What does this MEAN?!

[dolladollabeale]

AIBU to not understand what the FUCK this means.

So me and my ex split up and shortly after I found out I was pregnant. We remained split but stayed friends. All fine

More recently however, we've started talking all the time, it's lovely. Whenever we've seen each other the last few times, we've ended up sleeping together. (Really stupid I know to be muddling up a relationship when the baby should be #1 priority and we should be focusing simply on co-parenting but these things happen.)

So anyway I asked him last night what the fuck is actually going on with us. Like how does he feel about me? Where are we going with this? It needs to be sorted before baby is born because things are getting confusing.
His response...

Totally ignored everything I'd said and just replied this morning saying: "have a happy day you lovely and pretty girl xxx"

We never put kisses when we talk we don't say cutesie things to each other like that either we just talk about silly stuff and have a laugh.

So.. What the fuck!? Have not responded, probably just going to leave it. Can't read into it at all. AIBU to be completely Fucking confused and think that's a really shit weird response to something so serious.

Sorry for sounding like a teenager 🙄

he's an immature DICK.. who is getting free sex on tap

"but these things happen."

Well they do if neither of you say no like a grown up.

How did he just avoid your whole question?

After reading just one post about him, I feel exhausted.

I also couldn't understand at first. I was like - what you asked him something and he didn't answer till the morning? Strange.

Dawned on me - oh, texting!

Ye gods OP. This is a bit more important than texting and putting kisses on messages. He's using you by the sounds of it anyway.

Ring him, tell him you need to have a face to face conversation, and ask him then whether your relationship is going anywhere with you as a couple, or whether you are simply a friend with benefits who is having his child.

Pengggwn Sat 13-Jan-18 14:29:57
Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar

What's being pregnant got to do with having sex?

Sorry, Pengggwn, but this did just make me snigger wildly, when it appeared in my list of comments for this thread. OBVIOUSLY in context it makes perfect sense but as a stand-alone, it's hilarious!

I know the synchronicity of falling back into the arms (and bed) of the man who is the father to your child is in some way 'destined to be', but please don't fall for it.

There were solid reasons you broke up I assume? They haven't gone.

I think he's taking advantage of your vulnerable emotional state.

He may be taking advance but we don't know that. I'd have fucked a wall when pregnant if I'd needed to .. does no one remember pregnancy hormones and that bastard libido rise?

But no, he's not interested in anything serious. His message is ridiculous and child like.

And also, the way he phrased the morning text makes me want to be a little bit sick in my mouth. It sounds.....insincere.

1. most likely the text wasn't meant for you (sorry).
2. he's massively swerved the question, so wants to avoid it.
3. he agrees that things are great and is wanting more
4. he loved what you said
5. he's just enjoying the sex

Only you know him, so what does you head say (not your heart or fanjo)????

Text was meant for someone else sorry

Ring him and have a proper talk

Op, I'm also guessing you still have feelings for Him and want to get back together?

How did he get the text, was it WhatsApp so you know he read it? Becayse another explanation is he hasn't seen it. Or wants you to think he hasn't.

Hard to be certain what it might mean, but do you think it's possible it means, "I'm too immature to take responsibility for babies and stuff like that but I enjoy sex so let's keep meeting up for fun and I'll ignore the pregnancy for as long as I can"?

You know exactly where you are with him. You are an available fuck buddy. If he wanted to be in a serious relationship with you he would be.

Don't sell yourself short. Concentrate on co parenting with this man and find someone who wants you for more than sex and a laugh.

On a practical note, if he is sleeping with other people you must be vigilant about using protection with him. STDs can be harmful to an unborn baby.

Don't dance to his tune. He needs to be serious and mature about this. He's going to be a dad soon so needs to grow the fuck up and start having adult conversations.

Ask yourself, what do YOU want? I think it is time to take control of the situation. Maybe you have to do this in different or subtle way? I mean rather than asking him straight out?

As others have said - it means he's a big time waster

He's using you and messing with your head. Have you had the baby yet?

It never occurred to me that the text was meant for someone else.

OP you have every right to be confused and yes, you need to meet up and find out what on earth is going on in his head.

good luck

It means he's using you for sex

I wouldn't jump to the conclusion that the text was meant for someone else. Just sounds like him avoiding the answer and hoping that calling you lovely and pretty would mean you were so flattered you'd drop it. Which makes him a tosser.

So anyway I asked him last night what the fuck is actually going on with us. Like how does he feel about me? Where are we going with this? It needs to be sorted before baby is born because things are getting confusing.

And he replied,

have a happy day you lovely and pretty girl xxx

I can almost picture him patting you on the head in a patronising way saying yes thats nice dear.

He's added the compliment and extra kisses so that you are so enamoured with the amazing extra unexpected text affection that your pretty head will be swayed by his gracious outpouring and deflected from asking him anymore deep questions that might interfere with the sex on tap.

OP you say More recently we've started talking all the time, which is lovely
What on earth are you talking about then? It sure isn't your future plans, your hopes for your unborn child, the practicalities of co parenting, how you feel...I could go on!