The one moment that might have changed your life direction

[GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz]

I'm sure we all have one.

A moment we think back to and made a decision - maybe it seemed full of meaning then or maybe it seemed insignificant at the time.

But you can't help but look back on that moment as the moment when things were to go one way or another.

Mine:

There was a huge complicated backstory to my relationship with this man.

We were in the south of france at the time. That afternoon a decade ago now he asked me to go with him to biarritz that same night. I only had a few hours to think and I chose not to.

I wonder just how different things would be if I'd said yes, for better or worse.

Complicated friendship with a man from work (EA I suppose - I was single, he was in a long term relationship - no kids- he suspected she was cheating) .. we'd agreed to go to the pub after work one night (we'd been before)

I changed my mind at the last minute... said it was time we stayed apart before one of us got hurt. I didn't wait for a reply. I just went for my train and I assumed he'd gone home. When i was on the platform i felt like I'd been punched. I just knew that I had to see him and literally ran to the pub. He was there, staring into a pint, and looked up as I walked in.

We'd not kissed / held hands or anything but it felt absolutely right for us to be together. He left his partner and we've been together ever since (she married the guy she'd been seeing within 8 months)

I know that if I'd got on my train things would have been very different.

In my 20's at a works do , the Dj played a slow song dedicated to 'the girl I've always loved '. I was too busy chatting to realise that girl was me and the chap that requested it wanted to dance with me. I only found out at a works reunion years later.

The chap is now CEO of a big company, my life could have been so different.

When I was eighteen I really wanted to join the police force. Unfortunately I listened to the advice of my grandmother and aunt and didn't go ahead with my plan. I've always regretted my lack of conviction and often wonder how different my life could have been if I'd followed my heart.

Deciding to play ball as now DH tried to chat me up in the middle of Murrayfield stadium. It was a split second decision whether to go along with it or not. The rest is history as that same man is now snoring next to me

I went to stay with a friend in Kentucky when I was in my 20's, I had a boyfriend at home who was lovely but the spark and sex life had long fizzled out but I didn't have the guts to split up.
My American friend introduced me to a guy there and there was an instant connection, we had a few kisses and he told me he'd love to make a go of it if I were single.

I came home and for 2 years still plodded on in the same unhappy relationship, the American guy contacted me a couple of times to see how I was.
Eventually I called it off and looked the USA guy up but he'd met and got engaged to someone else.

He's the only person I've ever felt genuine electricity from, I remember sitting on my friends porch one evening and he touched my back with a finger and it was like an electric shock.

I was invited to a party by someone I had only recently got to know. I didn't feel like going, but i went anyway. I met my DH there I often wonder what would have happened if I hadn't gone that night - I nearly didn't.

Walking away from my now dp soon to be dh in a club about 18 years ago. We had a fwb set up going on. Or a series of one night stands. Was talking to him for a couple of hours and went to the loo.

On the way back from the loo locked eyes with a disgustingly good looking lad. Went home with him instead. Thought I was madly in love for 2 years but he was an absolute cunt. He also introduced me to cocaine which is also an absolute cunt.

Fucked my job up spectacularly. Sold my house to avoid repossession and fucked off 100 miles away to sort myself out.

Ended up back at my mams 2 years later with a 4 month old baby, single, no job, not a thing to my name.

Turned it around and ran into my now dp outside a kebab shop 2 years later. We have been together 11 years and he has raised my dd as his own. We have a 4 year old ds and get married in May.

I wonder if I had not walked away that night
t what might have been.

I had one on a beach in Rome. I should have kissed the gorgeous man sitting beside me in the moonlight. I also could/should have kissed him when we’d met on the other side of the world when I was backpacking a few years before.

In Rome I didn’t do it because I had an on again off again bf at home, who turned out to be a complete twat!

I don’t know how different life might have been. He was breathtakingly beautiful, kind, funny, bright, adventurous and I was in awe he’d looked at me twice and stayed in touch with me.

I couldn’t love my DH more, he’s who I was meant to spend my life with. But part of me wishes I’d taken the leap all those years ago and could still have found DH to settle down with

The decision I made that changed my life forever and for the best: Agreeing to accompany a friend on a night out because she was going to go out drinking with a male friend who turned up with two other (male) friends. She was on her own and I didn't really want to go but I was worried about her being vulnerable on her own with three guys. I ended up with one of the friends. We dated, got engaged, married and have a nice home and children now.

When I was in my 20s I got put on a warning by my boss...I worked in a dreadful place in Covent Garden.

I was walking hom that day...not far to go but went past a certain theatre. I thought "Maybe I can get a new job in there..." and I walked in and asked. I hated my current boss so much and was very stressed.

That night the theatre rang offered me a job and I started work the next day and never went back to my old job.

A fella started work a few months later and that fella turned out to be DH!

