To ask you to keep me company?

[NomsQualityStreets]

Whilst I survive the week on my own with a 7 week old and toddler whilst DP is away for work?

I probably sound like a wimp but it's the first time he has been away for that long since we've been together (6years). I don't have any plans apart from seeing my DM on Tuesday which feels like a lifetime away.
Last night was night 2 on my own I'm co sleeping with the baby so no downtime really and for some reason DS1 (2.5yrs) woke up thrashing and crying/whining and wanting a long cuddle. He woke up again at about 3am and was crying and I have no clue why, he's usually a brilliant sleeper and goes 7pm-6am with no wakings . Now I'm effectively on alert all night.

I've no money until payday to afford any days out or playcentres etc
I've stocked up on quick foods in case I have a bad day and no time to cook.

I'm currently putting DS2 down for a nap, DS1 is rolling on the rug watching Octonauts and I really hope I can have 5 to whip up some food.

I always hate when my OH goes away for work. Last time he did, it was just me & 2 year old but now I have an 11 week old too.

He has been out for the night twice and we coped just fine and in a way, it seemed easier to establish a routine on our own steam.

Try not to do too much, lazy days are fine but definitely try and get out of the weather allows! And cleaning can wait, but try and keep the kitchen clear. Last thing you need is to have 5 minutes to eat and you don’t have any clean cutlery etc!

Thanks @DollyLlama I'm trying to keep on top of most stuff cleaning wise as we have a small house so any clutter just makes it worse.

Decided to brave the snow and venture out for a little walk . Wrapping DS1 up warm and baby is going in the sling.

I know no one really reads much of this but I'll keep the thread going to keep myself sane occupy myself for the rest of the week.

Ended up nipping in to see a friend on our walk which was useful as it turned from snow into icy rain.
Had a coffee and DS1 played with her DD.
Had to head back home before it got dark so ended up having to walk back in the rain and slushy snow

Gave in and we had fish fingers for dinner, DS1 had his bath and some calpol as seems to be getting a bit of a cold, he's now tucked in bed.
I'm also trying to get the baby to sleep as I want to whizz around the kitchen to get it a bit tidier. I'm dying for a glass of ice cold Coke but luckily we have none in

Sounds like a good day! Nice and full.

Hope you have another good night x

I'm reading. Glad you had good day.

My dh will be away this year and I'm dreading it so reading with interest. In a different position though with with teenagers xx

@gttia I don't have much experience with teenagers but I hope it will be easier with 2 older ones rather than 2 younger

I would have felt a lot better/more confident if mine were both a bit older, sleeping through and I knew I had a set bedtime routine and that was that.

ATM it's me wrestling baby whilst giving DS1 a bath, not being able to give DS1 one on one time before bed, baby screaming whilst I dress his brother and rocking the baby whilst tucking DS1 in bed - I miss DP helping with bedtime especially as we can make sure DS1 gets some nice quality time with one of us and we can take time reading him books etc whilst the other occupies baby.
And it doesn't help being on my toes with the baby I.e. Not knowing when he will fall asleep/wake up and what sort of night we will have.

I've been thinking wether I should be getting him into a routine too but I don't really know what I'm doing with that ...

The routine will come but you don't need to put yourself under pressure to do it whilst DH away x

Mine sort themselves out, so it's more him and our evenings I will miss . Your doing incredibly well.I was a single mum with two little ones for six years and sometimes things were hard,I just rolled with it day by day! Goodness knows how lol.

I suppose so @Tistheseason17 I'm just not sure how. We let DS1 co-sleep with us until he was 6months old and it was a nightmare getting him into his own crib and had nights where he would wake every 30mins once we started trying and I'm scared we will end up with Ds2 doing the same.

I'm currently watching the end of LOTR whilst Ds2 is sleeping in the lounge with me (not sure how long that will last) and I've given in and made myself some duck spring rolls I had in the freezer which I'm currently devouring like they're chips

I used to bath them together. I'd take all the clothes for the baby into the bathroom and dry and dress them while the older one bathed, then get the older one out and put the baby in his chair.

Once settled, I'd read the older one a story, get them off then feed and get the baby to bed.

I had to do four at once for quite a while, hard work but you just have to go with whatever's easiest for you and them.

My second co slept with me as I was frankly too exhausted to move her!
I found that once she'd starting weaning things became easier. She was a hungry baby and I did not produce enough milk and she refused the bottle.. argh!
So we weaned at 17 weeks and then settling for the night became way easier.

