feel like the worlds worst mother

[willothewisp17]

introducing my daughter to baby foods with more texture, she will be 7 months on the 28th of jan, but was 10 weeks prem so a little behind development wise.

I made all her purées from scratch (please don't accuse me of a stealth boast, I try my hardest to do everything perfect for her because she had such a hard beginning) and felt the it was the time to move onto purées with a little more texture and flavour because she scoffs everything she eats just now. so first thing I made on yesterday night was rice, peas and mint puréed but still with small bits of rice. today I made a carrot, chickpea and coriander purée (much smoother than the rice and peas).

heated up the rice, pea and mint dinner with back up smooth carrot and lentil in case she didn't like the peas and rice.

she didn't like it, she gagged and brought up what little she had of it and brought up her previous milk.

This is where baby led weaning works a treat. Babies who start on purée learn to swallow food but not to chew/mush it up themselves so once you add lumps they gag etc. Giving a baby whole food means they have to mush it themselves before they can swallow it and in the long run they tend to ‘get it’ ie be eating ‘normal’ meals much sooner.

Try Ella’s pouches. Nothing but nice food, no additives etc, then you can’t be annoyed when they don’t want it cos all you did was twist off the lid!

There is a lot of waisted food but that where remembering the mantra ‘food for fun til 1’ helps.

feel like a terrible mother for being angry It's normal to be angry! You've put effort into something, and it's been refused. What would be being a terrible mother is if you then took it out on her. You can't help what you feel; you can decide how you are going to respond to your feelings.

This is one of the reasons i did blw - watching a friend get unbelievably upset & stressed when her baby wouldnt eat the puree she had made because she felt angry about all her effort going to waste.
Blw - make food, let them nick it from your plate or in DD2s case be passed stuff by DS when we werent looking

No idea if blw is appropriate for prem babies & def not if not sitting unaided.

Anger is normal, forgive yourself. Do what you can to make prep easier, buy stuff if it would be less stressful. You cant make it perfect for your daughter but you are the perfect mother for her because she is yours

And remember if she appears to hate something leave it, and try again in a few days. You often find the food they hated they will love, and the food they loved they hate.
They are funny little creatures!

Don't feel bad, we all have moments ...

I would say though - don't put your love/effort/expectations/investment into food. That way lies many tears for you both, and food issues in the future. It's just food.

it's the first purée she's refused, and she eats some finger foods and does not gag on them at all! she eats the ellas kitchen melty puffs and when small bits of them break off in her mouth and she chews them and swallows! she just didn't like what I made today and I took it to heart, when I know I shouldn't have.

I started off all lovingly making it. He gets Ella mostly, now, because he chucks it at me.

I also used to get very frustrated and just exhausted after preparing food for DS only for him to reject it. My life hack was to just give him whatever we were eating (a baby friendly version) pureed a bit so at least I wasn't cooking separately for him. I'd also make extra at dinner so he could have it for lunch the next day. Has made things much easier.

Just make a little extra or take some food off your plate and give it to her either blended or unblended. Nothing is then being wasted and there is no extra effort. That's what I did as there's no way I could afford pouches or separate extra meals. I don't put salt in my cooking as I don't like it/feel the need to so it was all fine for him.

I hated the weaning phase as I was always cooking fresh organic puréed blah blah blah but my baby with reflux would always bring it up! I used to feel really pissed off.

Good news is it doesn’t last long, soon it will be chicken nuggets and chips for tea