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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To feel shaken after today's events

41 replies

BroomHandledMouser · 25/01/2018 20:05

My DD 6 went into hospital today for a routine op.

She came round and everything was ok. She was a bit aggravated but eventually calmed down, had something to eat and went off to play.

We were literally putting her cost on when she half collapsed. I thought she was messing about (which now I feel like utter shit about so please don't have a go)

She started sweating profusely and went a funny grey colour. Luckily the nurse was with us about to discharge us so she whipped her on the bed and stared doing obs.

Her blood pressure was really low and she was in and out of consciousness. Her temp had spiked and they called the doctor down to give her a once over.

She eventually came too and within 40 minutes she was eating a KitKat with rosy cheeks.

It was honestly the worst hour of my fucking life. I've never seen my daughter go from happy to 'Jesus Christ WTF' in all my life and I never want to again.

I feel like a twat. I've had 3/4 of a bottle of wine and I'm checking on her every 2 minutes like a precious snowflake.

I have the absolute maximum respect to ANY parent who has to endure seeing their child in hospital on a regular basis. The pain and worry you must feel I can't even put into words. You have my love xx

OP posts:

Gazelda · 25/01/2018 20:12

That sounds scary! I'm not surprised you're shaken.

Be glad that the nurse reacted so quickly, and your dd was soon in the mend.

I hope the op was a success and this is soon behind you.

But can I (gently) comment that maybe a large quantity of wine wasn't the wisest decision if you're still fretting that she needs further monitoring? The alcohol will inhibit your reactions if she needs you.

ShastaTrinity · 25/01/2018 20:12

It's horrific, why on earth do you feel like a twat!

It would be terrible if you didn't feel anything seeing your child like this. Glad she is ok now, but be kind to yourself. It is one of the worst possible thing that can happen to you, of course you are shaken.

MrsPreston11 · 25/01/2018 20:17

SO glad she’s ok.

And you are NOT being unreasonable.

I wouldn’t be leaving my child’s side for days if that’s had happened. You check on her all you like.

I’d probably lie awake listening for each breath sleep on her floor tonight.

Ummmmgogo · 25/01/2018 20:17

my 5 year old is always fake collapsing, completely understandable that you though she was messing about x

Tinysarah1985 · 25/01/2018 20:17

A similar thing happened to my sister when i’d picked her up from having her tonsills out. We’d just got into the main area of the hospital and she said “i feel really hot” and the next thing she had just slumped to the ground, grey as anything, sweating and non responsive. Got her back to the ward and they said its quite a common reaction. She was fine after another few hours and it was becaue her bp had dropped very low. She was 18 at the time but 12 years later I still remember it.

Original poster

BroomHandledMouser · 25/01/2018 20:18

I know it's not the most sensible thing to do. I lost my beautiful nana this week too - I honestly couldn't make this shitty week up!

I feel like a twat because people have it so much worse. We walked through the main ward my daughter was walking and starting to feel better.

Some of the mums and children in there can only dream of that

OP posts:

TrinitySquirrel · 25/01/2018 20:18

Yeah drinking the wine wasn't the smartest idea.

for your daughter and you

Doobydoo · 25/01/2018 20:20

Poor you. I am a Paediatric Nurse and it has been no use whatsoever when my children have had to go in to hospital.I know the fear!

user764329056 · 25/01/2018 20:21

You deserve wine, what a bad time, hope you relax

Angelicinnocent · 25/01/2018 20:21

Regular occurrence with DD. She has a long term condition which strikes every couple of months and has for last 5 years.

Even knowing what to expect, I'm still shakey by the time she is over the worst and do tend to be over cautious with her and end up spoiling her when she recovers.

I am not surprised you are being a bit snowflake about it but it doesn't make you a twat, it makes you her mum. Give yourself a break but I would stay clear of the wine for another 24 hours just in case.

taskmaster · 25/01/2018 20:23

Drink all the fucking wine you want OP, it's not for anyone here to judge.

