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AIBU?

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Original poster

Children freezing in buggies

306 replies

goody2shooz · 27/12/2017 15:31

Would you sit outside on a chair for an hour in the current weather, wearing leggings and a mid thigh-length jacket, no hat, gloves or blanket? No? Thought not - so why do so many people keep putting children in buggies without enough proper warm clothes/blanket etc!!?? Just been for a walk today in 1degree cold weather, wind chill makes it feel like -4. Came across a granmother standing chatting to two friends. All dressed in gloves, hats and parka types COATS cos of the cold weather. Little tot in pushchair facing into the cold wind wearing leggings and a jacket. Her little hands looked frozen- like the rest of her. I said (nicely)to the woman that the lo looked v chilly. Was ignored. tried again and was ignored. Wibu to mention anything? I am amazed that so many people seem unaware that a small person sitting still in a buggy needs more layers under and over them than the person keeping warm pushing the buggy. I feel so bad for these tots i keep seeing with pinched faces and blue hands. :(

OP posts:
x2boys · 27/12/2017 17:20

Indeed Sirzy.

gillybeanz · 27/12/2017 17:21

sirzy

I totally understand that some parents on here have children with sensory issues or other needs, my comment wasn't to those who find it impossible, they were to the ones that don't try or give in for an easy life.
One of ours was ill as a baby and needed lots of extra covers, it was an unknown virus, he was hospitalised and we were told to wrap him up warm, not too hot, obviously.

ConcreteUnderpants · 27/12/2017 17:22

EB123 my 20 month DS is the same.
Yes, I can see his toes look cold, thank you. Yes, I have got him some socks, thank you.

Unfortunately he's taken them off, along with his shoes, hat and blanket (he refuses to have his foot muff zipped up).

Weirdly he hates gloves, but will happily wear a sock on one hand, only.

My DS, as soon as she's home from school, she's stripped off down to her pants. Won't even wear slippers.

Experience has taught me that when my children aren't happy about something, they loudly let me know.
Evidently they like the cold!

Aragog · 27/12/2017 17:25

In the uk I find it much worse to see some little ones so bundled up they are red in the face and lethargic as they are too hot. And that seems way more common amongst parents. Baby looks too hot and uncomfortable but so over heated they've no energy to complain, and no way to regulate themselves.

Aragog · 27/12/2017 17:28

I'd rather do this than fail and make them ill, it's a parents job.

Yet in 15 years Dd has never fallen ill due to getting cold. So, maybe it's often just a case of knowing your own child well enough to know which battles are worth fighting.

Not like sun cream at all - burn from the sun is far worse and more damaging in almost all cases compared to getting cold in the UK. For me that is a battle worth fighting and it is also one that is easy to solve. Sun cream once on stays on. The toddler or baby can't remove it by flinging it on the floor or keep taking it off. The complaints only last whilst it is being applied in general, for those that do cry about it. So nothing like a comparison.

brizzledrizzle · 27/12/2017 17:31

You can certainly tell which parents here have children who have no sensory issues or other needs which make these battles impossible!

Quite. My youngest is NT but you wouldn't think so when you tried to do anything involving putting on warm shoes/hat or anything as controversial as buggy straps. I used to get asked 'what is wrong with it?' (it not him Angry)

TinklyLittleLaugh · 27/12/2017 17:32

Yes being too hot must be horrid and is probably more dangerous. I'm not sure about those baby sleeping bags people fasten their kids into: when mine were small the advice was to keep blankets loose so kids could kick them off.

timeforachangeithink · 27/12/2017 17:33

My 2.5 year old won't wear a hat or gloves and often takes off his socks and shoes. He is suspected to have autism so may be a sensory thing but it's not uncommon in babies and toddlers. Not your place to judge.

TabbyMumz · 27/12/2017 17:38

Cosytoes are such a fantastic invention, I have no idea why more people don't use them. Once on, they can't get them off. If they try, stop them!!! Or an all in one outfit with built in hood. You definately need them when it's -6 degrees out there.

IHaveBrilloHair · 27/12/2017 17:46

Remember as well how warm shops are, of course if we bundle them up in unremoveable tights and snowsuits, that dangerous inside right?
Find me a baby/toddler who enjoys getting their clothes taken off several times in a couple of hours, and a parent who wants to do it.
And before anyone says get childcare, there was none at all for Dd.

meandmytinfoilhat · 27/12/2017 17:51

My son would have dumped the hat and gloves and kicked off the blanket before removing his shoes and socks, that's young kids for you.

Some will tolerate winter clothing and some will not.

TabbyMumz · 27/12/2017 17:55

Ihavebrillohair....what a strange thing to say. People don't expect you to get childcare because of the need to keep a child warm and how often you may feel the need to take off coats etc. Snowsuits and tights are not dangerous inside?!

Wineasaurous · 27/12/2017 17:57

Ha!
I get this all the time.
My DS will not wear socks or shoes. When someone tried to comment on this in public I just pull out a pair of socks and offer them to get them on his feet. The few times people have tried and end up with a sock in the mouth has had me in stitches.

MrsTerryPratchett · 27/12/2017 17:58

"Some things are simply not open to negotiations with the kids, for the own safety!"

