Just need a bit of advice/perspective please:
Backstory: me and DH both work full time and have one D'S who is 14 months.
PIL agreed to help out and have him every Thursday whilst we both work (great). They started doing this from when he was 10 months old and we were both back at work. This means sometimes they have him overnight one night and sometimes just in the day.
MIL works full time and this is her day off, FIl is retired but now has a part time job. All was great until a few weeks ago when DS started going through a rough patch, starting tantruming and had one difficult night at their house where he didn't sleep much.
This has now resulted in Pils saying they don't feel able to have him every week now and given how he currently is it's not "convenient".
They have suggested trailing having him for a few hours every other week, and if he doesn't settle with them then cutting this down again.
Of course we don't expect them to have him and understand it's entirely their choice, and whilst I'm a bit annoyed at having to change all of our shifts so one of us is off the main issue is I'm not sure whether to agree to the few hours every other week.
His behaviour with them is no different to with us and entirely normal for a 14month old so not much to be done there I don't think. I feel sad and annoyed that the moment things have gotten a little difficult (as they do with children) they have dropped him. Although he's young and most likely won't notice I don't like the idea of whether or not they have him being dependent on whether he's currently going through a good stage or not. I'm also not keen on having an odd routine like every other week but only if he's in a good stage.
DH thinks we should trail the every other week.
AIBU in thinking that if you offer to look after your grandchild it should be on the understanding that they are children and as such behave like children. I'm tempted to say you take him as he is or not at all (They would still see him at family gatherings), or am I cutting off my nose to spite my face?