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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think that there is far too much emphasis on alcohol?

168 replies

MycatsaPirate · 01/02/2018 15:08

It's wine o'clock. Kids playing up? have a glass of wine! Gin flavoured cheese, gin with fucking unicorn tears, prosecco everything.

I am not teetotal and I certainly had my time in my late teens when I partied hard every week and probably drank far too much at the weekends but right now it seems that drinking at home, every night is becoming the norm.

I see it constantly on here and on facebook and Instagram - photos of wine glasses, gin glasses and references to it being 'a hard day' and 'needing a drink'. Now I'm sure some of those are a one off but it seems that drinking daily, especially among women, is becoming more of a thing and it's really not very healthy!

When was the last time you had a drink? I actually can't remember but it was in December because I bought a bottle of Baileys and I think I had a glass or two on Boxing day.

Would anyone on here admit they might have a problem? I have seen a fair few people on facebook admit they were struggling to stay Dry in January and I think that's bloody sad.

OP posts:

OddBoots · 01/02/2018 15:50

I probably drink 8-10 units per year so maybe I just notice it more but people do seem to talk about alcohol a lot more these days and it is promoted on items. I don't know if that means people are actually drinking more though.

whiskyowl · 01/02/2018 15:51

"Case in point is one of my sisters who is a master at 'wine o'fucking'clock' and gets several litres of gin for her birthday from all her 'luffly' friends. Her son is 16 and is now drinking beer and whisky. He thinks it's normal to be out drinking or drinking at home all the time. And she is fine with that. I'd be bloody horrified at one of mine drinking spirits at 16 years old."

Jesus Christ, sanctimonious, much?

It's totally normal for kids to drink at 16. Chill the fuck.

mathanxiety · 01/02/2018 15:52

I think you are right that there is a cultural 'thing' happening right now. I am not in the UK but have friends and relatives there, and I see a lot of British tv. It has really struck me in the last while. Maybe you see it more at a distance?

If friends of mine started using this language where I am now, I would be concerned for them. Certainly if their children were allowed out drinking or if everyone was relaxed about them drinking at home to the point of boasting about it I would wonder if they had lost their minds.

I think that the words used to describe a night out matter. They say something about what is swirling around in the wider culture. When it becomes commonplace and acceptable to use a phrase like 'gin soaked night' that is not tongue in cheek I think a cultural phenomenon is under way, with many actually living the life.

BubblesBuddy · 01/02/2018 15:52

I do think a lot of women drink more than the recommended amounts. We have friends and I am shocked at how much they drink. It is yet another pressure on the nhs if the drink pickles their livers. Doctors say this is happening more and more. It’s no longer fun when that happens.

jarhead123 · 01/02/2018 15:53

I had a problem. For about 6 years I drank probably 40-60 units a week.

Last year I was moved onto medication for another issue, but one that I couldn't drink on. This was a relief to be honest, I HAD to stop drinking. I've since come off the medication, but also do not drink anymore.

Not drunk alcohol for a year :)

mathanxiety · 01/02/2018 15:53

It's totally normal for kids to drink at 16.

Not everywhere. Not in every family even in the UK.

Snugglepiggy · 01/02/2018 15:53

Sort of agree with you OP.I like a nice glass of wine with a meal out,at the weekend or the odd gin and tonic in the garden in the summer but something has changed IMO.When our DCS were little I never remember this 'wine o'clock' culture amongst friends, and whilst I don't FB what I do see on family links is a profusion of posts about 'fizzy Friday '.Thought recently shopping for birthday cards that a huge number of them refer to alchohol, getting drunk etc and like you wonder what influence it must have on the next generation. Call me a killjoy but I refuse to send my Dcs,neices nephews cards basically saying binge drink it's your birthday. It's a fact that wine glasses have got much bigger,we have some lovely ones from GPs and the usual size back then holds at least half the amount .After several breakages I went to get some new ones recently and they are nearly all huge by comparison.

Teapotmadam · 01/02/2018 15:53

I hate the whole mums count down the clock to alcohol time, and gin o clock, I hate that drinking is seen as something to do daily or something to do if stressed. I hate how it is seen as funny or cool.

I do drink, rarely to be honest, but I think the message put out is harmful to people, to sweep excessive drinking under the carpet and call it winding down.

My sister is a functioning alcoholic, she started off daily glasses of wine with dinner and now it's more and I know she can't stop on her own and won't get help. but being bombarded with messages saying it's ok doesn't help and justifies it in her mind that everyone does it.

DressAndGo · 01/02/2018 15:57

I agree. It's boring.

ShatnersWig · 01/02/2018 15:59

I'm with you, OP.

Clandestino · 01/02/2018 16:00

It's totally normal for kids to drink at 16. Chill the fuck.

