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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Tobhave made my husband two drinks this morning

73 replies

Deckerblue · 26/12/2017 20:08

Boxing Day morning ...
I'm heading off to work...

Rushing around sorting out the out DD. DH has a cold. Every morning we have a coffee , but as he has a cold I made him a lemsip and a coffee.

He said aggressively WTF do I want to drink a pint of lemsip and coffee before I get in the shower, have you never made lemsip before?! And proceeded to tip the coffee down the sink saying I've wasted it.

All through my day at work I've pondered what the hell I have done wrong. I text him saying I expect an apology for your actions this morning and he said "Wot fucking planet do u live on where u think I've got time to let a pint of boiling lemsip to cool and drink, then drink another pint of coffee"

The "pint" he is referring to , is that all our normal size cups were in the dishwasher , the only cups left we had were tall ones. Which I didn't fill up to the top anyway.

I'm feeling quite upset actually. Just want some AIBU to have made him two, albeit larger, drinks?

OP posts:
BrutusMcDogface · 26/12/2017 20:34

Oh you poor thing, if that's the tip of the ice berg as it sounds as though it is.

I would be delighted if my dp brought me a lemdip as well as my normal tea. His tea is often a bit too stewed for me but I'd never, ever tell him. I certainly wouldn't shout and swear and pour it away.

Flowers
LazyDailyMailJournos · 26/12/2017 20:42

He sounds like a twat.

If this is becoming commonplace and he's not trying to be reasonable, what are you going to do?

Life's too short to spend it with a rude man.

Flupi · 26/12/2017 20:43

Was he stressed at the thought of looking after dd as feeling unwell? Doesn’t excuse his rudeness though. Sometimes when you demand an apology it makes it harder for the other person to give one, so I don’t think those texts were necessarily a good thing to do. I should have no communication and when you get home see what the mood is like. If he frequently behaves like that it may be time to reassess what you want in the behaviour of your partner.

ManchesterGinglebells · 26/12/2017 20:46

I would make no further drinks. Ever. What an idiot.

HermioneAndTheSniffle · 26/12/2017 20:50

He was rude.
You tried to help him before going to work. You did something nice for him.
The only answer to what you did was THANK YOU.

MyBumpIsOnlyPudding · 26/12/2017 20:53

Like you @Deckerblue I would absolutely have two hot drinks in a row! What a tit! You definitely deserve an apology

Original poster
Deckerblue · 26/12/2017 20:54

He probably was stressed at the thought of looking after DD , post Xmas, with a cold.
But that's why I made the drinks. To make it easier. When all it's done is made the whole day harder , and when I get home from work it's all just fucking shit.
I'm really thinking about whether I want to spend 2018 with this ungrateful shitbag.

I'm looking on MN for opinions, but really, if it was me and I had a cold and he was going to work and I had to look after DD alone , and he made ME a coffee and a lemsip, I'd think he was the best DH ever and I would never even think about complaining about it.

OP posts:
DuckOffAutocorrectYouShiv · 26/12/2017 20:54

What a rude bellend. Him not you.

Homemenu1 · 26/12/2017 21:00

I wonder what comments he would have made if you hadn't made him a drink?

Can you not do right for doing wrong?

I'm projecting her but stbex said the other day in the morning i need to be up for 8, then went back to bed, I woke his at 8, he said who asked you to wake me up ( nasty aggressive tone) I can put my life on if I hadn't he would have said 'why didn't you wake me, I told you I needed to be up'
It's a set up a non win situation that gives him the opportunity to be a bully

Dominithecat · 26/12/2017 21:12

My DP has done the same thing for me, made me a huge tea and a lemsip. And I didn't want the huge tea. So I said thanks sweetie that's really lovely of you. Then later threw the tea away. When he wasn't around to see.
That's what people do.
Why would I want to upset him over 3pence worth of tea/coffee/whatever?

PurpleDaisies · 26/12/2017 21:13

Horrible behaviour from him.

Original poster
Deckerblue · 26/12/2017 21:14

Thanks Dominithecat
That's exactly what I wouldbhve done if I didn't want the other drink. (Except I know I would have drunk both hence not thinking twice about making two drinks)

I'm so sad

OP posts:
foodfrax · 26/12/2017 21:16

Oh, OP. That’s really upsetting for you. We make a cup of tea and a cup of coffee at the same time in this house!

YoureAllABunchOfBastards · 26/12/2017 21:17

I’d piss in his Lemsip tomorrow, the prick

froshiechipandbrickie · 26/12/2017 21:31

He probably was stressed at the thought of looking after DD , post Xmas, with a cold.

Fair enough. But that still doesn’t justify his reaction. And whilst people do tend to overreact in some instances... idk, I’d still expect them to apologise later. But what’s imo really concerning is that this sounds like a regular thing and not a one off / some sort of weird misunderstanding.

mumonashoestring · 26/12/2017 21:37

He's a raging cockend. Does he speak to you like this often? And if so,what are the consequences for him? Because honestly if my DH had done that he'd have been told to recalibrate himself before I got home - and to make his own fucking drinks in the future.

lanbro · 26/12/2017 21:38

If this is the norm, unreasonably ott reactions to very minor issues, leave. I did, life now is awesome.

Allthetuppences · 26/12/2017 21:40

Well. What a charmer he is. Tell him to go fish. An apology ffs! Very odd. Even if it went cold he could reheat it.

Turkkadin · 26/12/2017 21:46

Stop trying to win his approval. You are never going to get it and the harder you try the more he will love watching you.

LineyRunner · 26/12/2017 21:46

It's the lack of any tiny bit of remorse that's worrying.

Smurfy23 · 26/12/2017 21:48

No hes an arse. Dh would have been wearing the "pint" of lemsip if he came out with something like that. Id let him make his own drinks in future.

MrsMozart · 26/12/2017 21:49

Sorry m'duck but if this is the norm then I'd be exiting stage left.

LineyRunner · 26/12/2017 21:50

And the nasty text messages. They're soul sapping, aren't they?

BrutusMcDogface · 26/12/2017 21:52

This is by the by, but when I'm not pregnant I often make myself two teas at once, and chain drink them! Grin

New Years resolution: get yourself and your child away from that abusive shit. There are many wise people here on mn who can help you with the practicalities.

Nanny0gg · 26/12/2017 21:57

He probably was stressed at the thought of looking after DD , post Xmas, with a cold.

He has a cold poor lamb, not bloody pneumonia.

He needs to get over himself.