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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To feel shaken after today's events

41 replies

BroomHandledMouser · 25/01/2018 20:05

My DD 6 went into hospital today for a routine op.

She came round and everything was ok. She was a bit aggravated but eventually calmed down, had something to eat and went off to play.

We were literally putting her cost on when she half collapsed. I thought she was messing about (which now I feel like utter shit about so please don't have a go)

She started sweating profusely and went a funny grey colour. Luckily the nurse was with us about to discharge us so she whipped her on the bed and stared doing obs.

Her blood pressure was really low and she was in and out of consciousness. Her temp had spiked and they called the doctor down to give her a once over.

She eventually came too and within 40 minutes she was eating a KitKat with rosy cheeks.

It was honestly the worst hour of my fucking life. I've never seen my daughter go from happy to 'Jesus Christ WTF' in all my life and I never want to again.

I feel like a twat. I've had 3/4 of a bottle of wine and I'm checking on her every 2 minutes like a precious snowflake.

I have the absolute maximum respect to ANY parent who has to endure seeing their child in hospital on a regular basis. The pain and worry you must feel I can't even put into words. You have my love xx

OP posts:

SandunesAndRainclouds · 25/01/2018 20:56

You’re right OP, people do have worse but it’s all relative isn’t it. That was your worst right there in that moment. I’m not surprised you’re shaken up! Check on your precious little person as much as you need

Ofthread · 25/01/2018 20:56

It sounds like a fainting episode, I’ve had this happen to me. It looks very alarming to those around. You didn’t do anything wrong at all.

colouringinagain · 25/01/2018 20:58

.... You get a taxi.

Completely get what you're saying OP it's so scary. I've been there. Be kind to yourself.

mommybear1 · 25/01/2018 20:58

You did nothing wrong hugs to you and your DD hope she is better soon

MadMags · 25/01/2018 21:01

I’m sure OP wouldn’t be drinking the wine if someone wasn’t there to help get dd to the hospital, folks!

She’s just gotten her home and is understandably shaken.

Hope she’s ok, OP. It really is just awful having a child sick like that.

Titsywoo · 25/01/2018 21:02

It definitely happens quite a lot. DH had a minor op and was up and about not long after and said he was fine to go home. His friend picked him up and drove him home. By the time he dropped him off his friend had to basically carry him up the driveway and he was grey and looked like he was about to die. I shat myself but when I called the hospital they said it was just a drop in blood pressure because he was up and about too soon and that it would be fine. Don't worry OP she'll be ok :)

MiddlingMum · 25/01/2018 21:03

Poor you, it's really scary when they are ill and you don't know what's happening. I have a friend who was a paedriatric nurse. She could cope with anything with her patients, no matter how ill they were, but fell apart if one of her own got so much as a graze.

Check on your DD all night if you feel you need to, and treat yourself gently too.

mrsmrsmrsmrsmrs · 25/01/2018 21:05

So sorry for your loss and you are not being a twat; what a scary time and thankfully she collapsed at that time

Stay close to her and eat some carbs - you will wake up and be alert if she needs you

Look after yourself too and sleep well to both of you

youarenotkiddingme · 25/01/2018 21:08

Ds had a faint after his blood tests recently.

He was complaining of headache and I was telling him to get a grip and I'd get him a twin and lemonade from shop. As we walked through reception he announced couldn't see. As I manhandled him through doors he collapsed

Whole scene then unfolded as ds has myoclonus when his muscles relax - and we were there seeing specialist neurologist for further investigations!

I did apologise to him (ds that is) afterwards!

PavoReal · 25/01/2018 21:08

I was down minor injuries dept today, DS 6 fell at school and had a huge half egg on the back of his head. Driving him to hospital was pretty awful as he kept half nodding off. Wish I’d got a taxi as I couldn’t concentrate on the road and him. He’s fine, mild concussion but OP you wine it up like a bastard my friend. I’d be in a taxi if I had to go back tonight.

Shufflebumnessie · 25/01/2018 21:11

I'm so sorry to hear that you and your daughter have had such a traumatic day. It's absolutely terrifying to see your child in that kind of situation, when you have no control over what's happening.

When DS contracted Bacterial Meningitis a few years ago I remember feeling so helpless, not knowing what was going to happen and being completely unable to do anything to make the situation better. I have never been so terrified in my life. The night he came out of hospital I moved in to his room (I would have slept in his cot with him if i'd fit in it!!) and didn't move out for weeks.

I hope your daughter is on the road to recovery and that you're starting to feel a little better too .

TheFirstMrsDV · 25/01/2018 21:23

Dont feel bad about being upset. Don't compare yourself and your DD's situation to others. There is no point.
Its perfectly natural to be shaken up. I always advise people to really go over what happened and talk about it. Don't store it up.

I hope your DD is ok and you get some sleep.

I was one of 'those' parents. I wouldn't ever expect a parent of a 'well' child to brush off such a horrible incident.

PutUpWithRain · 25/01/2018 21:37

Oh, OP... You must have been bloody terrified! I burst into tears when DS (then 4) had to have a teeny tiny operation under GA - seeing him slip under so quickly scared the shit out of me, and I was prepared for it! One of the nurses handed me some tissues, and when I tearfully said 'sorry!' murmured 'it's ok, every parent reacts the same way because it is scary.'

Big un Mumsnetty hugs to you. Hope your DD makes an excellent recovery xx

tracymars · 25/01/2018 21:43

I've fainted twice in my life. Once when I was having blood taken. My friend was in the room and she said it was comig out really slowly, I said "I feel faint" and then went really stiff and fainted. I still remember my arm getting tighter and tighter. It's hard to find a vein on me. I prefer seeing a phlebotomist as that's their job so they will be more experienced than nurses who do it less often, alongside all their other jobs.
Second time was just after I had a smear test. Smear tests are difficult and a bit traumatic for me. The nurse was taking my blood pressure when it happenned. She said that she had been having trouble getting a reading (probably because it had dropped pre faint).

Have to say though. After I fainted I felt strangely refreshed and energised. Like I'd had a really nice little sleep.

moosemama · 25/01/2018 21:48

OP, please be kind to yourself. Having your child in hospital for any reason is stressful enough, without them collapsing. It’s must have been a really horrible shock for you.

Ds2 has a condition which causes him to collapse a lot - I have the same condition and completely understand what is happening, how to deal with it and that he’s not in any danger - yet every single time it happens it knocks the wind out of my sails and leaves me shaken - and he’s a strapping great 13 year old.

(Mind you, he does have a penchant for doing it at the top of the stairs and falling top to bottom as a result - which does up the stress factor somewhat!)

HaudYerWheeshtBawbag · 25/01/2018 21:49

I personally would not be drinking, if my child had surgery and also a fainting spell afterwards, however each to there own.

Your reaction is normal OP, its also quite common after surgery, I hope your daughter makes a speedy recovery

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