Absolutely. Those things are things that have long term consequences, or very bad consequences or consequences that are worse than the child can understand. This includes things like sunscreen. Cancer is the long term risk which my child cannot fathom. She gets 'being cold' and doesn't care. Never has.

Wineasaurous · 27/12/2017 18:02

Snowsuits and tights are not dangerous inside?!

I think she means the overheating element with all those layers on inside a sweaty shop.

RhodaBorrocks · 27/12/2017 18:06

DS has sensory issues and wouldn't wear shoes in his buggy ever. I kept a cosytoes type footmuff on the buggy in all but the warmer months and used to stuff him in that. He'd scream bloody murder at first every time, but would calm after a few minutes. Gloves and hats were a massive no. When he got to the getting out and wanting to walk phase it was hell convincing him he needed to put shows on. Shoes hurt him and he said any shoes (we tried them all!) were 'too tight' until he was about 7 and he finally got used to them. But there was no way I'd have let him riddle round Meadowhall in bare feet.

Funnily enough at 10 he hates the cold and wears full coat/hat/gloves by choice. But plenty of kids in our SEN group are still running around in shorts and t-shirts at this time of year and there's no way I'd judge.

TabbyMumz · 27/12/2017 18:08

It depends on how long you are in the shop though doesn't it!? If your child is warm and cosy and asleep, and you are only going to be in the shop a few minutes, you can leave them as they are. If you are going in for a cup of tea in a cafe then I would take them out the snowsuit. I still wouldn't call it dangerous. Much more dangerous to be outside freezing in inadequate clothing, than inside for a few minutes wrapped up.

lalalalyra · 27/12/2017 18:13

You are completely right, and not wanting to wear extra layers shouldn't even come into it.
Mine wore theirs, full stop.
I tried relentlessly until the most stubborn child you could imagine finally wore the extra layers.
I'd rather do this than fail and make them ill, it's a parents job.

Clearly you are a far superior parent than the rest of us...

TabbyMumz · 27/12/2017 18:17

Lalalalyra.....she hasn't tried to make out she's superior? She's just doing a parents job, keeping her child warm?

Eltonjohnssyrup · 27/12/2017 18:21

On a long car journey last week, one of mine not only managed to remove his tights and socks from under a snowsuit, but also his flipping nappy. He's like sodding Houdini. And his brother's like Tenzing Norgay climbing on everything.

I feel like a prisoner officer in a prison full of military nudist escape artists half the time.

Eltonjohnssyrup · 27/12/2017 18:22

*militant nudist escape artists

Wineasaurous · 27/12/2017 18:24

Tabby it depends where you shop yes. For me it would be public transport to either town or local shopping centre. Even in town all the shops I would visit are in a shopping centre so literally outside to walk to bus and from bus. A few hours inside vs a few minutes outside.
In all fairness, I do had a foot muff on and/or a pram suit but no socks or shoes as he will not wear them. Other than gaffa taping them to his feet there is no way of getting them to stay on. Pram suit comes off as we go into the shopping centre and back on when we leave, but he's often too hot on the bus.
Just can't win on this weather

Ellisandra · 27/12/2017 18:26

I don't think that children interpret / feel cold in the same way.

You know how at the beach the adult are grimacing with one foot on the cold shallows whilst the kids race up to their waists giggling?

It's not that it isn't "cold". It's just that cold isn't actually a bad thing. You don't catch a cold from being cold. You also don't get hypothermia from 20 minutes in 5° (well, I'm not a doctor but there's a temperature and duration that's fine!)

Sometimes, my child doesn't wear extra layers yet her hands are warm. Other times, her hands are cold. But she still doesn't want to wear them. Maybe the gloves are in the way of her fiddling with lip balms and god knows what other trinkets in her pockets!

Has to be actual snow before she'll zip up a coat.

The cold just doesn't bother her.
9 years old and 100% school attendance, been sick maybe 2x in her life?

Perhaps because she regularly invigorates her body and stimulates her immune system with a bit of bracing healthy cold!

reallyanotherone · 27/12/2017 18:26

You are completely right, and not wanting to wear extra layers shouldn't even come into it.
Mine wore theirs, full stop.
I tried relentlessly until the most stubborn child you could imagine finally wore the extra layers.
I'd rather do this than fail and make them ill, it's a parents job.

How many layers is “correct”? Where is the research that shows if it’s x degrees you need to wear a b and c or you will fall ill.

All those judging are judging by their own standards. Just because you would feel cold with no coat it doesn’t mean everyone else does too.

I would be a pretty crap parent if i made my child wear layers that made them just as uncomfortable temperature wise. And overheating can be far, far more dangerous than being cold. The obsession with hats and babies has been shown to be detrimental to their health, as they temperature regulate through their heads.

I went to a subsaharan country once in their “winter”. It was bloody boiling, we were swimming in the sea and wearing shorts. While the locals sat wearing jeans and jumpers saying it was winter and we’d catch a cold.

It’s not that my child won’t wear socks and gloves etc. She is simply not cold. If someone from a hot country came over here in our summer and told you to put a jumper because you must be cold, would you do it? So why should i make my child wear clothes they don’t need because of your opinion on the local temperature?

TheLegendOfBeans · 27/12/2017 18:28

This is the second time I’ve said it today but @eltonjohnssyrup

amazing post
amazing username