AIBU to expect people to clean up after themselves in cafe?

[Alloftheboys]

Earlier went to Costa. Find a table for four which was covered in cutlery, plates and rubbish.
This one is usually messy as they never seem to have enough staff on.
I start to shift everything over to another table so we can sit and realise what a state the previous customers had left.

I assume it was one or two adults and a child by the mess - child sized pieces of sausage roll, dolly mixture sweets and loads of bits of chocolate all over the floor.
It looked like someone had been trying to feed seagulls!

I don't mind having a quick wipe and tidy over a table before we sit down but this was something else! I would never leave a table in a cafe/restaurant in that state.

So AIBU? (I know I'm ranting and in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter that much)

@AnnieAnoniMouse yes I'm from the Midlands.

All you didn’t specifically say parents should clean up after children, no. But you emphasized the child mess which would be out of place in a post about everyone cleaning up after themselves whoever they were. And it’s very rare we hear people complaining that adults have left the table with the ring from the bottom of their cup of tea/glass of wine/pint of beer glaring up waiting for my elbow to lean into it.

I certainly don’t think it’s reasonable to make a mess on purpose or carelessly, but in a place where you’re spending 3 or 4 pounds on a single cup of coffee, I do expect the company to employ enough staff to sweep up, clear and wipe the tables and wash the dishes.

My friend is lovely, she does loads for the school, helps other parents out loads (having a houseful of kids on inset days etc), very kind to Family, friends, god awful inlaws etc...and I really like her, but I had to stop going out to cafes etc with the kids because they’re feral and she just leaves a mountain of mess and food waste. If I cleaned it up I felt like she’d think I was judging her and it just became uncomfortable. So I just made excuses, went to her or had picnics etc..now hers are at school we now add cafes in the mix, but NOT in the holidays! (And yes, her house is the same, but I don’t care, I shift the crap on the sofa and stack stuff on the worktop to find the kettle). Her house, her choice. I used to help her out loads around her house, but stopped, because she really doesn’t care about it and chooses to go out and do stuff rather than sort the house - I sort of admire her ability to ignore stuff that needs doing in favour of stuff she wants to do.

...but it’s too embarrassing in a cafe.

@Alloftheboys yes ignore the rest of my post.

This was the sarcasm.

@BoomBoomsCousin I supposed I made the point about child mess as there were manky bits of food all over the table and lots that had been dropped or thrown on the floor.
In general adults don't throw food about.

I believe everyone should have a little tidy and at least attempt to clean a spill or alert a staff member so it can be cleaned up for safety.

This Costa is generally not good for tidiness/cleanliness of tables and floor and I think they are trying to save on having another member of staff on over a busy weekend lunchtimes.

@TheBlowersDaughter so you want me to acknowledge the bit about people have other stuff going on, distracted etc?

Yeah maybe.

Perhaps you should save your vitriol for a more important issue. I feel you are wasted commenting on my silly thread.

There's no place to clear dishes to in the Costas around here.

And they're usually out of napkins, too.

Makes it tricky for those with messy little ones, I imagine.

YABU moving the plates and cups to another table. Just shifting it for next customer. I hate seeing people do that. Someone even done it as I was about to sit down at a table. Take it up to the counter, or somewhere more convenient.

@starzig

I had 2 DCS and a trolley full of food.
OH had gone up to the counter to join the long queue.
There were plenty of small tables empty so I put the tray and crockery on one of those.
No staff member nearby other than ones behind the counter which was far away.
I mentioned it was Costa as they have no customer bins or tray stations for dirty cups.

What should I have done?

Wait for DP and take it yo the counter. Transferring the problem doesn't solve it.

Pots = pottery = potteries. The place where it all used to be made before most manufacture was sent overseas.

Pretty standard term here in staffs.

@AnnieAnoniMouse arrggh reading about your friend was making me cringe.
I'd have to have a little tidy up in a cafe with her.
I'm not a clean freak or anything like that. My problem is household clutter

Does your friends household situation not impact on her and the kids - e.g can't find stuff, losing things.

I think tidying up after yourself in a cafe was something always drilled into me as a kid so I do it without thinking now.

@starzig so sit the 2 kids in the filth and melted chocolate?

DS2 would probably have tried to dive into the leftovers.

Goodness - never realised clearing up could cause such melodrama. Maybe just not complain about others with kids being messy when you also struggle.

I can;t see the problem in shifting it to another table, it's unhygienic to put a used tray of stuff on the counter where they are preparing fresh drinks, and there's no room anyway.

I have always tidied up after myself in a cafe and made sure I left stuff on the table in a way that's easy for staff to clear it.

You have had some odd replies on this thread OP, including some intentional misunderstanding I think.

I personally clear the table as best i can and would pick up any food from the floor if it was easy to do so. It's decent manners i think and it takes seconds. I don't clean to a standard it is ready for use by the next customer but i make some effort. I don't like it when others don't. To me it says a lot about a person if they leave a right state.

I feel the same about those people who pile high mountains of food at buffets or all inclusive or even just breakfast in a hotel then waste loads by leaving most or not even touching some of the stuff they do take. Pure greed.

@starzig ha ha melodrama?
I was just having a bit of a moan about a situation. Haven't exaggerated anything to make it more interesting.
Yep my kids can be messy but I try to clean up after them. I'm not "struggling".
I cleaned up as best as I could but the floor needed a proper sweep and wipe/mop.

I find it really demoralising how many people don't bother to clean after themselves in places like Pret. Never go in Costa so not sure how the set up works, but when there are bins like there are in Pret, how lazy and entitled do you need to be to not bother to tidy up as you leave? Says an awful lot about a person.

Alltheboys. A ‘little tidy up’ really wouldn’t have made a dent, it was dreadful and she let them run around with cake, ice cream etc which they’d smear & drip on everything & other people. It was just wayyy too embarrassing.

Yes, they’re always looking for something ‘lost’ and replacing things. But the kids are as happy as pigs in shit because she’s always up for doing stuff, doesn’t care about playdoh ground into the carpet & never ‘nags’ (she thinks she’s letting them ‘be kids’ because ALL of their toys are always tipped out everywhere while the crates sit empty). She doesn’t say ‘No’ to anything, ever.

I love her, but she does my head in where the kids are concerned!

Agree people should clear up after their DC but what is it with places like Costa and Starbucks that they seldom clear tables? On many occasions when I’ve been to Starbucks Drive-Through in Cardiff it’s been nearly empty, no queue, lots of staff, and tables full of crockery and crumbs.

Always th and clear up a little, put all my cups / plates onto the tray etc. If I’m in an independent cafe I may even go up to the bar and hand it over to them (if no queue)

I wouldn’t be cleaning the floor though, that seems excessive when they have those brush/scoop things on sticks

YANBU i have 2 young DC and have always cleared up before we leave a cafe. It doesn’t take a minute to pile cutlery and pick up the big bits of food. I am v judgey of people that leave it in a mess!

@Starzig I think the OP is only interested in posters who agree with her. This is AIBU after all.

Slightly off topic but it pisses me off when I see people throw their rubbish on the floor at cinemas. Not just children but adults too. Just take it out with you and put it in the bin outside the door, it's really not that hard.

@Sparklingbrook yes. Tiny counter. Enough space for customer to speak to server and that's it. If you're just waiting for a drink you have to hover nearby and lean back into the queue to grab it.
This is the first time I've started a thread and I'm pleased it was on one of the burning issues of the day

@AnnieAnoniMouse does the losing things not stress her out or is she so laid back she's horizontal? I'll admit to clutter and procrastinate about things and it's hard for me to be organised but I really couldn't live like she does.