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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Situation at work....AIBU?

195 replies

se7enthings · 19/01/2018 10:10

Hello!
I work in a pub 10 hours a week whilst at university, the pay is crap but the hours fit in.

I am the youngest behind the bar age 23 and I feel as though I’m getting mugged off. I work with a 60 year old lady who knows everyone and constantly looks for conspiracy in the workplace, aka, someone’s stealing etc.

I am the only person out of both of us to clear up the glasses and lifting a heavy crate 70+ times a night has started taking its toll and I am suffering with what feels like an injury to my spine. I have asked several times for my colleague to help me and she does it once or twice then stops. She’ll stand next to me talking about how someone pissed her off and watch me clean up everyone’s glasses. She tells me to “hurry up as she wants to leave at 12:30” but stands talking to customers whilst I clean the bar, she moans she has a bad back and is under impression she does everything. Landlady not much use as only cares about profit not staff wellbeing.

Anyway, I don’t get sick pay, at all, and I’ve checked the rota and I won’t be able to take one of my holidays as others are off. I can’t cope with the pain, I’ve missed a day of uni and I’ve been up all night with it, AIBU to get a sick note for 2 weeks?

OP posts:
timeisnotaline · 20/01/2018 19:09

The older lady is not the boss, has been there less time so does not ‘know all the customers’ and keeps all the tips. Quite probably a 60 year old woman shouldn't be lifting the trays but that means it’s not the job for her or more staff, not that the op just has to cover for her.At this point the ops only options are those which involve taking a week off and stopping lifting for at least a couple of weeks to prevent long term back injury. This is quitting or taking a week off and bringing a Gp note about permitted activities and seeeing what the owner does. But op you should be taking lots of notes for how to address things like this in the future - eg who told you to ‘fill the fuckers up’? The answer is you carry them then, half full is how I’m carrying them.

TemptressofWaikiki · 20/01/2018 19:42

Good luck OP. Sorry you have it deal with such crap at work and some totally shitty posts on here.

Graphista · 20/01/2018 23:30

Clara respect is EARNED not OWED - age is not a get out of being a cheeky fucker card! I'd lay odds this other employee has ALWAYS been a lazy arse employee! I've had loads of different jobs and this type of "employee" pops up in every industry in my experience. Unless they're called out they keep getting away with it. I hope in this case the shitty boss has to do some shifts with her and realises how useless she is!

Gemini69 · 20/01/2018 23:45

Somebody is taking the PISS ... and it's definitely not you OP Flowers I hope you resigned and find another job soon... Smile

the Bar owners will be amazed at slow the night time clean up takes now you're gone.... Hmm

claralaraloo · 21/01/2018 14:30

Clara respect is EARNED not OWED - age is not a get out of being a cheeky fucker card!

Yeah and its been earned in the 40 years since she was OP's age. Woman doesnt have to earn OP's respect, she's a child,

ilovesooty · 21/01/2018 14:33

I'd like to think my younger colleagues respect my ability and work ethic not my age - as I respect theirs. Anyone who describes a younger employee as a child isn't deserving of respect.

Gemini69 · 21/01/2018 14:35

Anyone who describes a younger employee as a child isn't deserving of respect

Agreed Flowers

claralaraloo · 21/01/2018 14:40

Any child that thinks women her grannys age should be lugging as many crates as she is is definitely not worthy of any respect

ilovesooty · 21/01/2018 14:55

I expect to do the same work as my younger colleagues in the same role.

I'm glad I work in a mutually respectful workplace which doesn't include colleagues like you clara

It's due to people with your attitude that we have posters on here who talk of entitled older people and casual ageism is so common.

Original poster
se7enthings · 21/01/2018 15:08

claralaraloo, I am 23. I’m not a child, I will respect anyone until they give me reason not to, your attitude is disgusting. So...from a child’s mouth, kindly fuck off because you’re doing my head in.

