About Nursery Hours?

[Teawithtoast]

I'm going back to work soon. Part time, three days a week. I've found a really lovely nursery, but having read another thread, it's clear that long days at nursery are considered by quite a few to be unreasonable for babies. Given the hours I am expected to work, it is unreasonable to put an 11 month in nursery from 07.30 - 18.00 three days a week? If so, what else can I consider? (family providing childcare is not a option, neither is cutting back on my working days/hours sadly).

Mine have done full time since they were 9months. So that is 7.30 to 6pm 5 days a week, unless I can get one of the grandparents to pick up early. Early pick up for my kids is 3.30 ( end of school day if nanny can make it)
Other wise they are cared for feed played with. They love it and it won't be forever. I'm sure they would rather the fu days out and things we do in our spare time, than no money and staying home.

Do what's best for you.

I found a childminder who had no other children on my chosen work day, other than older children she picked up after school, so in the end I decided on nursery as I thought it would be best for her to interact with other babies. There are positives and negatives for both. Nurseries tend to have a bit more of structure I suppose, but you could find a very structured childminder or a more lax nursery I guess!

Mine did 8-4 four, sometimes five days a week from the same age. She loved it and thrived.

Dc2 will be doing the same when I finish maternity leave - the only thing I'll be doing differently this time around is I won't be feeling guilty about it this time, I worried and beat myself up so much leaving dd when a) I had no choice and b) she was absolutely fine (probably having more fun than had she been with me 24/7!)

Long nursery days are common as even if parents work strictly 9-5 they have to allow travel time from nursery to work and back again. And compressed hours is a popular option people use so they get a day at home even if the nursery days are longer.

DD went 8-6 3 days from 11 months, we did some early pick ups and late drop offs to start with when work allowed, then 7:30-6 4 days from 15 months. She absolutely loves it, no problems settling or anything (I was worried because she was mostly bf until then).

I think it's been fantastic for my little boy. He started 3 long days at 9 months and is so happy and confident at 18 months.

I never worry about dropping him off. He walks straight in and picks up some toys and he's fine. The nursery structures the day well and they get into the habit of knowing when it's snack time, lunch, soft play, etc. I'd struggle to keep him entertained without spending a fortune. Plus he's great with other children and new people.

It's fine, don't worry. Your baby will still get naps.
A childminder would be a more 'homely' environment but to be honest I didn't use one as they may have days of sickness and close for holidays. Whereas a nursery is open 51 weeks if the year. I didn't feel I could cover ad hoc closures and sickness from a childminder.

Mine does 8-6 3 days a week. She loves it now at 19 months but I must admit she was knackered the day after her 3 day stretch for a good 4 months after starting. She still sleeps longer on that day but I think would now cope quite well with 4 or 5 days if we had to work longer days.

DH and I have chatted about pick up and drop off times. The reason for the early start/late pick up is due to the length of my commute. My DH uses public transport to get to and from work, but even though he is much closer to home, the traffic is just appaulling. He takes public transport because of the bus lanes, which get him to/from work much quicker. We could get a second car, but he would have to do the same drop off time to get into work before 09.00. When he uses the car, he can be stuck in traffic for up to two hours for an eight mile journey! It's awful and it doesn't matter if he leave for work later. Sadly, his work are not very flexible.

My 14 month old only naps for about 30 minutes at nursery by the way but has always been a terrible sleeper.

Depends on your child- none of mine were exhausted by nursery. They’re going to be awake the same amount of time at home, after all.

Your child will only be there 3 days anyway

My 1 year old does 2 long days (7.30am - 6pm) at nursery a week. She's been fine and really enjoying it there.

Please ignore anyone that makes stupid comments.

From what I’ve heard the benefit of a childminder is that it’s a home from home environment... childminders will take your child on normal day to day errands, to toddler groups etc. They have the potential to be more flexible around routines etc. Some people prefer that environment, some don’t.

It also depends in the child a lot, a shy, anxious child may struggle, whereas my son would've been fine at that age.

He was ready for nursery at 2 really, just we couldn't really afford to pay for him.

The main thing is to find care that you are happy and confident with. No baby is born with an expectation of how many hours a day they should be spending in any particular place! But they will pick up how you feel about taking them to nursery, and whether you're positive or not.