I've been there more times than I can count. I've had to sit on the floor in a hospital corridor while a surgeon told me that I should prepare myself for the worst...(which somehow did not happen, but there were many many more bad days to come)

It's fucking horrible. But you're all good now, so focus on that.

formerbabe · 25/01/2018 20:24

That sounds terrifying...you must be a bit shell shocked...have some

Original poster

BroomHandledMouser · 25/01/2018 20:25

I just love MN - I'm giving you all very un-mumsnetty snogs right now

OP posts:

DesignedForLife · 25/01/2018 20:30

The exact same happened to me when I was 12 and had General anaesthetic. Recovered well, allowed to go home and passed out before I got out the ward doors. I was totally fine after that if it's any consolation? I do tend to suffer from low blood pressure as an adult though.

Blackteadrinker77 · 25/01/2018 20:32

So sorry for your loss x

I'd have been terrified if it was my daughter too.

brizzledrizzle · 25/01/2018 20:35

ignore what people are saying about not having wine, only perfect parents or ones used to having DCs in and out of hospital would think of not having wine.

I hope your daughter is OK.

Witchend · 25/01/2018 20:39

I did that when having had a mole removed in early teens. Dm shouted at me to sit down, and I couldn't think what she was saying.

Ds fainted during a blood test. Mind you, he was insisting on watching the blood come out and asking for information about all sorts of things. Then his sisters nearly fainted when he repeated all the information back to them with extra details.

Emmageddon · 25/01/2018 20:39

What a nasty shock, I'm not surprised you needed a drink! Glad she's okay now. Sorry to hear you lost your nana this week to, enjoy your wine

GrouchyKiwi · 25/01/2018 20:40

Please don't feel like a twat. That must have been terrifying.

Be kind to yourself. I hope your DD is better soon.

So sorry for your loss.

Mogginthemog · 25/01/2018 20:44

Goodness me. The last thing you should feel is that you are a twat. That must have been a dreadful shock. Thank goodness she’s ok but how petrifying to see her suddenly faint like that. Knowing that other people have it worse is no consolation at such a time. It doesn’t make what you went through any less awful. Be kind to yourself and get some more wine down you.

TwitterQueen1 · 25/01/2018 20:47

OP, I can do without the snog thank you very much I suspect you meant hugs....

I think this kind of collapse is quite common - I know I've had it a couple of times though it is obviously very scary. The 1st time - DD3 promptly threw up all over me and then fainted. I had to strip and go to the car park in a hospital gown to get my gym clothes. bleugh.

The second time, DD2 collapsed and fainted and we then had to sit and wait another 2 hours until her blood pressure became normal once more.

Third time was with me. It was the hottest day of the year - last August - air conditioning was maxing out, awful heat. Except I was freezing cold (coming round from day op) and had to have hot air pumped into my blankets, plus oxygen, plus lots of fuss.

Enjoy the wine. It's OK. It happens.

FlyingElbows · 25/01/2018 20:50

There is nothing worse or more terrifying than when something happens to your child and it's beyond your ability to sort. It's awful. You're not any sort of twat, you've had a fright which I think we can all understand. Don't be hard on yourself.

TheDevilMadeMeDoIt · 25/01/2018 20:50

Horrible for you OP, and it will hang over you (if, given the wine, hang over is quite the right phrase) for a long time.

But please don't make a big deal of it to your DD. It could start her worrying about what might have happened to her.

I hope you manage some sleep tonight

Findingross · 25/01/2018 20:53

I collapsed just after I had my tonsils out. The one and only time that I’ve fainted.

Completely understand your reaction - my daughter has been hospitalised three times, one of those with sepsis. Watching her eyes roll back in her head will never leave me.

She’s a happy, bouncy 14 year old now, but my fear of losing her is etched in my memory.

Enjoy your wine, now you are safe in your home but remember to give yourself a little tlc and proper rest too.

yummumto3girls · 25/01/2018 20:54

Agree, not sensible to be drinking, what if she has another turn, an ambulance can’t get there and you need to drive her, or be super alert.... hope she is ok, sounds very scary. X

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