AIBU to be fed up of judgyness??

[SquirmyWormy]

Aware I am in for a flaming but it really pisses me off being judged negatively for having tattoos. I'm a sensible 30 year old educated professional who is married with children but the fact that I have tattoos means that some mumsnet posters seem to think all those with tattoos are the fucking anti christ.
I love my tattoos. I love how they look and how they make me feel.
I do not get tattoos so that people I meet in RL deem it appropriate to make comments like 'I hate tattoos.'
Well I hate people who judge others for how they look rather than the person they are.

I like tattoos...but only really good ones, which most aren't. The vast majority of tattoos I see on people are poorly executed and look pretty crap.

I haven't got any because I haven't got the spare cash for the kind of tattoo I'd want, which would would be costly. No high street scratcher is getting anywhere near me!

some mumsnet posters seem to think all those with tattoos are the fucking anti christ

Just go with it OP, carry an upside down cross and spit pea soup at people - they won’t care about the tattoos then

YANBU BTW

I think tattoos look shit, I am allowed to think this just as you are allowed to get them. I don’t think any less of people for getting them though, that’s just silly.

I always find this a weird one - you would never tell someone you “hate” their top or dress but people do feel it’s ok to say they hate tattoos to people’s faces!
I don’t like them for me, but if someone else has one I don’t automatically assume they’re in the Hells Angels!

I love tattoos. Well, some of them. Some are obviously shit, but some are great and everything in between.

I’ve got one. It’s pretty discreet, but I’ve never had anything but positive comments from people who see it. Obviously, some people see it and don’t mention it, which is maybe polite people who don’t like it, but don’t want to say.

My parents hated tattoos and my sister does too actually. It doesn’t bother me. They never comment about my tattoo, just say they hate them in general, the way I might say I hate an item of clothing. It doesn’t get to me as it’s so personal. I dislike north-face-type gilets, for example. No good reason, I just don’t like them. I bet gilet fans couldn’t care less what I think .

"Vile"
"Disfigured"
"Rough"

Same shit, different day.

some mumsnet posters seem to think all those with tattoos are the fucking anti christ

they really don't.

Self harm? You see tattoos as self harm?? What about pearcings then? I take it you prob have your ears pearced

I hate the judgemental culture in rl (and probably MN too although it's easier ignored). I personally like tattoos and wouldn't judge, I do have to stop myself asking sometimes what they mean as frankly it's none of my damn business
I have one on the back of my shoulder in memory of my twins.
However people always find something to judge I suppose

You have every right to do whatever you like with your body! Other people are entitled to their views on how that looks, but expressing those views publicly is incredibly rude and tacky. Not to mention that anybody who judges others on the basis of their tattoos and not their personality is denying themselves the opportunity to meet all kinds of interesting and delightful people.

My boyfriend has tattoos and I'm sure its because of the one on his neck that we get followed around tesco when we go late night shopping and are literally the only customers.

I wouldn't have myself though.

Some people don't really like tattoos and getting them is a bit of a statement. You can't be mad at people for hearing your statement. It's a tough one.

My brother in law said people with tattoos don't ever get good jobs. To be fair, I judged him as an arse at that point.

I think it depends on whare and what they are as pp said.
Having "white power" high on a neck is not going to go down well.
Having a non offensive tattoo anywhere outside of face? Meh. Nothing special nowadays

I really don’t like tattoos and don’t think they look nice.

But I don’t judge anyone for having them. They’re just not my thing.

I’m one of very few “cleanskins” I know so I find this judgement odd, though that might be a cultural difference.

Just ignore them. I’ve had countless people tell me they don’t like various things about my appearance throughout my life, including things I was born with. I just tell them I’m happy with myself the way I am.

There seem to be a lot of people on this thread saying tattoos are “making a statement”. The people I know with tatts usually have something that’s meaningful for them. I don’t think they’re trying to make a statement.

Um, my very dear friend, who has three professional degrees, has Ta Moko. She is tattooed on her chin. It means a great deal in her/our culture, and was a culmination of much beautiful ceremony. It is not 'self-harming', it is a great honour that she wears with much dignity. Along with some pretty bloody amazing tattoos on her back, her arm, and her leg.

Perhaps some people need to realise that their bubble isn't the only one that exists. Judge not lest ye be bloody judged.

On the other hand, the dudge with the swastika on the neck, the face, and the jail tats on his hands - yeah, I'll judge. I'll judge him as a person that's giving me a really clear indication that we're possibly not going to see eye to eye.

I'm not keen on tattoos so you know what? I didn't get any.

What other people want to do is no concern of mine. You can't tell whether someone's nice or not just by looking at them after all (unless they have a swastika or something equally vile, of course).

I have to say though, surely you know what people can be like? It seems a little naive to have tattoos thinking nobody will say anything negative - of course they shouldn't but the fact is, they do. If you'll pardon the pun, you need to grow a thicker skin.

YANBU

I think tattoos can be beautiful - they are art after all. I wouldn’t want one personally only because I don’t love any design enough to have it on my skin forever.

I work in a big professional firm in London and one of my colleagues has a sleeve, blue hair and piercings - no-one bats an eyelid!

This may be rare but it’s great

Also.... There is a tattoo and there is the tattoo, which can obviously make giant difference in how the person with ink is perceived...

I have none. I have no issues with people having some, but gosh, people should really do their research on tattoo artists before committing to something what is quite difficult and painful to remove...

I wouldn’t have tattoos but that’s just me. Each to their own. Most People wouldn’t want my fat arse but I don’t care. Enjoy your tattoos.

I have tattoos and love them so no negative judging from me on that score, however I think it's a bit naive to say you could cover them but don't and people should hire you regardless. I'm only 14 years older than you but when I had my first tatts they were still a subcultural/rebellious thing to have and no way could you get a 'decent' job with them on display. I covered mine for work, took my piercings out etc and it's relatively recent that they've become mainstream and more acceptable. Some of my kids teachers have tattoos and piercings but not many and it's still a statement that not everyone will respond positively or even neutrally too. If you want the job, cover them up at interviews so they hire you for your skills and then if you reveal them later it's not such a hurdle as they already want you. To say people who simply don't like them should not judge and hire you with them on full display is overly idealistic, and also making them more relevant than they should be. It's a distraction in that way, when what you want is to focus on the work. So yanbu to be fed up of judgyness, but equally yabu to actively court it when there's a simple fix. And when you're clearly not choosing that simple fix then you are making a strong statement that will not be to everyone's taste and they may just go with another candidate who seems more centred on giving them what they want.