and catching them... I did it maybe three times and realised... it. Was. The. Dog! He looked incredibly puzzled. I popped him back down and he just trotted off happily... but wtf happened there?!?
Anyone done anything equally stupid due to no sleep and to much on their mind!

Mine are older now and it’s not come back. Have a couple of incidents a day (but can’t remember today’s )

Driving with boot open, turning up for things on the wing day. Worst was arriving at work with toddler in the back, and having to get back in car to take him to nursery

I went to the fridge to get a satsuma. One fell out as I opened the door, so I peeled it and ate the first segment. Only at that moment did I realise it was in fact a lemon 🍋. Which was a completely different shape and much harder to peel.

Years ago when DS1 was about 3 moths old. Breastfeeding all the time and knackered.
Fed him to sleep and laid him down in cot. Went to check on him 5 min later and he wasn't in the cot. Didn't panic just thought "I'm sure I put him in there." Had a little look round the flat and then realised he'd managed to scoot up to the top of the cot from the bottom where I'd laid him down.

Regularly look for lost things that I'm holding. Boys are older now so can't blame sleep deprivation.

My latest one:

I’ve lost something. The only problem is I can’t remember what it is but I do know I very much want to use it.

I spent several minutes talking to dh today about Rake Wickman. He worked out i meant Rick Wakeman faster than me.

Did anyone watch Green Wing? DH and i watched it first time round before having kids and laughed a lot at the mum who works in the office and forgets to drop the kids off before work etc. We rewatched some of it at Christmas and I cried because I have turned into her!!
At work I have, on several occasions, had to mime the action of the surgical instrument I need passing because I can’t remember it’s name (eg snipping fingers for scissors).

I lost my book, couldn't find it anywhere and guess where I found it after turning the house upside down...? In the bloody OVEN I kid you now!! How the #&_? did it end up there?

I forgot to pick dd up from after school club.

I've walked out of the house without my hand bag.

I've walked to bus stop in my slippers & then had to turn back home.

I've gone on the school run with two different boots on but on the right feet iyswim so I didn't realise until I got there.

The list is endless, these are just some of the more recent ones.

I suffer with marshmallow brain too.
I've found milk in the cupboard and coffee in the fridge with absolutely no memory of me doing it.

Left for work without my skirt on, just tights and top with shoes. Good job I realised as I was locking the door.

Often ask DP if he's seen my glasses when they're on my fecking head.
One day I was on the phone to DP as I was leaving the house, I locked the door, put the keys in my pocket and off I went down the street. Had a quick feel in my pockets..keys? check! Cigs and lighter? check! and I actually said 'oh shit I've left my phone in the house' :)

My job is quite skilled, as in you need to know what your talking about all day. How I still have said job I do not know as I constantly zone out and can't remember my arse from my elbow. I'm being trusted to train some poor soul at the moment too :)

Regularly forget the name for things. Things I use and see every day for god's sake. It was the diffuser the other day. I called it - 'that hairdryer curly thing'

I'd love to tell you all it gets better over time but I'd be lying. My youngest is 18 so it's probably safe to say I'm never getting my brain back.

I took DD to the gp just before she was 2 and I was v v pregnant with DS. Saw gp, sent off stool speci which I had taken with me. Yay- did well!
Got back to car and was about to cross road but couldn’t find car keys. Crossed road, checked EVERYWHERE for keys and returned to surgery as I must have left them there. Checked waiting room- couldn’t find. Then queues to see receptionist. Explained problem 😳. She rang gp and asked him to look around his room when his patient had gone 😳. He rang her back 5 minutes later and they weren’t there. 😱.
I then decided that I must have dropped them by the car and hot footed it back to the car as I had been WAAAAAY over the hour allowed. When I got back to the car, the keys were still hanging in the drivers side door where I left them 😱😳😂. Oh the stress!
I wish I could say it got better but DCs are 16 & 14 now and I think I’m still insane 😳

My kids are in their 30s and don't think my brain ever came back, was at the job centre the other week and trying to say I had applied online and told my job coach I applied on err the thing on the table, when he looked at me strangely I said you know with the mouse and keyboard ooooo I mean I did it online. He smiled and told me come back in 2 weeks......i have the feeling he cried afterwards, I must be pushing his stats down 😂

ex was visiting and wondered whether there was something in the oven...

yep the croissants I put in to warm an hour ago. oops.

thankfully, they were still ok, though a little crispier than normal.

My best ones

• leaving the car keys on the car roof and going shopping
• put ice cube tray back in to the fridge
• taking hand bag off shoulder and putting it on desk - except there was no handbag there, I had left it in the tea room. I did almost the whole action (reach up to shoulder, bend down a little) before realising it wasn't there. Colleague saw the whole thing.

