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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to expect people to clean up after themselves in cafe?

89 replies

Alloftheboys · 20/01/2018 20:01

Earlier went to Costa. Find a table for four which was covered in cutlery, plates and rubbish.
This one is usually messy as they never seem to have enough staff on.
I start to shift everything over to another table so we can sit and realise what a state the previous customers had left.

I assume it was one or two adults and a child by the mess - child sized pieces of sausage roll, dolly mixture sweets and loads of bits of chocolate all over the floor.
It looked like someone had been trying to feed seagulls!

I don't mind having a quick wipe and tidy over a table before we sit down but this was something else! I would never leave a table in a cafe/restaurant in that state.

So AIBU? (I know I'm ranting and in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter that much)

OP posts:
MyOtherNameIsAFordFiesta · 20/01/2018 20:05

I think it's polite to clear the worst of the mess, stack plates etc, but sometimes it's not possible to clean up properly without a cloth. And sometimes with kids in tow, you need to leave quickly. I've had times when we've just stayed 15 minutes too long, DS has had a meltdown, and it's been easier all round for us to just go.

ScreamingValenta · 20/01/2018 20:08

I generally tidy up out of habit, but wouldn't judge someone who didn't - isn't that part of what you pay for in a cafe, i.e. not having to clear up after yourselves?

MrsHathaway · 20/01/2018 20:11

A child who can make that much mess eating whilst mum necks a coffee isn't going to sit nicely while she carefully clears up.

Was the clean table smaller?

ShutUpBaz · 20/01/2018 20:12

YANBU. I wouldn't expect customers to make the table spotless but people that allow their children to chuck food all over the floor/table without even trying to minimise the mess or at least pick the bigger bits up are the bane of a servers life. It takes ages to clear up which means you can't turn the table as fast as you would like. They are not paid to scrap kids chewed up food off the floor.

Although, it makes you wonder what their houses are like......

Lockheart · 20/01/2018 20:15

As an ex-waitress and customer, YANBU. It’s highly inconsiderate.

It’s one thing to leave plates and glasses etc - that was part of my job. But to scatter sweets around and leave lumps of cake strewn all over the table (and the chairs, and carpet...) is outright bad manners.

TeachesOfPeaches · 20/01/2018 20:15

I think it's especially rude to litter a cafe with rubbish from food not bought from that store.

TheBlowersDaughter · 20/01/2018 20:16

YABU, you pay a premium to eat and drink in a cafe, which includes some one else clearing the table. Your complaint should be directed to the cafe for not having enough / efficient staff.

Original poster
Alloftheboys · 20/01/2018 20:22

There are napkins available and if it was a small child you assume the parent/carer would have had baby wipes with them.

We usually have an empty nappy bag on the table and put rubbish/used baby wipes in there so the staff can just chuck that in the bin, remove pots and wipe table with their cloth.

@MrsHathaway clean table was for two and there were loads of that size available.

I did notice that most of the rubbish wasn't what costa sell!

OP posts:
JanQuadrantVincent · 20/01/2018 20:24

YANBU. I always pick up the big bits my kids drop, and if it's particularly bad i ask for a dustpan and brush! I often get a surprised look and an insistence i don't need to from the staff when i ask for one though so I assume i'm in a minority Grin

44PumpLane · 20/01/2018 20:24

YANBU - leaving shit all over the floor is just bloody rude!
My 13 month old twins can be messy eaters and I've been known to get dustpan and brushes from cafes and do a quick tidy.
Also, given I'm out with the kids I tend to have baby wipes with me so I can use them to quickly wipe down a table and (if it's not carpet) wipe down the floor. If it's carpet I'll pick up all the bigger bits before we leave.

Perhaps it's different if you have children with additional needs who are likely to absolutely kick off as soon as they have finished eating, but in the majority of cases I think it's just rude!!

Original poster
Alloftheboys · 20/01/2018 20:26

@TheBlowersDaughter yes it is the staffs job to clean but these people left such a state that even if there were more staff working it would have taken so much longer to clean than a "normal" table.

I'm not going to claim that my kids haven't made an absolute state in places but I would have felt ashamed to leave any place how this table was left.

