To not understand why people call their baby...

[smellfunny]

Not to be goady, but I don't understand why people give their babies names with negative connotations or meanings. Examples from the top of my head being:

Cain (murdered his brother in Old Testament)
Hector (hector also being a synonym for bullying someone)
Tristan (this one is a bit contentious because it can either mean 'tumult' or correspond to 'sadness')

Is it just that people don't think about the meanings behind the names? Feel free to add more names to the list...

Bonus name: 'Claudia' coming from the Latin word for 'lame'. I gave this one a pass because it's so established and the connotation is generally unknown...

“Is it not possible that people might know the origin or meaning of names but choose them anyway, 'well educated' or not?”

Possible. But then, particularly in the case of a name like Ophelia, which really only has one association, I would think they were either “tone deaf” or trying really hard to be cool, at the expense of their child.

Cain was on my shortlist. Had to be spelt with a c, oh thought k was to aggressive. Also has Kanen on our list. My best friend is called ophelia. I still like those names and don't regard any negative connotations

Bertrand, or perhaps they like the name and don't give a flying fuck for the opinions of people who like to congratulate themselves on their knowledge of Shakespeare while looking down on those they assume not to be well educated.

I don't have kids but I would consider Ophelia if I were having a girl. I think it's a beautiful name. I have an English degree (yes, I've studied Shakespeare!) and I do not consider myself either tone deaf or trying really hard to be cool .

'at the expense of their child.' I don't think her name is doing Ophelia Lovibond much harm, to give one example out of the air.

Was interested so just checked the population register for my country (Finland) and there have been 52 children named Adolf since 2010. The mind boggles. Wonder what other names to check now.

I know an Ophelia. It's a pretty name. I don't associate her with Shakespeare's Ophelia.

Several people have told me they named their DD after a favourite book. Rebecca. That struck me as being a bit odd.

I think life can be hard enough- knowingly giving your child a name which has the potential to make it the tiniest bit harder is a dick move. IMHO.

I can see that the name Adolf could mare a child's life harder, but how can calling a child Ophelia make her life even a tiny bit harder?

I'm baffled why people i know were named "Peter" and "Andrew", when their surname was Ness. Made for giggles in registration every morning at school - "A. Ness?" Here, Sir! "P. Ness?" Here, Sir!

I wouldn't make any associations with Shakespearean names because they all have enough other uses outside of, before, and after, Shakespeare's use of them. Kate, Bianca, Isabel, Rosalind, Ophelia, Olivia, Juliet... maybe not Tamora, or Desdemona, but I definitely wouldn't think that the parents of an Ophelia should have considered Shakespeare's character's end.

Cain, maybe not because the OT one is the only Cain I can think of. But to assume only one possible cultural connection is, with the majority of names, making a lot of assumptions of the kind that I'd generally seek to avoid in life.

I don't see how that name would make life any harder for someone tho. I would never anticipate people to treat them badly because a character with the same name committed suicide. I would never think that the name would 'tempt fate' and make them kill themselves. I fact I think a name with an interesting literary context would enrich someones life. It certainly has mine. It's started conversations in fairly dry circumstances, so for that i'm always grateful.

“Cain, maybe not because the OT one is the only Cain I can think of. But to assume only one possible cultural connection is, with the majority of names, making a lot of assumptions of the kind that I'd generally seek to avoid in life.”

I’d put Ophelia with Cain and Desdemona- obviously Kate and Juliet et al are “diluted” by usage.

I just think that if you’re “doing” Hamlet at school it wouldn’t be much fun being called Ophelia..........And there will always be people who think it’s clever to make smart arsed remarks.

It's where you draw the line then I suppose.... there's a Fay Weldon story about a woman whose mother named her Threnody which she considers a curse through life until someone tells her that from now on it means just her, not a lament or dirge, which I'm reminded of here.

I mean, I fucking hate my name, really loathe it - but it's the most top-100-in-birth-year name I could have. There are no instances I can think of in literature or religion. None of me have been dictators or murderers. It's not a made-up name, or spelt in an unusual way. But I hate it, and I hate occasions on which I have to give it in full. I'd take Ophelia any day, which goes to show that you never can tell.....

I'm baffled why people i know were named "Peter" and "Andrew", when their surname was Ness.

I'm baffled too. Try to be original next time eh?

Yeah, but if you were doing Of Mice and Men, it wouldn't be much fun to be called Lennie. Or if you were doing The Handmaid's Tale, Serena. Or, to take a really really common name, Isabel if you were doing Measure for Measure.....

My hunch is that a popular Ophelia would not have any more trouble with Hamlet than with anything else in her school life, and an already unpopular one, I don't know, maybe people would say go drown yourself in a river lol. I don't think it's a connection that has potential to alter a child's life if it came up.

My point ^ is not that it's okay to say that to an Ophelia, and the lol was meant to be part of an imagined quotation. What I mean is, a child who suffers in that context is probably one who's already having a hard time in other ways which would already be causing concern, and I doubt that the play would trigger anyone's descent in popularity.

I just think that if you’re “doing” Hamlet at school it wouldn’t be much fun being called Ophelia..........And there will always be people who think it’s clever to make smart arsed remarks. Kids will bully and tease their peers for WHATEVER they can find: names, yes, whatever they are (I got teased for mine and it's not Shakespearean or tragic); appearance; clothes; the way they talk... You cannot legislate for other children not to find something to give peers a hard time about, however many knots you tie yourself in.

I think life can be hard enough- knowingly giving your child a name which has the potential to make it the tiniest bit harder is a dick move. Oh, get over yourself.

Exactly, people will make stupid remarks about anything. So what shall we do? Make ourselves small and invisible hoping to pass under the radar and that we never draw attention to ourselves?

We watched the Ceebeebies Midsummer Nights Dream the other day and DS1 was thrilled there was someone with his name in it. I fully expect it to make no difference to him if he does it in school.

We did Jane Eyre t school, no one teased the girls called Jane. I suspect it's how you deal with it too. I never got teased because i was never bothered. In sea of Gemmas and Emmas i was glad to have my name.

I don't think it's a connection that has potential to alter a child's life if it came up”

No, neither do I. But even if it has the potential to make her a bit unhappy, then why do it? Obviously you can’t know what might be picked up on, but surely avoid the obvious if you can? That’s why I don’t like the “If you love it, use it” line when people post doubts about names. It’s not the poster who has to live with it- it’s somebody who’s not even born yet!

surely avoid the obvious if you can?

Name connotations are not necessarily obvious to everyone; why cut off your nose to spite your face by assuming that everyone will a) recognise where the name comes from and b) bully the child about it?

And, I'll say it again: if a child is going to get teased or bullied, unfortunately children will always find something. Even a name that seems innocuous to parents can be used against a bullied child. I know from my own miserable childhood experience and that of several others I knew.

I think teaching our children not to look down on others and make smart arsed remarks would be a much more effective way of making other people's lives better.

Judging a parent's level of education based on what they called their children is a dick move and not the sort of behaviour I would model for my DC.

I really like word “mirage”. In an ideal world I would call my child as Mirage but the definition of the word mirage is something that is believed to be true or real but that is actually false or unreal.

Well said, Dione.

I have a Tristan and was well aware of its meaning. It's a beautiful name for my very loved child.
Sadness/tumult enter every life at some point. It's ok to feel sad sometimes.