Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Hotel advertising their restaurant is within range of baby monitors

164 replies

Teakind · 01/02/2018 13:12

Hello,

I was looking at booking a short break in the UK and found a hotel along the south coast that offers 'baby breaks' as their rooms are close to the restaurant and so most baby monitors would work. AIBU to think this is odd and irresponsible?

I can see the argument that it's a small hotel and so the distance could be similar to being in your lounge and the baby being upstairs but it just doesn't sit comfortably with me. Any weirdo could also see parents sitting at a table with a baby monitor and know that there is a baby/child alone in a room somewhere.

Just interested to see what other people think and I do have a tendency to over worry!

OP posts:
DeleteOrDecay · 01/02/2018 15:50

YANBU that is incredibly dangerous and irresponsible.

1DAD2KIDS · 01/02/2018 15:53

Sadly if there are parents who would leave their children in a hotel room alone is it not better they do it with a child monitor?

Also altgough it's noting I would be persinally comfortable witb or advise what the difference between a baby in its cot in a close hotel room to one upstairs in its cot asleep while your down stairs watching tv?

Rumpledfaceskin · 01/02/2018 15:54

It’s a bit weird that a hotel would advertise this but I’ve left my baby in a hotel room before and had a meal, in a large hotel too. I think the risks of a criminal managing to break in to a room with an exceptionally solid heavy door out of 100’s to kidnap a baby where there happens to be a baby is virtually non existent. We did check up every 1/2 hour though and my dc is virtually guaranteed to not wake up once asleep for the night. On the other hand I would never leave a toddler roaming the house whilst I slept but apparently most on MN think that’s fine so I guess I have different risk assessment to most others on here?!

LittleLionMansMummy · 01/02/2018 16:08

I think the risks of a criminal managing to break in to a room with an exceptionally solid heavy door out of 100’s to kidnap a baby where there happens to be a baby is virtually non existent

What about a 'criminal' member of staff, who has access to booking in systems ("couple have asked for a cot and have booked dinner for 2 for 8pm") and room keys? Some people are drawn to some professions because of the access it gives them to something they want. If the 'baby breaks' are used as the hotel's selling point, then it doesn't take a genius to engineer a situation in which they will have easy access to children. I don't see paedophiles on every corner, but certain situations exist which lend themselves to abuse.

SallyLockhartsDog · 01/02/2018 16:09

I would do this but only in a dog friendly hotel where I can leave my German shepherd in the room too.

Definitely wouldn't judge someone who did this.

SallyLockhartsDog · 01/02/2018 16:10

However I also 100% agree with this Some people are drawn to some professions because of the access it gives them to something they want. If the 'baby breaks' are used as the hotel's selling point, then it doesn't take a genius to engineer a situation in which they will have easy access to children.

No CRB checks for hotel staff.

theftbyfinding · 01/02/2018 16:13

I can't imagine having a relaxing dinner, camera monitor or not. I'd have my eyes glued to it constantly. Utterly pointless risk taking as far as I'm concerned and agree with another poster, the reference to McCann's is not ludicrous. They're both a question of prioritising enjoyment and taking risks, although at least the hotel door would be locked I guess.

mirialis · 01/02/2018 16:14

I have worked in a place that had this set up - it works really well. The monitors work, the parents on the first couple of nights would take it in turns to nip back to the room to check a lot but after then would completely relax. The monitors were very sensitive to noise and had light display so everyone could see straight way if there was any movement or noise. Should add, though, that each room had two separate easy access/escape routes for fire - not a standard hotel room.

newyearsameme80 · 01/02/2018 16:16

...and the babies could take advantage of those two escape routes could they?

mirialis · 01/02/2018 16:17

Did you notice the word access as well as escape?

TotHappy · 01/02/2018 16:20

Is this better or worse than me and DH leaving our sleeping baby in her cot while we nip out in the car on an errand for 15 mins?Grin

mirialis · 01/02/2018 16:21

Plus - the legal requirements meant the whole set-up was far more guarded against fire risk than your average domestic situation. Can think of loads of my people's babies who would be at greater risk in the event of a fire in their own home, with their parents, than they were in that set up.

