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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not understand why people call their baby...

570 replies

smellfunny · 15/01/2018 08:20

Not to be goady, but I don't understand why people give their babies names with negative connotations or meanings. Examples from the top of my head being:

Cain (murdered his brother in Old Testament)
Hector (hector also being a synonym for bullying someone)
Tristan (this one is a bit contentious because it can either mean 'tumult' or correspond to 'sadness')

Is it just that people don't think about the meanings behind the names? Feel free to add more names to the list...

Bonus name: 'Claudia' coming from the Latin word for 'lame'. I gave this one a pass because it's so established and the connotation is generally unknown...

OP posts:

ClaryFray · 16/01/2018 21:22

Those are mostly biblical. The bible is a work of fiction to me, so the connotations are nothing.

Biblio78 · 16/01/2018 21:30

I think some names like hector come from the languages that have enriched English over time? So probably have different meanings that aren't negative?
Also most people just choose a name that they like the sound of? ( I did tbh)
My great great grandfather was called Nero lol

kungpopanda · 16/01/2018 21:32

Met a little girl called Helvetica, yoyotogogo?

Well, PG Wodehouse did say that there is some raw work pulled at the font....

MamaBishop89 · 16/01/2018 22:43

No offence but I really do think your reading into things too much. Some people name their children for the meaning behind the name, others the name is passed down through the family and others just choose the name bet they like how it sounds or just because they like it.

A name is just a name. It does not mean the child will become anything in particular, life and genetics determine that.

Geordie1944 · 16/01/2018 22:59

AIBU to think that the OP has not got enough to do? For Christ's sake.

sweetkitty · 16/01/2018 23:16

I've got a DD whose name means ahouse of sorrow or House of singing andca son who's name means One who takes the place of another

Finklestein1984 · 17/01/2018 08:39

I think most people who get hung up on names because of certain connotations are just being pretentious and trying to show off.

There is the odd name here and there that you probably wouldn’t use - Adolf might be the only real one I can think of right now.

But people who criticise names due to some historical/literary/biblical/obscure medical reference are just being pretentious and obnoxious. ‘You do know Shakespeare/The Iliad/Aristotle/The Bible?!’ It’s just showing off how well read you are. Yes some people will know the cultural reference and will have named their child because of it - it’s rude to judge. And no, some people won’t know in which case, why would it matter to them.

Megs4x3 · 17/01/2018 10:36

It's a good job we all don't think alike. I love knowing about the source and etymology of names, why people chose them for their children and why they like some and not others. I think it's fascinating and far from pretentious if others research and put thought into their choices. Each to their own.

Megs4x3 · 17/01/2018 10:38

Posted too soon - you say it's rude to judge @Finklestein1984 but your first statement was a judgement.

Battleax · 17/01/2018 11:06

I think it shows how detached we are becoming from our own cultural inheritance that you consider some of those things "obscure" TBH.

Clandestino · 17/01/2018 11:12

OP, can I swap my life with you? Clearly you must be getting bored out of your mind to write an AIBU like this.

sirfredfredgeorge · 17/01/2018 11:28

I think it shows how detached we are becoming from our own cultural inheritance

Just because the Iliad is your cultural inheritance, doesn't mean it's anyone elses, or indeed it ever has been. The assumption that a change in what books or legends people have does not mean you're detached from cultural inheritance.

Battleax · 17/01/2018 11:37

Just because the Iliad is your cultural inheritance, doesn't mean it's anyone elses, or indeed it ever has been.

You think The Iliad is my personal cultural inheritance and nobody else's?

derangedmermaid · 17/01/2018 11:43

Meh.

I always feel sorry for those children with two or three double barrelled, misspelled names to make what would otherwise be a very dull child seem interesting.

The kaidy-mae, mollie-Jayne, ameelyia-ryleigh-Mai's of the world.

Fucking teachers nightmare. I substituted a class with four Kayleigh's in it all spelled completely differently. 🙄

sirfredfredgeorge · 17/01/2018 11:43

I'm sure it's lots of peoples, but it is equally not lots of peoples, it doesn't make yours right and others wrong.

itsonlysubterfuge · 17/01/2018 11:45

My DD is named after an ancient weapon that killed a lot of people....

It's a beautiful name!

Eolian · 17/01/2018 11:47

Because unless it's a name that is rarely used apart from in the context of something negative or unpleasant, it doesn't really matter.

Ophelia is a good example - it's a nice-sounding name and nobody is going to meet a little Ophelia and think "OMG she must be disturbed and suicidal". You very quickly get used to a name simply being associated with the person it belongs to.

I think it's weird that people get so hung-up on the meanings of names. Even the most commonly-used names originally had a meaning, but the meaning has largely become irrelevant. It's not as if you can make your child turn out gifted by giving them a name that means 'gifted' etc.

Battleax · 17/01/2018 11:47

It's not "mine".

And you did just say it isn't "anyone else's" either. So don't you believe in culture? Haven't you travelled?

These are all anglophone names being discussed in the context of anglophone cultures. That's broad but it's also specific.

FlaviaAlbia · 17/01/2018 11:57

I'm sure little Trebuchet is lovely itsonlysubterfuge

BertrandRussell · 17/01/2018 12:11

I was thinking Morning-Star. Surely Trebuchet is more of a boy’s name?

Incidentally, if I meet an Ophelia I don’t think “She must be suicidal and disturbed”. I think, briefly, “Blimey, her parents can’t be terribly well educated” and move on.

BertrandRussell · 17/01/2018 12:16

“Met a little girl called Helvetica, yoyotogogo?

Well, PG Wodehouse did say that there is some raw work pulled at the font....”

Excellent work!

MrsKoala · 17/01/2018 12:24

I thought Trebuchet too!

Why would they not be well educated Bertrand?

MrsKoala · 17/01/2018 12:30

It seems the smug assumption on here is that if someone has a name which is a tragic character in literature/history/mythology that the parents were clueless of this. This totally baffles me. Surely the more logical conclusion (well to me anyway) is that the parents were well aware of the name (otherwise how would they have heard of it?) and it's connotations and chose it exactly because they like it and even like the tragic story it came from.

What's wrong with liking a tragic romantic character that came to an unfortunate end. Don't any of you have any romance in your soul!?

RhiannonOHara · 17/01/2018 12:42

if I meet an Ophelia I don’t think “She must be suicidal and disturbed”. I think, briefly, “Blimey, her parents can’t be terribly well educated” and move on.

How very rude.

Is it not possible that people might know the origin or meaning of names but choose them anyway, 'well educated' or not?

DioneTheDiabolist · 17/01/2018 12:48

I think most people who get hung up on names because of certain connotations are just being pretentious and trying to show off.

Incidentally, if I meet an Ophelia I don’t think “She must be suicidal and disturbed”. I think, briefly, “Blimey, her parents can’t be terribly well educated” and move on.

You may have a point Finklestein.
😂😂😂

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