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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be livid!

54 replies

Spicylolly · 27/01/2018 15:22

AIBU to be livid about smoking around my DD? She's doing voluntary work at the local charity shop (she's 13 nearly 14) for her D of E.

The shop has always stunk of fags but I put that down to the donated clothes. But she returned today complaining that a member of staff told them her to leave the kitchen if she didn't like fags then promptly lit up, this member of staff has several fag breaks in the kitchen, which explains the stink in the shop.
The manager also smokes but goes outside through fire exit to puff away, which is right next to the kitchen.
I'm proper fuming, I'm not being OTT am i? It's illegal for a start but I don't want my daughter to breathe in skanky second hand smoke. And before anyone says it, no she's not making it up to cover for trying them herself. She hates smoking with a passion, her Dad has the occasional fag and she gets really upset by it.

I don't want to report a charity and get them a massive fine but at the same time I want them to know it's not bloody on in this day and age to smoke in a shop and especially smoking around kids. Do I email head office, message the manager directly or just report them?

My daughter doesn't want me to say anything as she has quite a few more hours to complete there, I feel I need to say something but don't want to make things awkward for her either.
WWYD?

OP posts:
UgandanKnuckles · 27/01/2018 15:23

Isn't it illegal for them to be smoking inside like that?

Original poster
Spicylolly · 27/01/2018 15:25

Yes it is illegal and carries a hefty fine.

OP posts:
MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 27/01/2018 15:26

I'd let her finish the hours, then I'd grass them up.

RainyApril · 27/01/2018 15:27

I would email their head office and leave them to deal with it. I know you could report them but, being a charity, I think I'd give them the opportunity to put it right themselves first.

Aquamarine1029 · 27/01/2018 15:28

I would report them without hesitation. Inconsiderate, stupid twats.

NoNoCharlieRascal · 27/01/2018 15:30

I would grass them. All of their items will stink. Children's clothes and toys reeking of smoke. Grim.

Original poster
Spicylolly · 27/01/2018 15:30

Just like to add it's a big well known charity, not just a little independant one. Not that that should make any difference. I was just wondering if I was being OTT because it's my precious DD.

OP posts:
IThinkSoYes · 27/01/2018 15:33

Can you see the kitchen from the shop? If so, could you pretend you're just a regular customer who happened to notice the staff member smoking, rather than it being traceable back to your daughter?

Sitranced · 27/01/2018 15:39

I'd report without hesitation. The law was brought in to protect those at work from being subjected to second hand smoke.

isseywithcats · 27/01/2018 15:39

I work in a charity shop and no way would anyone including the manager be allowed to smoke anywhere inside the shop, we have to go outside and round the corner into another street to be able to have a cig break, and if its a good shop the sorters should have weeded out and ragged any clothes that come out of bags smelling of cig smoke, mould, damp any nasty niffs, as charity shops are more like retail units nowadays than the old system where nearly everything went out unironed stinky and with holes etc, definitely report this to their head office, as someone suggested say you are a customer who has noticed staff smoking in the kitchen area inside the shop,

turophile · 27/01/2018 15:42

Definitely report it, but to head office. I wouldn't bother saying anything to the manager as they are clearly allowing it and it would make things awkward for your daughter.

k2p2k2tog · 27/01/2018 15:44

That's outrageous. I volunteer in a charity shop which is part of a large chain and we have very strict no smoking policies. There are one or two volunteers who smoke and they have to go outside, even if it's pissing it down with rain. All big charities will have anti-smoking policies and the manager and volunteers will know that they shouldn't be doing it.

In your shoes I'd phone the store and ask to speak to the manager. Tell him/her what your child has told you, and tell them that you want them to stop people from smoking inside the shop. If it continues, report to the Head Office trading division.

Mumsymcmumface · 27/01/2018 15:45

I despise smoking. Filthy habit and it killed my Dad before I was ever and adult, and all four of my grandparents before I was five.

Couldn’t get wound up about this though. The amount of smoke even if she sat in the kitchen with the smoker will be minute compared to the diesel fumes she breathes everyday and certainly compared to the second hand smoke I had inhaled by the time the smoking ha was introduced.

At the worst, she is dealing with an unpleasant smell, that’s all.

NeganLovesLucille · 27/01/2018 15:47

Report to head office. Your daughter should do her volunteering elsewhere. I would have my DD working around smoke. It's awful.

NeganLovesLucille · 27/01/2018 15:48

would not. ooops

RoseNarene · 27/01/2018 15:50

YANBU.

It's illegal and gross. Grass them up to head office and like someone else said, get DD to finish her D of E volunteering elsewhere.

chickenowner · 27/01/2018 15:53

Please report them to the charity's head office. You are definitely not over-reacting.

DriggleDraggle · 27/01/2018 15:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheBrilliantMistake · 27/01/2018 15:57

Report them. You are not causing them to get a fine, they are.

sallyarmy1 · 27/01/2018 15:58

I am the assistant manager of a well know charity shop branch.

It is definitely illegal and definitely needs reporting. Not only is it a health & safety issue, it is a fire risk.

Report straight to Head office - google the charity and you may even get an email address, as well as the phone number.

And remove your daughter - you have a very valid reason to give, to any authority that asks why.

WheresTheHooferDoofer · 27/01/2018 15:58

If the shop is always reeking of fags, then this smell will also be getting on the clothes, meaning that the charity may well be losing out on sales. I certainly wouldn't buy clothes that smelled.

Ericaequites · 27/01/2018 15:59

Your child is nearly old enough for paid work in the States; one can have working papers at fourteen. My father and many of his peers were smoking regularly at that age. Many of my peers (b. 1970) were smoking occasionally at that age. Your daughter needs to be less of a snowflake and suck it up. Smoking is bad for you, but being in the presence of an occasional cigarette isn't the end of the world.

WheresTheHooferDoofer · 27/01/2018 16:02

erica smokng is banned in shops in the UK, and also in all places of work. This ban even extends to cars used for work purposes.

And if this shop is reeking, it isn't just an occasional fag.

Womble75 · 27/01/2018 16:04

Your child is nearly old enough for paid work in the States; one can have working papers at fourteen. My father and many of his peers were smoking regularly at that age. Many of my peers (b. 1970) were smoking occasionally at that age. Your daughter needs to be less of a snowflake and suck it up. Smoking is bad for you, but being in the presence of an occasional cigarette isn't the end of the world.

Apart from the fact it's ILLEGAL ffsHmm

TheBrilliantMistake · 27/01/2018 16:05

Ericaquites,

They used to say that about asbestos, and countless other pollutants.
In the UK it's against the law, and she's is also a minor. They have a duty of care towards her.
Her daughter has clearly taken an initiative by telling her mother, and rightly so, her mother is now doing the right thing in supporting her.

'Just suck it up'? really?

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