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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to keep wondering about getting a dog while working FT?

55 replies

majorstress · 24/04/2007 11:39

no one is home from 7 to 5 most days.

Could I send it to a dogminder? We live in London, there must be lots of crazy people who do that judging from the professional dogwalkers I see.

dd1 is deperate.

OP posts:
agnesnitt · 24/04/2007 11:43

I would think that if you're not there for that amount of time it's not actually worth having a dog. Suggest fish perhaps?

Agnes

BrownSuga · 24/04/2007 11:47

we have a dog and both work FT, BUT PIL pick her up EVERY day and have her at their house. I feel really sad when they're on holiday and doggie is home alone. if we didn't have that option, I would either have had 2 dogs or none.

Original poster
majorstress · 24/04/2007 11:48

got fish, got gerbil. I don't think it's worth it either but dd1 won't be budged and is now saving up to "buy" one herself.

OP posts:
sunnysideup · 24/04/2007 11:48

hmm, I agree with agnes...if everyone is out of the house for that long every day I really don't think it's the best idea. I'm sure you might find a dog minder but it seems crazy to pay someone else to enjoy the company of your own pet!

I honestly think though your dd is desperate, you would be better diverting her onto another pet - cats don't need the same level of care but they can be lovely company for kids....I also think it's a really good life lesson for kids to learn; with animals, it's not about what YOU want so much as whether you can care for them right...it's a good way of her being faced with the responsibilities of having a pet in my view, to have to realise that while she may want one, it wouldn't be ideal for the animal.

Original poster
majorstress · 24/04/2007 11:48

2 dogs is ok is it?

OP posts:
Original poster
majorstress · 24/04/2007 11:49

dh allergic to cats.

OP posts:
sunnysideup · 24/04/2007 11:50

oh that's a bummer majorstress

nickytwotimes · 24/04/2007 11:50

i was desparate for a dog when i was a kid and didn't get one cos both parents worked all the time. it won't do her any harm to not have one. perhaps you could do what my parents did? their pal had a lovely dog who i got to take for walks, cuddles, etc. got to enjoy it with none of the down sides!!

JustUsTwo · 24/04/2007 11:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
majorstress · 24/04/2007 11:52

so 2 dogs would be happy just to be walked at midday by paid person or something? and the rest of the time play nicely together (!) until we got home.

TBH I don't think it's worth having any pets toys garden or house being out this much but we do.

OP posts:
Piffle · 24/04/2007 11:52

I'm a SAHm with 2 kids at home one at school, one teenager and one hub who comes home every day and we are together all weekend
We have no time for our two dogs. Unless you are preared to commit serious time to walking before and after work
No.

JustUsTwo · 24/04/2007 11:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JillyBaby · 24/04/2007 11:54

Definitely not fair on the dog(s) to be left at home all day.
Dogminder doesn't sound very practical for the amount of time you're talking about.

Original poster
majorstress · 24/04/2007 11:54

thanks all. hmm, maybe she could get a little "job" to mind someone else's dog? she had aunties dog and loved it, poopscooped and all, for a day but they live in Ireland.

OP posts:
Blu · 24/04/2007 11:55

I was desparate for a dog when I was young - my parents just said no.

Dogs home alone, even two together, could bark incessantly and cause problems with your neighbours, (I speak as a former neighbour of out all day dog owners) and it isn't very kind. If your dd is keen on dogs, tell her how unhappy and lonely the dog will be.

Everyone I know who got a dag to leave alone in the house has to take it to work...or get rid of it.

Is she old enough to volunteer at weekends at a city farm or dog centre or something?

Soapbox · 24/04/2007 11:55

Contact your local rehoming charity and see whether they do a dog walking scheme. You can usually take the dog out for a long walk at the weekend which might be enough for her now.

Alternatively, she can sponsor a guide dog for the blind - it will be her dog and she will get regular updates as to how the dog is getting on and pictures she can stick on her wall etc.