OP posts:
BoomBoomsCousin · 20/01/2018 20:27

I'm not sure why parents should clean up after children but all the other mess is OK?

If cafes etc. expect people to clear up they need to make it clear and provide equipment. If everyone else is just walking out leaving everything as it is then why would parents not do the same?

JanQuadrantVincent · 20/01/2018 20:28

Also i disagree with TheBlowersDaughter - that premium only extends to a general level of mess that most people would make. If you have a toddler lumping cake all over and you leave it behind you best make up for it with a decent tip for the extra work (ie time, manpower etc) that takes up.

Much like if you rent something- general wear and tear is accepted but you'd expect an additional charge for returning it dirty

Ski4130 · 20/01/2018 20:28

YANBU if people are out with kids of an age to make that type of mess, they’d generally have a wet wipe with them to clear up the worst of it. I worked as a waitress in my twenties and was always shocked by the state some people feel it’s ok to leave a table in. I cane to the conclusion that some people who eat out must be utter slobs if that’s how they eat, and the amount of mess they make. Grim.

DreamyMcDreamy · 20/01/2018 20:30

YANBU, takes seconds to take your plates over to the counter and pick up crumbs/litter from the floor.
I probably wouldn't wipe down the table as I'd assume the waiting staff would want to wipe it down properly, but I'd certainly clear the mess away!
Basic manners. Even my kids would.Afraid to say some there's some scruffy twats out there.

JanQuadrantVincent · 20/01/2018 20:30

Yes but Boom the state of a table when i have had a coffee with an adult friend is very different to that when a toddler has been involved!

But on that note - who leaves snotty tissues for staff to clean - i've seen that before. Grim

TheBlowersDaughter · 20/01/2018 20:31

YANBU - leaving shit all over the floor is just bloody rude!

OP made no mention of shit on the floor, only food.

Original poster
Alloftheboys · 20/01/2018 20:34

@BoomBoomsCousin I didn't say parents should clean but others shouldn't?

It was obvious the mess was child mess.

If I went out to a cafe and made mess and crumbs with a cake I'd sweep my hand over the table and put the crumbs on the plate.

I mentioned Costa as they have crockery and no customer bins rather than a fast food place where they have disposable packaging and lots of customer bins.

OP posts:
44PumpLane · 20/01/2018 20:37

TheBlowersDaughter oh I'm sorry you didn't understand I shall rephrase ...... YANBU... leaving general detritus and significant levels of food waste all over the floor is just bloody rude!!

Better?!? Or were you enjoying being a pedant?

Viviennemary · 20/01/2018 20:38

I don't think folk who have paid to sit in a café should have to clear tables. But neither do I think they should leave the kind of mess you describe. But the staff should have dealt with it. It sounds disgusting. Clutches pearls. I'd find somewhere else next time.

Spudlet · 20/01/2018 20:38

I got told off for clearing up too much the other day - the lovely cafe lady came over waving her finger at me and saying 'You're not at home now, have a break!'

I like it there Smile (I also used to work there so am extra-punctillious).

But I do agree that it's only polite to at least try and deal with the worst of the fallout, even if that's just stacking the bigger crumbs and lumps onto a plate. A certain amount of mess and crumbs etc are to be expected from most customers, but toddler ground zero tends to go beyond that, especially in the early days.

TheBlowersDaughter · 20/01/2018 20:38

@44PumpLane I love being a pedant Grin

Bellamuerte · 20/01/2018 20:43

That's what cafe staff are paid for. Most people (including me) will stack plates and put crumbs on them to make the job easier, but if tables aren't clean the staff are to blame.

LadyBunnysWig · 20/01/2018 20:45

If you've ordered food it usually comes on a tray anyways. Why not just stack the plates, cutlery and mugs on there? A quick swoop with a napkin over the floor and table and plonk that on the tray aswell. Done

JaneEyre70 · 20/01/2018 20:48

That very reason is why i never step foot inside a chain coffee shop. It beggars belief how people can leave a table but equally annoying that the shop doesn't employ enough staff to keep on top of it.