My best friend and I have been friends for almost thirty years but now live some distance away, but our friendship has stayed as close as it ever was. I respect her hugely and would never want to hurt her, which is why I haven't spoken to her directly just yet.
I am godparent to both her ds and all of our dc are close. Over the years I have noticed her youngest ds has quite extreme behaviour issues, these have become increasingly pronounced.
At 10 yrs old it is quite obvious to anyone that something is wrong. He finds it difficult to talk or engage with the others (he can speak but chooses not to) he does strange fits of dancing in restaurants or lies on the floor. He rocks a lot and comforts himself with his thumb. He hangs off the other children or constantly prods them but doesn't actually speak or join in. My friend did once tell me something about an assessment but didn't elaborate and the moment was lost.
I really don't know what could be wrong with him, I am definitely not an expert but I know something is, and she hasn't told me. I don't know how to ask her if everything is okay as surely she must need some support?
Or maybe she prefers not to acknowledge it. She struggles terribly with him when we go out together, and it is beginning to feel like the elephant in the room, as I don't know what to say.
I don't care how her ds behaves, it doesn't bother me in the least, I love him to bits. I just want to be there for her, if there is indeed something wrong it must be hard for her to deal with.
Anyone with advice would be greatly appreciated.