Eh, no, it's not. We had a can of beer or a bottle of wine smuggled in our backpack for our school trip but that was a really clandestine action which made us feel very grown up and mature (stupid but hey, we were teenagers and knew it all). And I come from a country with a rather permissive attitude to alcohol.
But I never got and never saw it around like I see on the British Isles that a hen night/stag night, a wedding or a proper party have to be followed by a total hangover, otherwise you had no fun. And drinking during the weekend or even as a reward because you survived a week/an argument with your partner/a bad day at work/the day would have been unthinkable.

saltandvinegarcrisps1 · 01/02/2018 16:02

It's not a problem unless you Are in charge of infants in which case you shouldn't as much as sniff a bailies in case said infant requires emeragency transportation to a&e.

februarybluemoon · 01/02/2018 16:04

I used to drink a lot more than i do now, but was finding that i couldnt sleep after wine so been having nothing before bedtime and it does help. As i've got older i cant drink as much.

Butteredparsn1ps · 01/02/2018 16:04

I refrain from judging those who drink, and wish the same courtesy was extended to people choosing not to.

As it happens I enjoy wine, but in moderation, and I loathe the comments I get when I select a non-alcoholic drink. I'm strong enough to ignore them and stick with my choice, but I often see people being swept up in the whole "have another cheeky prosecco" wankiness.

Mamadothehump · 01/02/2018 16:07

Here we go again!!! Me?? I bloody luffs a drink. Cheers

Clandestino · 01/02/2018 16:18

What's actually wrong with criticising binge drinking?
You mentioned the glorification of alcohol and binge drinking and so many are jumping on the wagon of passive-aggressive posts filled with drink-related emojis. Why can't people accept that alcohol can be a very serious issue and you don't have to be a bum in a dirty tracksuit downing cans of cheap beer and falling over yourself on the street to have a problem with alcohol.
Btw, I once listened to a radio show where a very insulted woman was telling the public that she wasn't an alcoholic. She doesn't drink cans of beer or cheap wine. She only drinks very good and expensive wine. A bottle a day, or two when she feels like the day was hard/great. And two bottles a day during the weekend because it's her free time. And she has a job and she is a nice and educated person so she can't be an alcoholic. And I swear she wasn't a troll and she meant every single word she said. Would have been hilarious if it weren't so tragic.

MushyPeasAndPie · 01/02/2018 16:25

I like to drink alcohol. It affects no one other than myself so judge away.

OuchBollocks · 01/02/2018 16:26

Of course it can be a serious issue, I have nearly 15 years in the emergency services so I have seen over and over again how serious it can be, but the OP coming on here head tilting "oh its so saaaaad" and virtue signalling about all the dusty bottles in her cupboard isn't helping, its judging and shaming and that never helps. Anyway its hardly new is it? That's why gin was called 'mothers ruin'.

And I'm not being defensive because I have a problem. As I said, I do like a drink but within healthy levels. I can take it or leave it, and the amount of times that the kids have been driving me mad and I've said 'pass the wine' and actually had a drink I can count on, well 1 finger actually.

Bonkerz · 01/02/2018 16:29

I had a lot of gin at home Saturday night. Infact I finished a small bottle. I haven't had any alcohol yet this week but I think I will have a bottle of wine tonight. Then I might enjoy gin on Saturday again.

mathanxiety · 01/02/2018 16:30

I come from a country with a very permissive attitude toward drinking too.

I think it says something about British drinking habits when the population of my native city gradually became appalled and then absolutely disgusted by the goings on at hen and stag dos involving parties from Britain.

There was some rethinking of the marketing of the city as a destination for all and sundry near and far to come and have a good time in.

TempusEejit · 01/02/2018 16:32

I'm not a drinker (not teetotal, I enjoy alcoholic chocolates and use wine in my cooking etc). Went out the other night and was looked at like I had two heads because I was neither drinking nor driving. So yeah I get what the OP's saying. I wish we could all make our own choices without judgement from either side.

GertieMotherwell · 01/02/2018 16:34

Years ago men would go to the pub and the women stayed at home.
Rising bar prices and equality has meant that both men and women drink at home.

I like a drink and tbh, think that people’s m eating habits these days are far more of a problem than alcohol.

BettyBooJustDoinTheDoo · 01/02/2018 16:37

I hate how drink is portrayed in soap operas, particularly Eastenders, as soon as someone has the slightest issue they are at the optics of the vic and immediately down a neat vodka, it gives the image that drink makes everything better, you never see them hit the biscuit tin in times of stress! Though no doubt someone will be along in a minute to say a custard cream is far more deadly......

Worieddd · 01/02/2018 16:38

I agree

It’s quite sad really how much everything revolves around alcohol

GertieMotherwell · 01/02/2018 16:39

You could argue a custard cream is more deadly 😂

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