To think that £20 for a night of babysitting is ridiculous

[Holly102]

My DD (who is 16) babysat for a local mum, I have known for a few years from my DS’s school.

She asked me, on Monday, if my DD would do her a massive favour and babysit for a couple of hours on the Tuesday as her usual babysitter had cancelled last minute. She offered to pick her up and drop her back as it wouldn’t be late . She told me it would be 7 until 9.

So yesterday evening DD was collected at around 7. I texted her at 9 asking if she was on her way home but she wasn’t so I told her to message the mum. No response.

At quarter to eleven my daughter gets a message apologising but does she mind if she stays until around 11:30. It was a Tuesday night, DD is 16!!!! My DD, being young, felt she couldn’t say no.

This is not the end of the story though, the mum finally arrived home at 12:30!!! Far from the 9 o’clock first agreed. She apologised profusely but the proceeded to pay DD only £20.

Is this completely unfair behaviour. Is £20 what my daughter should expect?

The odd time 15y dd has babysit she had been given £20 for the evening - approx 7:30/8pm to midnight, at a weekend. She's 'put' one child to bed - as in remind them to brush teeth, read a story and turn lights out and told the other to head to bed/sleep - ages 6/7 and 9/10 I think they are. She then has spent the evening watching TV/Netflix, having a soft drink or two and snacks provided for her, and chatting to friends via Snapchat, etc.

For us, £20 seemed very reasonable and actually, as we often know the parents, have said that that amount is more than enough and DD doesn't need more.

I'd be cross with the parent coming home so late on a school night though, and would be saying no in future.

Horrible to stay out so much later without warning. Also £20 - for 7-12:30 is tight I think... We pay babysitters £10 per hour, £12.50 after midnight. I guess they are qualified (nursery staff) rather than teenagers though.

Sorry, there’s only one way the pay can be wrong.

That’s when she gets paid less than the AGREED rate.

No matter how casual the arrangement, no matter who is involved or how last-minute, you need to specify your price for a service. Before starting the job.

Who’s to know what’s ‘normal’ in another person’s mind, or the ‘average’ in a given neighbourhood, or whether seemingly decent folk are actually CFs underneath?

That’s why you always answer ‘Can you do xxx job?’ with ‘Possibly, as long as you understand that I charge xx per hour and don’t work past xx o’clock’. Sixteen is not too young to get this basic principle, surely?

pet they don’t of course but it’s a competitive market and I agree it’s crazy

Most are suggesting that £5 an hour is reasonable, fair enough but 7-12.30 makes it £27.50 so £30 would have been fairer especially with the fact she was 3 1/2 hours late.

Agree with everyone else. It's the lateness that's the problem, rather than the fee.

I wonder if this is why the usual babysitter cancelled?

We’rein London and paid our 16 yr old baby sitter £5 an hour rounded up. But we were never later than 9.30 on a school night of 10.30-11 on a weekend which was always agreed in advance with her and her parents.

To be frank after 11.30 I think you should have called the mother and I would have told her what I thought of her when she dropped my daughter back.

I'd say something to the Mum. £20 for 5 and 1/2 hours is a complete puss take and being 3 and 1/2 hours late is obnoxious.

I tell the Mum that your DD was too shy to say anything but she charges £5 hour and double after midnight. Don't let your DD be taken advantage of.

Fucking hell. At 16 I was out getting smashed in clubs and getting lifts home off bouncers at 4am on Thursday nights.

Why is everyone so precious about 11.30pm and 16? She wasn't stood at a bus stop in freezing fog or anything.

£10ph is more then my husband earns in a physical job oh my goodness being late was unfair tho!

Wayyyyyy underpaid. We pay at least £8 SW London

I am by how many people there are that think that £20 for 7-12.30 inc. putting kids to bed is reasonable!

So she got paid £20 - but - instead of 7-9 she babysat 7-12.30 and ended up babysitting for 5½ hours instead of 2 - giving her £3.60 per hour which is pretty low

Yes I think that is very tight and they should have paid a lot more for messing her around

Have never paid less than £8 per hour. Incidentally we were recently in the US and a 14yr old babysitter there charged us $20 per hour!

