Could being unusually placid be a sign something is wrong?

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I am worried about my 3 years old.
I see a lot of post on here about toddler behaviour that is normal and my DD does none of these things. She is incredibly well behaved but I don’t think this is normal. She doesn’t push boundaries and I am worried that she’s so placid that she will be taken advantage of and bullied when she starts school in September. Does anyone else have a child like this?

Aibu to think maybe this is not normal behaviour? My DP thinks I am being silly but I just don’t want her to have a hard time at school.

My DD1 aged 4 is like this, she’s really good and well behaved. She currently goes to nursery a few days a week which I think has helped. I do worry she’ll be pushed around at school, but ultimately I know she’ll do well as she is kind and gentle, which are excellent character traits. I’ve been working on her with what to do if other children are pushy with her.

Ds3 was very much like you've described. A very placid baby who never really cried then a lovely well behaved toddler etc. He's always been no trouble at all unlike his siblings and has grown into a lovely adult.

Make the most of it I say

Dd1 was exactly like this. She's in year 2 now and has never had any problems. The school sing her praises when it comes ti behaviour and she has lots of friends.

Dd2 more than makes up for her good behaviour though!

And they never had any problems with being bullied?

She absolutely nothing like any of us it worries me!

DS 1 is like this very placid and chilled out always has been, no bullying but we have enrolled in karate for general resilience.

DS2 is the polar opposite

ds1 was like this. I thought I was super mum, He is popualr in school, never in trouble, I never need to tell him off. I had similar concerns to you but he has no issues in school. then I had ds2. turns out im not super mum and this ones mugs me off daily. I habe different concerns about him starting school. mainly that the school is ready for him 🙈

My oldest was like this. Quiet, compliant, only once had a tantrum (and fell asleep straight after so more than likely caused by tiredness)

He got on fine at school. Always quiet and well behaved. Never had a problem with bullying. Someone tried when he started secondary, he shrugged his shoulders and walked off!

He's 18 now and a pain in the arse with his siblings, but generally well behaved and still quiet.

I’m pregnant with number 2 and worrying if I will cope with a baby that was not like DD! She was so easy and I still struggled!

My DD was like this and was bullied terribly in primary school. She was very bright and the other girls didn't like it. She never had a problem with the boys, in fact they were very supportive.

This was my eldest dd too. And no, she didn't get bullied. She also always had an ability to let other people's unpleasantness pass by without caring too much about it. Just super laid back!

My eldest is like this. Very passive. Can be noisy and full of it but only at home and is generally very hesitant.

However: really popular at school, always had lots of friends, no bullying, loves school.

Don't worry until you need to!

Oh and we thought of martial arts etc and had exactly the same fears. He wasn't interested at all!

funily enough I have recently been looking into martial arts. I think we will start it soon.
the little one makes me cry regularly, he is such hard work but, funny and loving in a way that is incredible. You will be fine. take each day as it comes and once I realised it wasnt me, he jusy has a different personality and needs different discipline, it got mich better. good luck

the added bonus of a placid elder sibling is we had no sibling jealousy. Eldest just wanted to help me and is happy playing by himself if im busy peeling littlest down from climbing furniture.

I had 2 boys like this. Placid, content and easy to please. I did used to wonder what people were talking about when they said 'terrible twos' or 'tantrums'.

They never had any issues with bullying and they are now 2 very nice teenagers with loads of friends.

My DS1 was like this. Very well behaved and compliant but as a toddler never let anyone push him around. he was bullied in primary and it really knocked him. They decided he may be borderline aspergers but we think he probably isn't. Now 17 still very quiet and socially anxious and shy. Hasn't had any bullying issues in High school though and has a great group of friends.

I'm not saying any of this will happen to your DD but it's good that you are aware of it. DS was always comfy in his own skin if that makes sense, he was just unfortunate enough to be in class with an arsehole child born of arsehole parents who decided to make himself feel better by belittling my son and then got others to join in.

I'd maybe be doing things with her to increase her confidence with strangers such as paying for things in shops, passing on verbal messages etc.

My DD2 has always been very placid and laid back. She is 20 yo now and is still calm, easy going and lovely. She has always had loads of friends. He friends love her as she is loyal, keeps the peace, has no side. She is no pushover though and is very confident in herself and the choices she makes. She is very relaxing to have around.

I do wish she would argue with me a little bit, just so I can see that she can stand up for herself. The women in my family are very.... loud with our opinions so I hope that we will rub off on her a bit

Dd is year 4. As a toddler she had 2 tantrums (I remember them clearly), was brilliantly behaved (could take anywhere, put to bed anywhere etc) and genuinely lovely to be around.

I worried for a couple of years that she was a bit shy, but now I'm pretty sure she's a slight introvert. Very confident, got a good group of friends and very bright, but also very comfortable in her own company. Lives writing and drawing etc. Only complaint is that she rarely opens up to me.

DS is an absolute bloody nightmare and wouldn't do anything he was supposed to!!! Constant tantrums and at 4 is still ridiculously dramatic!

I would say that's how mine was at 3. She is just thoughtful and sensitive. These are good qualities to have. She is turning 5 now and in school and it hasn't been an issue. We have had to talk a bit about boundaries and assertiveness. For instance, what to say to other children if they aren't respecting her personal space, she doesn't want to hug them, doesn't want to play with them right now, etc. and also what to do if someone is unkind to her. But I think this is normal for school age children. There are kids who are overly aggressive and bullying and there are ones who are more reserved and hold back and can tend to be picked on sometimes. Personally, I'd rather have mine be the latter as I think it's easier to address. We've helped her understand how to assert herself and how to reach out for help from an adult if another child (or adult) isn't being kind to her or making her feel uncomfortable. It's been perfectly fine. We've had a few incidents at school with other kids being mean to her and upsetting her (but that's normal in school anyway!) but she's handled it really well. I don't think you have anything to worry about. Just when anything happens, and it eventually will, use it as an opportunity to have a discussion about boundaries and assertiveness and how to ask for help when she needs it.

I do have to regularly ask her about whether everything is ok at school. Apparently everything is always "fine". Don't think she's ever been bullied, and she does stand her ground when she feels strongly. It's Just that isn't as often as other children.

Don't worry! My teens that were the most placid small boys, will debate that black is white and night is day. They are both very opinionated.

I used to wish my DD2 would argue with me too. DD1 and i were always having loud disagreements and i found it strange that she didn't seem to stand up for herself. As she has got older i realise that she sees arguing as pointless. She will stand up for herself quietly and with determination but will not ever be noisy about it. I actually think she is more sure of herself than either me or DD1!

My youngest is exactly like this. She was born smiling and has been a little ray of sunshine since. That said, whilst she is placid, well behaved and eager to please, she has always been able to stick up for herself, and as a consequence has never been bullied, and is extremely confident. She seems well liked at school, and although we moved and she had to start a new school, she has made new friends easily.

My youngest is like this, never really needs telling off at home, never been in trouble at school. Makes a welcome change from my eldest