What's worse is these were pre dc.

I recently tried to set my phones alarm on the calculator

I was tired and stressed out and in my own small world. Went to the garage to put some diesel into my car, thinking I have to hurry. Went to pay and only when the shop ass looked at me disapprovingly I realised there was an ordinary queue on the side.
I profusely apologised, fortunately they were all very understanding- I must have looked the state, honestly.

The other day I went to the supermarket and after I'd finished shopping took the trolley back to the trolley park. When I got back to the car it felt like something wasn't right but couldn't work out what. It took me a full minute to realise I'd left 6mo DS in there. I rushed back in a blind panic, but luckily he was happily sat it there smiling away bashing the teething ring against the trolley bars.

Oh op I hear you! It was my birthday a few weeks ago and I got money from my dad which I planned to spend on a certain thing so hid it away.

18 days later I'm still looking for it

Dp calls me " scatty head "

My eldest is almost 12 and my youngest is two so this has been going in for a long time. Spent ages searching for the green apples I had just bought from the supermarket. Only clicked when I found a bag of defrosted frozen chips in the salad drawer. I even left the apples to defrost thinking they would be ok. They weren't. They went brown!
I reversed off our driveway straight into my across-the-road-neighbours car and then drove off. I quickly went back and snotty sobbed and apology and offer of fixing in. After working till midnight and then being up all night with the baby I rang work and told them I couldn't come in because I was tired. I genuinely don't think I was safe to drive for a long time when ds was small.
Trying to put my dd jeans on was a highlight. It took far too long to realised that they weren't mine!

I tried to check a pan of bubbling water was boiling by putting my hand in it- fortunately dh caught it and asked what the fuck I was doing!
I also left a shop thinking "I'm sure I'm missing something, ds1&2? Check, shopping? Check"
They called me back asking if the pram with dd in was mine.

I think there's a thread in Classics About this where a mum describes spending half an hour in the middle of the night standing upstairs holding and bouncing her newborn trying to get it off to sleep. Only it turned out the baby was actually a bag of potatoes and her actual baby was still in the cot! She had no recollection of fetching the bag of potatoes from downstairs.

Two kids, no brain here also. I used to be clever. Now I have to think really hard and double check everything at work. I sometimes think 'is this what it's like to be thick?'

That cracked me up

Just thought of some more. Ds is two and a half and only just sleeping through. I work until 12am so it's been awful.
I got a phone call from school asking if my pram was green? 'Erm, yes?'firstly I wasn't sure and secondly why did she want to know?
Because it had been handed into school by another mum who had said 'I think this is dd2's mums pram' I hadn't even noticed and wouldn't have until the following morning!
I once left the front door wide open. I shut the car keys in the boot and had to walk Home to get the spare house key off the neighbour to get into the house for my spare car key!
Spent ten minutes walking around the supermarket car park pressing the car key fob because dh had just got a new car and I couldn't remember what it looked like.
When dd1 was tiny I would wake in a panic that I was feeding her and she wasn't there. I'd put her back in her Moses basket without realising. It worked the other way too when I would wake with her latched on and no memory of picking her up. With ds I fed him lying down so I could go back to sleep!
Sending the other two to school with the wrong lunches. Not a big deal but when one will only eat jam sandwiches and the other had eaten them it's the end of the world!
I cried a lot. If someone asked how I was I would just start to leak from my eyes and then apologise as I couldn't stop it!

I just went about making lunch and had to stop for ten minutes to find my phone with the recipe which I had just been looking at! I used the house phone to call it eight times before realising I'd left it in the fridge. It took me so long because it sounded like it was in another room no matter where I was in the house!

I've also let DH, dog and DS in the house of an evening with DH's keys. It wasn't until the next morning when DH couldn't find said keys that we realised I'd left them in the front door. We live on the high street. DH was not too happy about that one!

Some of these are scary...

I know...!

I had a mental breakdown two years ago after a head injury. The sleep deprivation of nearly 10 days with no sleep whatsoever quite literally drove me insane and made sleep deprivation with a baby seem an absolute doddle.

I still get very odd 'mind blank' episodes as a result of my head injury and post concussion syndrome, and find my thoughts slowing down so much that it is like they are wading through treacle. When these episodes happen, I do honestly worry what the bloody hell I will be like in 6 months time when DC2 arrives.

God only knows what will happen in my old age. I know it's pessimistic, but I have already resigned myself to getting some form of dementia. I figure that I have 30-odd years to keep my brain active and sharp, unless some kind of chronic traumatic encephalopathy sets in. Then I'm totally buggered.

Meh. By the time I'm 60, hopefully medical science will have mastered brain transplants. Or not...