Just opened our credit card statement

[Mooycow]

And am so shocked , it’s over 25.000, ! My husband deals with all the bills ( I do everything else) ,he gets online billing and tears up the statement when it arrives , we have together spent the money ,it’s all way too easy ,obs, AIBU to be shocked that we owe that amount .

Don’t get me wrong , we live well ,,obs too well, I’m not stupid I am fully aware of the money being spent , I was unaware of the large debt being accrued, I guess mostly I am shocked that we have run up such a large debt and thinking we were doing ok .
Was kidding about the holiday btw .

Could you not just put the Caribbean holiday on the credit card?

Well you would think that was obvious.. tsk

Wow - in my world a credit card is just for emergenices and we pay off the same month. The high intrest rates just arent worth the card tbh. £25k is fine as long as you can pay it off in the same month it was spent tbh.

First things first. Take the card and cut the cunt up. Time to stop using it.

We live well

Clearly

OP you don't live well. You can't afford everyday stuff.

Will have to cancel the Caribbean holiday this year ... baha hahaha!

This amount of debt would terrify me. Can you pay it back or not. Whose name is the card in?

Why do people live beyond their means? If you can't afford it, don't buy it. Simples. I use a credit card but never spend on it if I don't have enough in my current account to pay it off in full each month. I only really use it for online shopping. I can understand using it in an emergency perhaps, but £25K?!!

The interest racking up on this debt will not be pretty. I agree that it’s probably best not to add to it now you know about it! This would give me sleepless nights. Good luck, and I would have a little chat with DH too.

Were the bathroom tiles made of gold or something. How on earth can you run up £25k without even noticing. You need to do some reading up on money management. You sound absolutely clueless. Do you even know the amount of interest you're paying each month. The interest alone would probably pay for your Caribbean holiday.

£25,000!! My head would EXPLODE. What if you lose your jobs? What if one, or God forbid, both of you fall ill? That 25,000 could spiral out of control and ruin you. You need to get this sorted, ASAP. Perhaps it's time to stop living so "well."

Lougle

Comments noted

I use a credit card to my advantage, pay it off every month.

If I do the maths and the figures don’t add up, I either delay the purchase or save up for it.

Read and seen far too many people living the dream, until those nice people say no, then their world implodes.

Credit cards are useful but the money has to be paid back.

It's lovely to see how inclusive Mumsnet is, what with the one percenters being on here and all.

Apologies, OP, if this is a genuine concern. In which case, you need to take a pair of scissors to OH's card.

Entirely depends if you can afford the debt or not.

You were spending too and had no idea that it wasn’t being paid for? Of course you are being unreasonable. That your husband deals with paying the bill is no excuse, clearly that’s not something he is able to do.

If you have a good morgage rate then I would be looking into exending it, paying off the CC and cancelling it as you are clearly (as a couple, not blaming you alone) not managing with easy access to borrowed money.

*mortgage

The OP says they both spent it.

I think it's quite possible to run up significant debt over a period of time if you're not monitoring it but usually over several cards.

If you can't afford to pay for a car servicing, you can't afford a 25k debt on a credit card.

You need to educate yourself about money management (MSE already linked to is the place to do this). You also need to take an active interest in the household bills, know who your utility suppliers are, what direct debits are going out each month, and how much they are.

The fact that your husband hasn't mentioned the amount of debt you have, and that he tears up the statements, so you've never seen them now, is worrying. Have you never asked how much you owe on the credit card?
It's all very well living in blissful ignorance of money matters, but this is how problems arise.

Have you spoken to him about this yet?

Do you (both) have savings, OP? If so, you could use some of them to pay off the card, or some of it.
The interest rate you get on savings is likely to be much less than the interest charged on the card.
If you don't have savings you could use, and you are not making significant payments towards this debt, then you definitely can't afford it.

OP: We have had the card over 5 years, it’s things like big sums of money like car services , tiles for bathroom that sort of thing , but I thought we paid it off each month, considering he is so hot on making sure the mortgage is fixed rate , best rates for gas etc , I am genuinely shocked , we can afford the repayments and he has been making above the minimum payments . Might have to forgo the Caribbean holiday again this year .

So you are saying the last sentence is a joke. Does not sound like a joke tagged on to the end of the first sentence.

What do you mean again. What was the reason you did not go on your Caribbean holiday before this time - did you know you were already in serious enough debt to forgo a big holiday, in which case perhaps it is not such a big shock as you make it out to be when you opened your credit card statement.

If you do everything else, do you not know your and dh's take home pay and get an idea how close you are to the limit every month?

It does not make any sense to say your dh is careful with getting the best deal but at the same time does not mind credit card debt piling up to this degree. That would be completely out of character. The interest on a credit card is astronomical. If he really went for the best deal, you would not have the card for 5 years. Your dh would have been chasing 0% deals.

This all sounds like a likely tale from someone who is actually clueless about finances and should choose a better subject to weave deceit.