I can't believe the amount of posters that think 7-12:30 and being paid £20 because she's 16 is ok? Good God I babysat aged 14 in the early 80's from 7-11 and got that - how cheap some people put a price on those looking after their children

She took the absolute lend OP and I would certainly be having words as in never ask my daughter to babysit again. Disgusting behaviour.

My 16 yr old would be more than happy to get £20 for a night sitting on the sofa.
No crying babies. No changing nappies. No feeding. Just sitting there - able to get on with homework or watch TV or read or faff about on the internet.
I would be chuffed she was collected and dropped home.
The issue here though is the changing times. If she was only expecting to be there until 9pm, then not returning until 12.30 is completely unacceptable.

@TrinitySquirrel

Fucking hell. At 16 I was out getting smashed in clubs and getting lifts home off bouncers at 4am on Thursday nights.

Woop de bastard doo for you. Give yourself a massive medal for being a total fucking piss head at 16 and rolling in at 4am every weekend.

MOST 16 year olds don't do this, so stop being so pedantic and ridiculous.

Why is everyone so precious about 11.30pm and 16? She wasn't stood at a bus stop in freezing fog or anything

And no-one is being 'precious.' It was RUDE for the woman to be 2 hours later than planned. And inconsiderate too.

Jobs like these are a great opportunity for a young person to learn how to behave in the workplace. When my dd started babysitting I strongly suggested to her that she specify a rate beforehand and only take the job once a rate was agreed which was acceptable to both parties. Otherwise, she's at the mercy of whatever the other person feels like paying. That's no way to conduct a business relationship.

My dd was nervous about discussing money and asked me to do it on her behalf, but I told her it was her responsibility. If she is old enough to do a job, she's old enough to negotiate over pay. That can be a difficult skill, but that's all the more reason to start young.

For my dd, staying out late was never an issue as she didn't have to get up early the next morning. But for most young people, this too should be part of the agreement. In your dd's case, it sounds like there was an understanding that the job would finish around 9pm and the mum broke that agreement big-time.

It seems to me that as the parent, your role isn't to take your acquaintance to task yourself, but to encourage and advise your dd on doing so. Her expectations and this mum's expectations on pay and timekeeping seem miles apart, so there's no point in doing any more babysitting for her.

how cheap some people put a price on those looking after their children

No...personally I'd never want an unqualified, inexperienced teenager looking after my kids at night, even if it only cost £1 an hour.

BUT...for someone that does want to use a teenager, I think £20 for these hours is reasonable.

I think the saying 'pay peanuts get monkeys' needs reversing in this situation. As in, if I was going to choose a 'monkey' for the job (unqualified teen)...then yeah, I'd expect to be paying peanuts.

£8 for our neighbour's teenager, £10 for their nursery teacher. But sooo cheeky to be late!

I think the saying 'pay peanuts get monkeys' needs reversing in this situation. As in, if I was going to choose a 'monkey' for the job (unqualified teen)...then yeah, I'd expect to be paying peanuts.

Fortunately the babysitter in the OP wasn't a monkey - rather a young girl taken advantage of by a piss taking parent who obviously couldn't give a crap who was looking after her child while she was out - 7-1230? really? and agreed from 7-9? That, IMO, is a parent who doesn't give a natch about their children and OP is absolutely morally right to be disgusted at a measly £20

Money sounds ok to me but I am in a deeply rural part of the country and London is only a place on the telly. The lateness on a school night would be a deal breaker for me though.

But I have to ask... on what planet are people paying a teenager £10 an hour to lie on the sofa, eat their biscuits and use their wifi??? This is more than registered childminders get for racing around after wide awake children - and plenty of other adults with real jobs earn less too.

DD gets £10 an hour before midnight and £20 after plus a cab home. London, but the families she babysits for are American expats.

Teenage babysitters where we are (south) are £4 or 5 per hour - it's easy money really (assuming most kids are average and not horrifically behaved). The issue here was the lateness and that is unacceptable on a school night unless agreed beforehand.

I might quit my day job at some of the baby sitting rates you lot are offering.

£20 is reasonable for an evenings babysitting. But the lateness and crap communication is not.