AIBU to get involved? - Bullying at school.

[Bearlover16]

My DD is in year 6. The girls in her class have kind of split into 2 groups and she doesn't quite 'fit in' with either. They can be really quite mean and nasty to her. She's in a 'year 6 group chat on watsapp and has had a few problems with some of the girls. She posted a link to her musically account asking people to follow her to which she was met with replies of "why would anyone want to follow you" etc.

Tonight, after she'd gone to bed her phone was pinging away so I checked the messages and they (boys included) were havibg a right old slagging match about her so I put a message on the group saying I was her mother and I was monitoring all these messages and I would be speaking to the school/parents tomorrow. They all denied any bullying went silent and some have subsequently left the group. Ive screen shotted some of the messages.

I was going to speak to a couple of the parents tomorrow that I know...in a friendly way obviously. Would you appreciate being told if your child had been making another childs life miserable?

Will I be seen as an interfering so and so?
For the record my daughter knows I sent the message as she heard all the pinging. Shes fine with me being involved. I was bullied terribly at school and I don't want her to go through the same. Ive told her to leave the group after I have spoken to school about it. (Not that I'm expecting much from school).

Good that your daughter now knows you have her back and she was probably relieved you got involved

On a side note something similar happened in DDs class and several kids were involved however they didn't contact the parents and let them know what had gone on - pity really

o gosh sorry - wrong thread

Well done. You did absolutely the right thing. I would have done the same.

good outcome, well done to HT

Far too young. She shouldn't have it in the first place. Ditch it. Maybe we're at the same school? We've had several emails in the past two weeks from exasperated teachers reminding us of the age restrictions of these things. I'm sure the teachers must curse it. Behaviour like this is wrong and upsetting but really you've left her vulnerable to it. Why should the teachers have to sort it out? It's not happening in school. Have a word with the parents if you must buy you're better off coming off SM until she's older.

Unkindness, exclusion and bullying outside of school via social media takes up more of our time in our school than the problems that occur when the children are actually with us. And Years 5 - 8 are the worst for it. School has to deal with it because we're the common link between the children concerned but it's not our fault and it drives me mad. We tell children and parents till we're blue in the face that social media is a bad idea for children/young teens and isn't even allowed before 12/13 but it doesn't seem to make any difference.

Because of the number of horror situations I've had to unpick over the last few years there is no way my Year 6 daughter (a pupil at the school so I've seen what her friends go through with it) is having a phone, iPad etc until she is 13. My eldest (now 15) got a phone to go to fo her senior school commute with at 13 and started using social media last year. I think she was just about old enough to handle it. I wouldn't have wanted it for her any younger.

Wish we had your head here when mine were small!

I'm very impressed with your HT, very proactive. Too many bullies face no consequences and just don't learn. The damage is awful, I was a child that was bullied, and my DD1 has suffered low level bullying.

Well done, OP, hope it gets better for your DD now.

@Bearlover16 - you have just taught your dd an invaluable lesson - that you will back her up and support her, if she is bullied. As a victim of bullying, whose mum did absolutely nothing to support or help her, I can tell you how important that is. You are a hero.