Is sexting as bad as cheating

[lessthanwise]

I'm just wondering what people think about this as a stand alone question. I think sexting is pretty bad but I think actually, physically sleeping with someone else is much, much worse.

I think you can come back from sexting but probably not from cheating.

AIBU?

Yes. For me, yes. But it will vary per individual

You again did you not get anything from
The last thread you created!

I'm just curious, without any context, what people think. Maybe I'm being a total idiot.

You got a full thread of answers already. Hes a cheat he cheated with you on both your partners. He is now dealing with an unwanted unplanned pregnancy and feels trapped. He is already lining up his next fling, the moment he has his opportunity he will cheat. If he felt trapped in his marriage and finally gained his freedom then he would certainly feel trapped in family life. He didn’t sign up to this, he even had other partners following his marriage ending. He is no Prince Charming and your no Cinderella. This ending won’t be a happy one op.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3131916-Is-this-just-what-I-deserve?msgid=74608797#74608797

I thought perhaps the context may have skewed some answers. So I was wondering as a yes/no thing how people felt and if anyone felt similarly to me but I think you might've spoilt that slightly now...

Starting a new thread without the background story isn’t going to change that

Truth hurts op but are you really surprised. Your friend told you the truth because that’s what friends do they don’t pull any punches. Everyone else on mn tonight some sympathic to your situation have told you the same. He doesn’t want another woman living with him doing the mundane things in live on top dealing with a newborn. He wants to be free and single. The fact he’s 10years younger says it all. You are completely at different stages of your lives. You might just realise now the grass wasn’t greener on the other side.

Yes because it is an emotional affair of sorts?

I wouldn’t say as bad but it’s still far worse than I’d accept

"I thought perhaps the context may have skewed some answers"

It won't skew mine. Because whether and how bad a betrayal it is is entirely up to the other (non-wandering) spouse/partner.

Different people have different views on what they find acceptable. Some might find it much harder to deal with the emotions than the physical act. Others will be the opposite. Some will find both intolerable.

I do believe you can shag someone as a random drunken foolish act.

Sexting is emotionally rewarding, it's about a connection and desiring someone else, visualising and fantasising what you can do with someone new. It takes thought and planning. It's knowing fully while you sit on your sofa or on your way to work that it would be hurtful to your partner.

Either one would be enough for me to divorce him.

Yes, it’s like actively pursuing someone else even if they aren’t actually fucking. Talking to someone else about fucking them is not someone I want to be in a relationship with.

Without context yes. Absolutely. Because the intent is there. Once someone values and loves you so little they have moved on emotionally it’s only a matter of time before it’s physical.

It would be the end of a relationship for me. No questions. And anyone who puts up with that and forgives is a bit of a doormat and very naive in my opinion.

Why have you started another thread?

Oh dear

At least name change if you want replies "out of context"

Although my responses to you on your other thread still stand, no matter what the situation

Both as bad as each other

Is this a joke?! 😆. Seriously though is it?!

Ok, maybe this might help:

If someone is even thinking about someone else OP, they AREN'T thinking of you! That's it! Tardar!

It's not nice to say but you know he's an arse and you do get what you deserve!

But he wasn't just talking about sex, was he ?

He was saying how trapped he felt, with you being pregnant, and how he wishes he could be with her

Much like he was doing to his wife with you

Did you sext with him when yiu were both cheating?

Actually AF I think he was talking sex and OW said he was trapped and sent naked pics of herself.