It would be irresponsible to get a dog in your situation no matter how much your child wants one. I think learning that sometimes we don't get what we wish for is an important lesson in childhood. Crushingly disappointing for her - but she will get over it in time.

Hopeitwontbebig · 24/04/2007 11:55

Hmm, I think it also depends on the type of dog you get. We've got a Golden Retriever and they're really ok at being left, they just sleep sleep sleep. Also if you're going to employ a dog walker I think it would be ok. Would you walk the dog before going to work? That would be quite important.

If you're seriously considering it, you def need to be careful which breed. I do know that smaller dogs have a tendency to be destructive (from personal experience)

JustUsTwo · 24/04/2007 11:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

empie · 24/04/2007 11:58

I know where you're coming from - I'd love a dog too, but, what's the point when you won't hardly ever see it? Not very fair on the doggie in question. Dogs need more than walking, they need stimulation just like babies do. How about at cat, they're more self-sufficient?

Original poster
majorstress · 24/04/2007 11:59

yes would walk dog before work and after. how do I find local shelter? she is only 6 so I would have to go with her.

poor dd2 has decided that cats are her bag, but not only is dh allergic, she has excema and constant rhinitis so I haven't even considered a cat (I always had them and really miss having pets, but don't really want a poor dog alone all day).

OP posts:
Original poster
majorstress · 24/04/2007 12:01

sponsoring a good idea, she really likes sponsoring a chimp at Whipsnade (an xmas request I was very dubious about).

OP posts:
haggisaggis · 24/04/2007 12:01

We did it with our last dog - but I would not do it again. I think ours got used to just sleeping all day - and he got a lot of atention in teh evening. But it really isn't fair and I would definitely not do it again.
My parents had 2 dogs when I was working but still staying at home. My mum was usually at home with them - and all was fine. However, my parents went on holiday for a month so dogs were left each day(although I went home for lunch!) During that month they conspired among other things to - pull a feather duvet off teh bed and rip it to shreds (feathers all dwon teh stairs), chew up teh cusions of the brand new 3 piece suite. Moral - don't get 2 - It'll be worse!

sunnysideup · 24/04/2007 12:02

yes, meant to say that barking while owners are out can be a truly maddening and depressing thing for the neighbours!

I thought her volunteering for dog walking might be lovely; how about contacting the local age concern or something, there are people who can't get out to walk their dogs like they should.......

Is the cat issue a real no-no for your dh? We didn't get a cat for aaaaaages when I was a kid as my bro was allergic, but in the end we got a very short haired kitten as my uncle had a litter to home (bro had spent some time with the kittens and seemed ok so we gave it a go) and it was fine....do you think it could be a possibility for your dh to cope with a very short haired cat?

kslatts · 24/04/2007 12:03

We have a dog, when we got her I worked part time and dh was a courier so most days he took the dog in the van with him and would stop in a park for lunch and walk her.

I have now gone back to work full time and dh works shifts (where he can no longer take the dog), dh usually has 2 rest days during the week and on the other 3 days he will usually start work really early and finish around lunchtime, start late and finish really late or work a split shift where he gets about 4 hours off in the middle of the day. Some weeks the dog will be on her own for 3 or 4 half days (up to 5 hrs each time) that's the most I'd leave her for, otherwise I don't think it's fair on her. Our dog is a border collie so also needs loads of exercise, we take her for 2 long walks a day and at weekends we usually take her out for most of the day on at least one of the days. The children do love spending time with her, but it is a big commitment. You also need to consider holidays, we tend to go on 1 holiday abroad each year and are lucky that my parents look after her for us, we also go away in the UK or visit in-laws in Ireland and the dog comes with us.

nigelslaterfan · 24/04/2007 12:04

I think it's not fair.
I think a dog needs more than even a walk during the day. They are hugely sociable.
Dogs should be on farms, on the land, working or with people most of the time. Not fair otherwise imho!