Children freezing in buggies

[goody2shooz]

Would you sit outside on a chair for an hour in the current weather, wearing leggings and a mid thigh-length jacket, no hat, gloves or blanket? No? Thought not - so why do so many people keep putting children in buggies without enough proper warm clothes/blanket etc!!?? Just been for a walk today in 1degree cold weather, wind chill makes it feel like -4. Came across a granmother standing chatting to two friends. All dressed in gloves, hats and parka types COATS cos of the cold weather. Little tot in pushchair facing into the cold wind wearing leggings and a jacket. Her little hands looked frozen- like the rest of her. I said (nicely)to the woman that the lo looked v chilly. Was ignored. tried again and was ignored. Wibu to mention anything? I am amazed that so many people seem unaware that a small person sitting still in a buggy needs more layers under and over them than the person keeping warm pushing the buggy. I feel so bad for these tots i keep seeing with pinched faces and blue hands. :(

tried relentlessly until the most stubborn child you could imagine finally wore the extra layers.
I'd rather do this than fail and make them ill, it's a parents job.

What if they were then too hot?
Surely you see that different adults have different temperature regulation, why do you think that all children need the same number of layers?
You don't get ill from being a bit cold.
It's important to help children identify their own feelings and moods. Insisting they are definitely feeling cold if they are actually perfectly comfortable isn't helpful.

"you don't get ill from being a bit cold".....no of course not, but you do get ill from being very cold for a period of time, and that's what people are talking about here. We all know when it's a bit cold and very cold!! It's all very well letting children recognise their own moods but it's up to us as adults to make sure they are warm and safe. We are the bigger people here, we are responsible and it's about being sensible. Ensuring a child is warm is more important than letting them identify their own moods and freezing to death!!! They are colder than you sat in the buggy still, than you are walking around.

Tabby

And if my child were too cold, they would let me know, just like they do when they are too hot.

My son will take off/refuse foot muff, hat, gloves etc you can find them all under my pushchair!

Not all would Valentina. Children often go quiet when very very cold.Its the shock setting in. I still stand with us being the responsible adult and having to make decisions to keep them warm whether they like it or not when it's very very cold. I'm talking about wintery temperatures, not just a bit cold.

I saw a woman in a puffy winter jacket today carrying a tiny baby wearing just a sleepsuit and booties, no jacket/snowsuit/blanket etc. YANBU

Ensuring a child is warm is more important than letting them identify their own moods and freezing to death!!!

Got any stats on how many children have frozen to death in pushchairs in the UK . Or even suffered serious illness or frostbite?

I do ensure my child is warm. Just because their level of clothing doesn’t meet your approval doesn’t mean you are allowed to lecture me or decide that they “must” be freezing or are cold enough to make them ill. They are warm, yes warm enough without a hat/scarf/ski suit/cosy toes.

I think i know my child better than a random stranger. If i thought they were cold i would do something, but they aren’t, whatever you think.

What can you do if your child won’t wear hats, gloves or blankets?

I put tights on under jeans and trousers, but do worry about little fingers and ears.

Oh and mine won’t tolerate a footmuff. Sticks feet outside without fail.

My mother still comments on how I MUST be cold and tries to get me to wear more layers. I'm not! I remember sweltering as a child in snow suits.

My 4yo wore a hat, gloves, coat, extra blankets etc when she was tiny. She happily wears what I advise her to now as well. But the months between 18m and 3y? Not a fucking chance! And yet she survived.

I have forgotten to put a blanket round my son before when it was cold and it didn't occur to me until we were out - luckily we weren't going far. If anyone had said something there wiuld't have been anything I could have done at the time because I didn't have a blanket with me. I doubt most people carry extra blankets with them that they aren't using so even if you speak to a reasonable person it's not going to achieve anything.

When it comes to gloves, some kids hate them. My daughter would often refuse gloves when she was a baby.

So I don't think you should say anything. I don't see the point.

Perhaps the child didn't want a hat, gloves or blanket? My child who at 12 is still a buggy user, didn't and doesn't.

Gosh I remember the time my dd had a raging temperature from he men B vaccination and we were at the gp (cos I was being pfb). She was wailing her head off so I took her outside the surgery in just a thin babygro to try and cool her off. This lady took issue with me and kept telling me to wrap her up. Wouldn't listen when I said she was too hot.
Public criticism is the last thing you need as a sleep deprived first time mum with a poorly wailing young baby .

Tbh op it's not your place to criticise (and it is criticism however 'nicely' you say it) I'm not surprised she ignored you. Babies are more likely to die from over heating than cold in the the U.K. I'm sure their parents are doing there best.

Not really any different to seeing a a baby red in the face crying because they have multiple layers under a fleece onesie when the shops have the heating on.

Didn't say anything to the mother as not my business and she was leaving the shop to go outside. If she had taken the onesie off people may have criticised.
Not every child wants to cooperate. My dd is 6 and will sometimes wear gloves, other times not. She knows that they are there if her hands get cold. Nagging her to put them on will make her more determined not too.

I live in the Middle East and Arab mums are always telling me my son is too cold/he needs a blanket etc. It's 30+ degrees! The poor wee sod is wearing shorts and a t shirt, if I put a blanket on him he'll bake like a little potato!

I see the opposite to what OP is describing - babies in winter clothes when the sun is blazing. I saw a baby a few months ago who was wearing a sleep suit, hat and mittens and had been placed inside one of those big fluffy baby pouch things (no idea what they're called - like a big envelope??). It was summer! Temperatures hit 40+ every day!