If I'd not popped in on a whim, I wouldn't have met him!

I had cancer when I was 17/18 which left me permanently disabled. I always wonder what path my life would have taken had it not have happened but to be honest, I think it would have gone down the same route and I’m really proud I managed to not let everything that happened hold me back (cancer at 17/ disabled from surgery at 18/ pregnant at 19/ single mum on benefits at 20) and really turn it around in my favour

These are incredible to read, some unbelievable stories!

I don't think I have any other than I was hoping to go out with some friends on my course one night, but they weren't going so I went out with people from another course who invited me along. I didn't know them well but liked them enough!
We had drinks and had a great night, when just as we were about to say goodbye one of the men called me by a nickname he refers to me as to his course mates that I hadn't heard before. And I said why do you even talk about me to have a nickname for me? It turns out he'd fancied me since we met, and I'd felt the same.
If I hadn't asked that question and just gone on my way like I was about to, I would've avoided years of heartache.

So much happened in the months following that night and it still hurts me a lot to this day.

I was 20 and in a new relationship when I had my DD and I had booked to have a termination before a last minute change of heart.

It was the best decision I ever made and ten years later we have two children, he’s now my husband and we are beyond happy. Lots of pressure at the time to make a different decision and I still wonder what my life might have been. Love my life now though so the alternate version would have a way to go to beat my current existence.

Did VSO when younger. Was offered the opportunity to go to two places, didn't know which, so stuck a pin in a map and went to the nearest.

There I met DH and now have a son.

Whenever I see the pother place mentioned I remember how easily I could have gone there.

Reluctantly went to the same university as my then boyfriend (who was in his second year.)
We inevitably broke up but I made some amazing friends. And my degree led to a lucrative and interesting career.

One of those friends became my DH.
20 yrs plus and 4DCs later, I still don’t believe how lucky I am. He’s a wonderful human being.

That sounds so smug! life certainly hasn’t been a bed of roses. There have been some truly shit times but I shudder to think of never having met him.

Such a silly little thing. The decision to go for coffee with total strangers from a Mummy app. In the throws of PND, I almost didn't go. But I went. And now I have some incredible friends who I see daily and DD has toddler friends too.

When I left stbxh last year they all rallied round and made sure we were ok.

Going to the funeral of my Aunt who had just lost her fight to Cancer is definitely mine! My mother hated her and kept me away from her, I have contact with her children on social media and we're getting on well. At the cemetery waiting for the coffin to be lowered into the grave my cousin (daughter of Aunt who had just passed away) was hysterically crying and looking round for a familiar face and someone to comfort her, she looked me right in the eyes and didn't even recognize me so I couldn't even give her a cuddle or hold her hand :(. It broke my heart not being able to help her at a time like that. So I've gave her and her siblings my phone number so they can phone me at anytime. We're getting closer already and I'm so happy that I put myself out there and let my Aunt's death be a wake up call to not let my abusive mother have control of my life and stop me from having a relationship with my family xx

I wish I hadn't agreed to go out with my first boyfriend.

I wish I had agreed to go travelling with the guy who asked me to go to Australia with him. I hardly knew him but felt such a connection. Him asking me to go with him showed he felt the same way. He was gorgeous too!

@ProfessorPickles I remember your thread from that time, I'm really sorry to hear it didn't work out well. I hope you and your lovely little boy are doing ok

I left a high school aged 14. It was toxic and I was honestly suicidal. I moved to a new school, made friends who are still a huge part of my life 16 years later, and managed to salvage some of my mental health.

If I'd gone to church with DH1 instead of staying home with a headache, he would have been more careful about crossing the road and wouldn't have died.

I have a lovely DH2 and two great children but I do sometimes think about how different my life could have been.

Turning down the opportunity to work on an unnamed film after a dabble by chance in the industry. The film turned out to be a huge, huge film with a Hollywood a lister (since fallen from grace and gone back up again).

Turning on my laptop for no reason at exactly 4pm, when chilling out on my bed one afternoon on a work trip (meetings were over until the next day, I went back to my hotel).

I randomly joined a forum online after seeing a relevant thread that was just posted and met someone through it who I think will always be linked to my life now. He's a dick occasionally but he's one of my best friends.

I wish I'd gone for drinks with colleagues instead though sometimes. He's like the 2nd husband I never wanted - all the effort and aggro without the sex 😂

Happies love that quote

When my Exp put a comment underneath a photo of our son that he hadn’t seen in 3 years on my FB. I accepted the comment instead of declining it. STUPID STUPID STUPID! I could have just carried on my life exactly as it was, me and my son. Instead I let him back in, got pregnant, felt like I had to stick with it. Regretted it ever since. I wouldn’t have my amazing DS2 but my ex has caused him and DS1 unbelievable pain in a few short years. All my fault. I should never have trusted him again. Leopards don’t change their spots.