To ask what you think of his reaction to my bad experience

[thankgoditsdone]

I have a lot of horrible nightmares which involve being forced to do things I don't want to. They happen sometimes three or four times a week when I go through stressful times in my life. I don't think about them too much as I'm used to them, but last night I told short term boyfriend about a bad sexual experience that I had when I was 18 which was really upsetting and confusing for me at the time.

He probed me as to why I kept having the nightmares, and when I finally opened up about what had happened to me, he said "That's enough, I don't want to hear any more", turned over, and got in a mood with me.

I went on to say it doesn't bother me anymore, but I felt like he was in a real huff about it.

This morning he messaged me to say he's angry and upset that I didn't comfort him after I told him the story.

AIBU to think this isn't about him and he should have been comforting me, not the other way round?

I think he's given you the gift of truth: he's an arse and not someone from whom you can expect emotional support at any point. Thank him and move on, and find someone who does meet your needs.

No
Yanbu

He is.

Leave him

for you. I hope your nightmares stop. Is there anyone you can talk to properly maybe a counsellor?

As for him. Ditch and don't look back.

Wow. He’s a dickhead. Get shot of him.

What an arsehole.

What a prat, I don’t usually agree with the mn ‘leave him’ band wagon as you never have the whole story etc. But seriously unless you are ready to commit to someone that selfish Get rid.

My answer to the text would have been something along the lines of ‘I’m the one who was sexually assaulted why the fuck should you be getting the comfort?’

HE expected comfort about something horrific that happened to you?
Ditch him. He is never going to be there for you when you actually need him it's always going to be about him.
He has shown his true selfish nature you deserve better. Someone who actually cares about how you feel.

Sorry for your bad experience hope the nighmares pass. Have you had any support with what happened? Maybe you needsome to help the nightmares stop.

there is no point at all in being with someone who behaves that way. Honestly ditch him and move on. Dont settle for that crap. Sorry you had a bad experience.

He is not the one for you. Just imagine, every time you feel bad, it will all be about him.

Time to make him your ex. What a selfish prick.

Get rid

Sorry he's not decent is he??

Of course you're the one who should be comforted!

You should have comforted HIM? WTAF?! What drugs is he on?? I’m sorry, OP, he’s an idiot.

As ever on MN, a male you had a disagreement with is obviously worthless and you should leave him and end all romantic ties

As ever on MN, a male who has shown himself to have no empathy and a ridiculous sense of entitlement has shown himself to be unworthy of your time and affection. As ever on MN, women have encouraged you to value yourself enough not to settle for this wankbadger as a partner.

Fixed that for you etap.

Fuck that shit.

LTB

He really said you should have comforted you?

I'm struggling to imagine someone who would think they were the one who needed comforting. Very odd behaviour.

Well, he’s not a keeper.

What else did you need to know?

What a selfish spoilt man child. He's a prick.

Jesus. Ditch ditch ditch.

Op if he's worth keeping talk to him.
It might just be a massive shock to him and people do and say stupid things when in shock.

If he thinks that what he's done is ok the ltb.

He sounds horrible, I'm really sorry you didn't get any support from him. Run a mile, seriously.

etap
Yes cos he is such a caring sensitive soul op should have comforted him on his 2nd hand hearing of something awful that happened to HER.

Yep op should lower the bar right to the ground so she can put this selfish, entitled git without an iota of empathy first just cos she should be grateful she has a man in her life. And what a keeper he is!

Its not a disagreement he is telling her his feelings are more important than what happened to her which was bad enough to still give her nightmares years later.

Wow. He needs to be comforted after you told him about something awful that happened to you???

Hard but be grateful he has revealed himself.

Another abuser in the making id say