I rang another pub this morning, they want waitressing staff so I’m having a trial shift tomorrow. Yay

OP posts:
Gemini69 · 21/01/2018 16:15

Wonderful news lovely.. you're doing the right thing... Grin

OOoh and ignore the provocation ....as you're likely already aware.. these types are everywhere in life Flowers

aaaaargghhhhelpme · 21/01/2018 16:18

Brilliant news op! Hope it goes well Flowers

I have the utmost respect for you (and I'm waaaaay older than you!) I'm sure you'll do a grand job

Els1e · 21/01/2018 16:34

Great news. Really hope it goes well for you and it is somewhere where all staff are treated with equal respect. And just for the record, I’m nearly 60 and work with people in their early 20’s and we all do exactly the same job. I wouldn’t want it any different.

FucksakeCuntingFuckingTwats · 21/01/2018 16:47

Clara if you are nearly 60 then its about time you grew the fuck up as you are going on like a child, not the op.

Tink2007 · 21/01/2018 16:48

FFS. I’m sorry but all the people saying she is 60 and shouldn’t be expected to lift - if that’s the case then she isn’t fit for the job if her and the OP have the same job with the same job description.

My mum is 55 and works in a cash and carry and has to lift plenty of heavy stuff and is only five years younger than the OPs work colleague.

ilovesooty · 21/01/2018 17:04

Els1e glad I'm not alone!

Great news about the new job OP.

hellsbellsmelons · 21/01/2018 18:08

Well done.
I hope it goes well.

Viviennemary · 21/01/2018 18:16

Well done you for getting another job. This woman was totally out of order. If she can't lift then she's not up to the job. End of. Hope all goes well in new job.

Graphista · 21/01/2018 19:23

"Yeah and its been earned in the 40 years since she was OP's age. Woman doesnt have to earn OP's respect, she's a child"

She hasn't been earning the op's respect, and the op is NOT a child she's a WOMAN of 23 who is entitled to her rights re health and safety and respect for doing the work the 60 year old is too damn lazy to!

Op well done and good luck with the new job.

goose1964 · 21/01/2018 19:35

If she's there longer it's possible she hurt her back doing the lifting too.. Report your employer to HSE as you should have manual handling training so you don't hurt your back

tillytown · 21/01/2018 22:58

Why is ageism allowed on this thread, but swiftly deleted on others?

KeepCalm · 21/01/2018 23:29

Can you work for the university instead? In the union or the library? They're usually great employers

Original poster
se7enthings · 22/01/2018 00:46

I commute to and from uni and it’s around an hour a day so not a good idea

OP posts:
Original poster
se7enthings · 22/01/2018 00:46

tillytown - because it is reversed, things only exist when it is the young being ageist

OP posts:
WeirdAndPissedOff · 22/01/2018 01:33

How do you know this woman has earned anyone's respect? She has lived for 60+ years, but why does that entitle her to more respect from the OP than she has to give in return? Someone may be in their 60s and have coasted through life, been lazy and entitled, and not earn anything. Or they may not.

To some extent I think there should be some give and take regarding different abilities in the workplace - I wouldn't expect a colleague who was physically unable to lift to do a lot of lifting, however I would expect that employee to recognise that the other is taking on their share of the workload and to compensate accordingly. I also believe that if those duties are an intrinsic part of the role, then the employee is not fit for that role.

If someone in their 60s applied for a job and was turned down because the role involved a lot of heavy lifting - despite the applicant giving no indication of there being an issue with manual work - that would be age discrimination, of course? So why is it different if an employee takes on the role then expects another employee to do all the difficult work purely due to their age?

There seems to be age discrimination towards OP on this thread, too - a lot of posters are assuming the useless employee must be senior, better liked by the customers, doing the serving which it is implied she must be able to do better then OP - why? Because of OPs age? Because I can't see any other implication of any of this in OP's posts.

To OP - you are doing the right thing by leaving. Good luck! Flowers