The activities of the nursery will be well-organised to give your baby what s/he needs, including lots of love and care, activity and rest.

Okay, this is so personal - so if you like the nursery then I think it's fine, babies don't have a sense of time! If they are happy in the moment they are happy.

But - for me personally I wanted my babies to be in a home with a single carer who I would choose to entrust with their wellbeing, not a group setting like a nursery. So I chose a childminder. I preferred that myself as I felt it was a replica of a parenting relationship.

However honestly if I hadn't found the awesome childminder that I used I would have chosen a good nursery instead - go with your gut instinct when you look around but no I don't think those hours are aproblem.

I live in London and with commute there is just no way to work without leaving babies for 10 hour days - I think as long as the babies get to rest when they need to and aren't over stimulated, and get proper LOVING care (Not just someone doing their job - a baby needs an attachment figure to replce you) then they will be fine.

DS has been in nursery full time since he was 7 months old. From 0730-1830. It is necessary because we both work full rime., And I have a long commute.

He is now 18 months old and is really thriving. His nap at nursery is uually a couple of hours long. He might do a bit longer at home.

re. the benefit of a childminder - for me, I wanted a woman who would love my kids and treat them like family, they have a small group of children who also become like family. I loved it - my children really did gain another grandparent/ auntie type figure in my chilmnder and she truly knew them and cared about them as if they were here own.

If they were sick she took them anyway and just tucked them up on the sofa, if they were teething she carried them in her arms all day.

They were with her for 5 years - I didn't want anursery where staff changed and my baby/ toddler lost their 'attachment' figure / key person - I wanted a single relationship

But I think there are great nurseries out there and children will be fine there.

He’ll be fine, some children go 8-6pm 5 days a week from a few months old, they’re also fine. It’s hard to shake the guilt but he’ll probably have more fun there than at home!

I read the same thread and came away feeling crap about myself. DS is 2 and has been going to nursery 2 days a week 8-6pm since he was 9 months old.
I'm recently widowed and have returned to work just one day a week but wanted to keep things the same for DS plus really need a day a week to myself so DS still goes 2 days a week.
Read that thread and now feel like the world's worst mother.

My DS has done 8 till 5.30ish at nursery since he was 13 months (he's now 18 months) and has coped with it brilliantly.

I work Monday, Wednesday, Friday so he gets a day off at home in between which has worked quite well.

I did look at childminders but I was concerned about how I would cover the childminders holidays and any sickness they might have as well as my ds's inevitable sick days. Although grandparents can help a bit they are not local so it's not that easy.

If you're happy with the nursery you've found then I wouldn't worry OP, I'm sure your DS will be absolutely fine.

Very new to all this, but a childminder would care for more than one child, wouldn't they? So if the ratio of children to a childminder is the same as that of the ratio of children to a nursery worker, what is the benefit of a childminder over a nursery?

Some people prefer the more 'home from home' environment you get at a childminder. I think some also take the view that it's better for a baby to have one consistent carer.

My own view is that it's very dependent on the individual childminder/nursery: you can't say 'childminder is better' or 'nursery is better' because childminders, nurseries, and babies vary hugely. Decide what's right for your family based on the childcare options you have available.

FWIW, my DSs were in nursery 3 days a week (two days 7.30-6 and one 7.30-3.30) from ten months. They settled well, had wonderful key workers who showered them with affection and have thrived there. They coped fine with the long days too.

It's only 3 days a week. The other 4 your child will be at home all day. I think this way actually gives you more time with your child than, say, 5 days of 9 - 4.30. On work days the only time you have is getting ready in the morning, and when baby is tired in the evening. So you might as well condense your work into as few days as possible and enjoy your 4 days off.

Mine did 7:45 to 18:00 five days a week from 5.5 months. She loved it and still does.

NoArmaniNoPunani .

Don't feel bad, the stability is priceless for your DS and you need time for yourself.

There's only one couple I've ever judged for anything similar and that's because they did their absolute best to palm off the kids anywhere. Longest possible hours at nursery, minimal interaction at home and palmed off to GP and sleepovers at the weekend.

So long as you make a bit of effort to prioritise some time just focused on your kid(s) then it tends to work out just fine.