8mo DD REFUSES to wear gloves or mittens. I put them on, she bites them off and drops on the floor. And repeat. We went out on the school run a few weeks ago and my hands were burning with the cold through my gloves. But she would not keep hers on.

In the end I zipped the footmuff up to her neck and trapped her hands inside it as I was genuinely worried about the circulation in her hands. But then of course we walked home with her screaming the place down in protest. Which I’m sure drew silent judgement from everyone we walked past.

You are damned if you do and damned if you don’t.

Where I live it happens because of poverty :(

I will give you a million pounds if you can get my toddler to wear her hat for longer than 2 minutes! Luckily she will tolerate the sheepskin footmuff for now...

Pretty sure my 13 month old is on the way to being one of these naked children. Hates hats, pulls mittens off, can shrug off a coat/cardigan. Nappy changing invariably involves a punch up trying to get him dressed again. Oh, and he pukes if he overheats, which is awesome.

He's still just small enough to zip into the pram footmuff but objects vociferously and has to be held in, he's not partial to the pram straps and refuses absolutely point blank to go in the carseat with a coat on, nearly broke my wrist last week attempting that I've managed this winter with a thermal all in one coat thing but can't see that happening beyond 18m or so.

My DM is the most judgemental about this kind of thing, so hearing it from a stranger would be nothing new

I feel the cold so try and wrap him up as much as possible. It's a battle of wills.

All in one snowsuits are your friend.

I have a perpetually warm child. Perfectly happy in 97% of British weather in t-shirt and shorts.

He hates trousers. In recent years since starting school, I can, by picking my arguments get him to wear trousers on the few occasions that it really matters because he now understands that I only ask him when I have a very good reason. About 360 days of the year he will happily wear shorts, even during the recent snow.

It's been much easier since he's been old enough to be vocal about what his clothing needs are. His toddler years were a bit of a misery for both of us in that department. By 2, he could strip far quicker than I could dress him and he couldn't articulate what about clothes offended him so much. He utterly rejected dungarees by 2.5 and I had to concede defeat on that fairly quickly. I remember lugging his coat around all bloody winter because he absolutely would not wear it, and I was so convinced that he'd love the vehicles all over it. I remember trying to dress him, sitting over him to pin him down in desperation, trying to get clothing on to his flailing limbs while he screamed and screamed. Trying to get him and a baby sibling out of the house was a very long, tedious battle every time.

With hindsight, it joins up that he is very fussy about texture of clothes and warmth level but I didn't know that at the time. Dominating and imposing my will over his simply did not work, so yes, I gave up after quite a long time and we are both so much happier for it.

Interestingly, at a science museum, the thermal imaging camera showed him glowing mostly white hot compared to me and his ("normal") brother glowing red hot with small patches of white.

So as long as a child shows no signs of distress, I'm happy to leave them be.
(Although I did judge the parents who let their little girl attend an event in just Brownie uniform, no coat or anything extra on an event that was lasting 2 hours outside and unsheltered on a well forecast sub-zero night. She ended up shivering under my blankets snuggled up with me as I was heavily pregnant and knew I'd get cold sitting in a camping chair so had taken extra layers to keep warm.)

TuftedLadyGrotto Sorry, but that really made me laugh- I've been telling you for decades that I'm not cold, mum!'

As the very cold parent of a warm child I tend to struggle to get him dressed, quite often he wears -1 layer compared to me and I virtually always take his coat and hat off in shops.

I do know what the OP is saying and I've seen kids that are freezing in PJs outside (too cold in this wind!) or visibly sweltering. Very big difference to a happy kid that seems to be wearing too little/ too much.

Ensuring a child is warm is more important than letting them identify their own moods and freezing to death!!!

But if the child is feeling warm in fewer clothes than consensus would like? That's what most of us are talking about here. Children who are perfectly happy without a hat or gloves, yet strangers tut and assume you are neglecting your child. Happens to me fairly often and it is really annoying when you know your own child and what keeps them comfortable. If I force these clothes on they will feel too hot and physically uncomfortable.

My dh was wearing a t shirt on a chilly day whilst everyone else had coats on. He was feeling warm. He runs warm. Should I have kept insisting he needed a coat? Telling him that he's wrong and he actually must be cold?

Yes obviously none of us are advocating letting a child freeze to death or suffer illness or injury from the cold.

But repeatedly insisting that someone is cold when they actually aren't is weird.

And some of the posters above are saying that their kids refuse clothes even if they are cold. Well obviously the parents need to use their own judgement, but realistically being a bit underdressed in the uk for short periods of time for most of the year isn't going to cause illness or harm. Yes there will be some days when it's really cold, or maybe you are going to be out for hours, or other factors, but most of the time short hops in the buggy aren't going to cause harm. Obviously the parent needs to weigh it all up, but as someone who personally has "sensory issues" towards some clothing/ fabrics I can say that I could find enforced clothing distressing in way that is almost physically painful. So I wouldn't necessarily force a child to wear clothes, unless yes I thought they were going to freeze to death, which is not what we are discussing here.

@Marcine it may look like leggings and a little jacket but there's usually a nappy, a long sleeved vest and a top and tights or socks on under the leggings and vest. The baby is cocooned in the car seat/buggy which gathers heat too. If I dressed my DS in coat/hat/scarf/gloves over his vest, jumper, trousers and socks the sweat would drip off him. All parents know it's safer and more comfortable for the child to keep them on the cooler side than the hotter side.