We did do controlled crying albeit at much shorter intervals as it broke my heart. Please don't judge. However, it was the best thing we did at 6 mths (not before as they're too ickle).

We had a routine of dinner, bath (lavender) and story, bottle and bed with lullaby music playing. The smells and music reinforced that bedtime was coming. It did not always go to plan and when they get a cough or cold you do go backwards. But do stick to it as they remember that safe familiarity of routine.
I really fancy chips now!

We did controlled crying with DS1, he was 11mo and never slept for longer than 2hrs at a time at night and I was exhausted. But I think it's our own fault as we never incorporated any sort of routine until he was about 7-8months.
I also ended up doing the gradual withdrawal method where I'd sit on the floor next to his cot holding his hand/finger/foot (random limb of his choice ) and gradually letting go and slowly bum shuffling out of the room when his eyes were closed and doing a ninja freeze everytime they popped open, it's funny now but it was so tiring at the time.

It did work though as within a week or so he was sleeping 7-7 sometimes even as late as 8.30/9 am wake up.

But I would much rather avoid doing it with DS2 and just get him into a good routine that works early on.

It's rough isn't it!?!
But, you will find a way

It is, I knew having 2 would be different but I forgot about how hard the actual baby stage is.

DS1 has gotten to a lovely age where he's communicating better and better and learning things and can play independently so I could get on with things if I needed to, I completely forgot how tied down you can be with a tiny baby and now I'm getting a reality check.

DS2 is just stirring. He's had a good nap TBH, fingers crossed that's him just waking for feeds for the night. I'm wondering if I could manage to feed him and put him back down and sneak off for a quick, desperately needed shower

I used to pop DD2 in a bouncer outside the shower door and she still wailed the entire time!

I will say that as they get older you long for the days when all they wanted was you and not Barbie! DD aged 4 creeps into bed with me a few times a week and I secretly love it x

I will probably miss it one day.

I'm currently stuck in bed under a clingy baby who insists to sleep on my chest only!
It's ok though because I like the smell of his head and watching his squishy face.

But not so great for when I'm actually wanting to fall asleep!

Today's update, went to see my DP(arents).
And DS1has come down with a cold which probably explains his night wakings
Poor mite has a stuffed up nose, red checks and glossy eyes. He's barely eaten today just drinking liquids and wanting cuddles.
He keeps asking for his daddy.

I think it's going to be a long night...

Can I join in? My DH is away for 2 weeks, in a place where we can't really keep in touch It's tough and lonely at nights but the time is passing as I'm so busy. You sound like you're doing a fab job OP, mine are older now but I do remember him being away when they were little

I remember when my husband was away for 2 months with no contact at all until the day he was coming home! It was horrible

Gosh it must be horrible when you can't even get in touch with your OH

I've spoken with DP before DS1 bedtime because he kept asking for daddy, it was a bit of a back and forth with the phone because he kept talking to DP then passing the phone back to me and then wanting it back . I heard DP exhale loudly as he hung up and can't quite figure out if he's just tired or if he was glad that was over

DS1 is tucked in now, had calpol and I put some Vicks on him too. I really hope he sleeps well.

I've picked up a few snacks I'm planning to break into once the baby falls asleep.

Hope you all manage to get a good nights sleep. Bet DH misses you all, does he find it hard too when he has to be away?

Enjoy your snacks, I’ve just finished a tub of popcorn off. Oops.

This is a lovely thread and nice to keep going for those who are flying solo.

OP hope DS1 feels better soon. I remember those smelling head times, aaah

I totally understand OP. My husband is away a fair bit and I have little ones. I always feel anxious when he's away, even though I am well able to cope, as are you. I find the nights tough and lie awake on alert a lot of the time!

I do find the time goes faster as you go through the days. Just think, you now only need to get to the day after tomorrow!

The baby has decided it's party time even though for the past few night he's been pretty much just waking for feeds from about 8ish.
I've gone through all the nursery rhymes I know but he's still wide awake and eyeing me up with distaste.

@MumJ21 he says he doesn't like being away from us, and it's the first time he's been away for so long. I'm kind of jealous he gets more than 2 hours uninterrupted sleep
But he's also busy so has to often keep contact short so I don't think he gets to give it much thought.

Hopefully baby will settle soon. My LO used to do the same thing, I just used to lay her on her playmat and let her tire herself out. I would love some uninterrupted sleep, even when my hubby is home he doesn’t do any night feeds or get up in the morning. It’s all mummy!