Rumpledfaceskin · 01/02/2018 16:34

Littlelion I do accept that criminal hotel staff would be the largest of a vanishingly small risk but surely if there’s a monitor that’s disconnected/or they heard the door go then surely the parent would rush straight up to the room thus revealing the criminal straight away. Technically possible that they could snatch a child and run (depending on where the room is located, personally the acces/exits points for fire escape would worry me more than a room where the only way out is walking past the reception desk, which ours was). But they would still be identified and search for almost immediately. If you’re someone who wants to abuse children I can’t see a job in a hotel with this system would be the best option for you. They are far more likely to work in places where they have access on a continual basis to vulnerable children/ people where they assume that abuse will go unnoticed.

newyearsameme80 · 01/02/2018 18:23

Yes I did thanks I think you would agree that getting out on your own as a baby/child is going to be a lot slower (waiting for someone to come for you) than if your parent was with you or you were with them in the restaurant.
Tothappy you should change your name to NeglectedTot if you actually did what you said - that is unconscionable.

Slarti · 01/02/2018 18:30

TotHappy - Is this better or worse than me and DH leaving our sleeping baby in her cot while we nip out in the car on an errand for 15 mins?grin

I'm not sure if this is actually serious but I hope not!

TotHappy · 01/02/2018 18:35

Yeah I did do it once, and my DH did it once.
Also did the baby monitor on hotel room thing.

EggsonHeads · 01/02/2018 18:37

I think that it depends on what kind of monitors are used. If it is just sound with no image anyone could come in and take a sleeping child. Or the child could silently suffocate. If there is an video stream then it's not so bad. Then there is the question of how long it takes to get from restaurant to rooms. If it's under a minute then it's really not any different from being at home in a different room. If it's five well then a lot can happen in five minutes. Ultimately I think it's up to parents to make the right choices not hotels.

KalaLaka · 01/02/2018 18:38

*Today 16:20 TotHappy

Is this better or worse than me and DH leaving our sleeping baby in her cot while we nip out in the car on an errand for 15 mins?grin*

Don't be daft.

HoppyHannah · 01/02/2018 18:42

Mcs didn't have a baby monitor but others in the party did. Sorry I am sure I will be banned now.

But before that happens, there are plenty of places available where you can have an early meal with your kids whether in buggies or able to sit at table. That is the best solution. It doesn't disturb the child free diners later on really. Oh dear, probably get another report. But anyway.

If people were to use monitors, the only one I would be halfway comfortable with is one with video streaming and I am sure they are available on mobile phone apps too. It is not perfect but is better than sound only in a non house situation.

The restaurant does not want noisy kids disrupting other guests. An early sitting at say 6pm would solve that.

IkeaGrinch · 01/02/2018 18:45

Wow, it’s very fortunate your child was okay Tothappy as you could well have been prosecuted had anything happened. The law states that it’s against the law to leave a child unsupervised ‘in a manner likely to cause unnecessary suffering or injury to health’ and the NSPCC advises that it’s never safe to leave babies, toddlers and very young children alone.

www.gov.uk/law-on-leaving-your-child-home-alone

I’m glad it sounds like there were no serious consequences.

ClaryFray · 01/02/2018 18:55

Maddie McCan was similar. They could see the room from the restaurant couldn't they. Yes I think one incident, if the outcome was serious enough is enough to base life choices on. This case was very serious. And a young girl lost her life because her parents fancied a steak.

Get a babysitter, or something. Don't leave them alone.

TotHappy · 01/02/2018 18:57

No, no consequences, I agree it was not my finest parenting moment though. But, I wouldn't have done it if I thought it was 'likely' to cause harm, surely it wasn't? Agree it could have caused harm if something frightful had happened at home but those scenarios are quite unlikely.

Having said all that, I am not proud of it.

theftbyfinding · 01/02/2018 18:59

ClaryFray I'm sure I read they couldn't see the room, only the living room doors. There was a back door out of view near the kids room which was unlocked/locked depending what you read. All in all, I'd say being separated by a pool and an unlocked room is less safe than the hotel room/monitor situ but I still would never relax enough to risk it. And it is a risk.

stitchglitched · 01/02/2018 19:03

Something could have happened to you TotHappy. And then your baby would have been home alone for a lot longer than 15 minutes.

AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered · 01/02/2018 19:09

Mentioning Madeleine McCann is a red herring - her parents left 3 tiny children out of baby monitor range in an unlocked appartment and only bothered to check them every 30-40 minutes. Very different to being able to hear the slightest noise from 20ft away.